Nevermind
by Miyuh
Summary: Reese had always heard stories about the notorious Billy Darley. It wasn't until he had his hooks dug deep in the young girl that she realizes he might not be the man she thought he was. For better or worse Reese can't seem to let him go.
1. Prologue

"Next" I sigh, one would say I sounded like my dog just died. Like I had something stuck up my ass.

As far as one was concerned these things were probably true.

I mean being miserable in this town is like having an asshole...

With my head down I try my best to clean up my work station. I'm pretty much apt to getting written up these days.

Inhaling deeply I slam the cash register drawer shut and grunt out.

"Next" a bit louder. I glanced up quickly to see a figure before me. I jumped from instinct and hold my hand over my heart.

"Shit...oh dammit" I looked over my shoulder to see if my supervisor, the grimy little snitch was anywhere near me. I could hear that nasally little gremlin complaining to our boss now, "Reese's incessant use of profanity in front of the customers is becoming problematic"

"Sorry" I sigh bending down to pick up a bill I dropped on the floor. I put it away quickly and stand up straight. My eyes trail up the body of the man towering over me, making me gasp loudly.

He just stood there grinning at me, like the devil would do at people like me. Seducing my soul right from under me with every twitch of every muscle it took for him to smile at me like that.

"S-sorry sir; Welcome to McDonalds how can I help you?"

"Sir?" he chuckles shaking his head slightly and chuckling. I simply shrug, not knowing what else to do. Then the legend himself ordered 2 Big Macs, large fries, a large coke no ice and an apple-no two apple pies-to go.

Once my shaky fingers punched in his order, he paid with a 50 and let me keep the change. Making me feel like a peasant when I said thank you barely above a whisper.

I was more than greatful when he stepped away to the side, even though there was no other customer for me to service. Those 5 minutes it took for his food were the most nerve wrecking of my life, well maybe of today. He just stood there staring at me for the first 2 until he opened his mouth.

"So, you have t' call me Sir?" he said.

I was born and raised here, my accent was prominent but Billy, where he hailed leaked from his pores. How his v's became light f's and everything with ending with an er automatically became uh or ah. Don't get me wrong I suffer from the same urban dialect but I make an effort at least once a day to pronounce at least one er.

"You and every other Sir that walks in here" I reply surprisingly a lot more collected and calmer than I felt.

He raises a brow and for the first time I look him in the eye. Which proved to be even more nerve wrecking. This gorgeous skin head was making me sweat.

"Unhunnh" he says dubiously, "And what do us Sir's call you?" he asks

I look down at my name tag and back up at him. His gaze sucking me in like a black hole.

"Reese"

He made a noise like a low grumble, like a cat purrs but more...manly?

"Reese, I'm Billy" he reached across the counter with his calloused hand open, ready to be embraced. I froze up for a moment, small enough for him not to see.

I must say his manners are impeccable with a reputation such as his.

"Nice to m-meet you, Billy" I nod with a somewhat forced smile. I had to get passed all the deeply imbedded fear for a simple smirk.

I squeezed his hand and he squeezed back before my co-worker bought over his bag of food. I let my hand slip from his and hand him the bag.

If there was one thing I learned about Billy Darley after today it's that he kept his word. Well...the ones he meant at least.

As my next customer stepped up he stalked away, people parting like the red sea to let him through. From the door he bellows for everyone to hear.

"See'ya 'round Reese!"


	2. Polite

"What was he like?" my younger brother asked as I filled his plate of spaghetti. He stood beside me, his arms and head rested against the counter I noticed he's just grown to reach.

His big brown eyes gazed up at me in wonder and excitement a child his age should have for a new toy, or video game. Not a gun slinging thug I couldn't stop thinking about.

"He was...tall" I reply not wanting to say anything that might influence him in any direction. Not to revere the man or be absolutely terrified of him. I just wanted things to be as they were.

"Tall? Reese, everybody's tall to me" he replies standing up on his tip toes for a second.

"True, but what else do you want me to say about him?" I ask handing him his plate and following him to the living room.

"Was he mean? Did he have a gun?"

I snort as we plop down on the couch in front of the TV. Both of us stuffing our faces with the food I cooked.

"He didn't come in Mc'Donalds wielding a gun Jase" I reply. "And he was actually really polite"

He looked up at me with a raised brow.

"Polite? Billy Darley is polite?" he asks as if I was insane.

"Yes, he probably thanks his sister for making him amazing spaghetti and meatballs."

Jase snorts, "Billy doesn't have a sister" he replies. Apparently my little brother is the expert on all things Billy Darley.

"And how would you know that?"

"Because he killed his entire family that's how I know" he retorts.

I chuckle and don't bother disproving the rumor by telling him I went to school with his brother.

"Well, I hope he doesn't spend to much time at my work then"

"What time does mommy get off work?" she asks wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

"3 again, did you finish your homework?" then like every other night we watched TV until he dropped. Which was ceremoniously 9 o'clock.

I carried him to his bed and tucked him in, cleaned the house and went to my own room where I did my homework and stayed up until I heard my mother come in. Then I fell asleep, mentally going over my schedule, preparing myself to do it all over again.

The bus was later than usual, so I ended up walking to work. On my way I passed Four Roses. The bar where all the dead beat degenerates gather.

I've been inside once or twice before, nothing special. It was a crowded room that smelled like booze and depression, I try to avoid it as much as possible. But walking by today I noticed the large black mustang out front, red tribal markings allover it and a very angry man walking toward it. I slowed down a bit and recognized it was none other than Sir Darley. He was wearing close to nothing considering the frigid weather.

He paced the side of the car having just slammed the door open with a phone to his ear, barking at the person on the other end.

"You better pray t' whoever it is y'believe in that I'm in a good fuckin' mood when I see ya" he didn't even need to yell. He just spoke calmly, like a parent would to their kid when their far too pissed to yell. Only this parent had no problem dismembering this kid for possibly not paying them.

And here I am, not paying attention. The world could have been falling down around me but here I stand clenching my sweaty hands in my pockets unable to move as I stared at him. Entranced by this man stomping around blowing smoke from his ears.

It wasn't until I saw a pair sea blue eyes gazing into my own that I regained my attention. I gasped and suddenly my feet were working, working faster than I want to admit.

As I walked past him I felt my heart lurch into my throat. Especially with his eyes trained on me, his head moving with me as I tried not to faint.

"Don't make me look for you" he says to whoever he was speaking to. His attention now focused elsewhere, to say it's me that grabbed it is presumptuous. Let's just say the pretty face from Mc'Donalds did it. Maybe it's my ass that was working for him, I try to work out.

I just made it passed his car when his gruff voice called out to me, "Ayy".

Without hesitation I turn to face him, "Hunh?" I squeak squeezing my fist tighter. Feeling my toes clench and curl in my boots.

"You workin' t'day?"

I froze again having no idea what to do. I could barely think around him, and speaking seemed even more complicated. Why? I can't really explain, I'd say most of it is because I'm terrified that if I don't comply to him that I'll be another body lying in a ditch somewhere. The rest of those nerves and achy feelings are of course because...well he is fun to look at.

I settle for a none to revealing nod, he also replies with a nod. I was dismissed without knowing why in the hell he wanted to know my work schedule. And this underlying fear in knowing that I'd soon find out.

**A/N: Short I know I'm sorry, more Billy and longer chapters to come :)**


	3. Relax

"Reese, would you mind sweeping the side steps?" of course I don't mind. If I did mind then I'd probably be fired, and I need this job.

I snatch the broom and dustpan from the gremlin with a fake smile. He returned the gesture and nodded as he walked off, crossing me off the checklist of his.

"God I can't wait to get out of this fucking place" I hide to myself as I go around the side of the building to sweep up the trash littered there.

All while talking to myself to keep me sane throughout the day.

People passed me by without second thought of the chick talking to herself. Wouldn't be anything new to the people of this town.

"Fucking gremlin look alike. Hate this place" I snap.

I was just about to sweep the trash I swept together into the pan when I heard a chuckle from beside me. Turning my head I gasp when I see Billy leaning against his car. Arms folded over his chest and a cigarette behind his ear.

My heart pounded faster than ever as I dropped the broom and took a step back.

"My bad, didn't mean t'scare ya" he says smiling at me. His white teeth showing just a bit as his eyes seemed to light up.

I just stared at him for a moment, not sure what to say or do.

"I-I...it's okay" I reply leaning over to pick up the broom. My hands suddenly became shaky, every action I'd perform from then on would be done with the utmost caution and finesse.

It's been about a week since that day I passed the bar. He didn't show up like I thought and secretly hoped he would. So I chalked the two encounters up to just a day, or two that I ran into Billy Darley. I was dumb for thinking anymore of the incidents. Wasn't I?

"Reese right?" he asks pushing himself off the car. I gasped and gripped the old broom until I felt splinters poke me as he made his way to the steps. He stayed at the bottom one, letting one of his boot covered feet linger on the first step.

Deciding that I spent more than enough time with my mouth open I nod.

"Yea" I squeak licking over my lips. I catch his eyes flicker down to them as i nervously push hair behind my ear.

Again he grinned at me, that grin made to seduce every ounce of will power I possessed. He stepped up once more until he was a step below me.

Watching me like I was food, or a high priced car; or maybe in his case a high priced hooker on sale, I don't know.

"You remember who I am?" he asks. I would have if I was brave enough called that a stupid question.

"Billy" I say clearing my throat.

His grin widens before he nods at me, never breaking eye contact with me as he replies.

"Good" that deep voice of his seemed to only deeper and raspier.

With confidence I knew no existence of I ask.

"Why's that good?"

Billy chuckles and steps down back onto the sidewalk. He didn't answer and gave me one last lingering look before he was in his car, driving away.

"Late isn't a time Reese" my mother sighs as she walks past my open door with another laundry bin filled with clothes.

"I know, Ma" I reply as I tried with my shaky hands to apply my eye liner.

I catch her gaze through the mirror and ignore with raised brow.

She puts the hamper on the floor and her hand on her hip. Knowing that I knew that gesture and the look meant business.

"Ma, it's a party...it's already 9:30. I don't know what time I'll be back"

Rolling her eyes she leans over slowly and grabs the bin again.

"If it's past 3, stay with Tee, she is goin' I'm assuming?"

I nod as I start on my eye shadow.

"Be careful Reese, don't do anything stupid"

Again through the mirror she gives me the other look. The one that you expect when you know you'll never live something down.

"I _wont_" I groan "I'm not drinking, I'm not smoking I might dance with a few guys but that's all. I promise"

"You used to say that a lot you know" she says still staring intently at me. I couldn't even be mad or annoyed at her anymore. She has every right to worry.

"I mean it now, Ma" I say turning to face her from my vanity.

She stood there for a long time just watching me.

"Be safe, and wear those shoes that match that one purse so you can fit the pepper spray in it" she says with a nod before she walks away.

On my way out I ruffle Jason's hair and kiss my mother on the cheek.

"See you in the morning"

Outside waiting for me in her fathers car was Tee. My best friend since preschool. She leaned over to the passenger window and yelled out.

"Hurry up bitch, we're gonna be late!"

Rolling my eyes I walk only a bit faster which wasn't much considering the heels I was wearing.

"Late for what Tee, it's a fucking party"

"We have to make a stop" she retorts as I get in. She starts the car and presses the gas hard, peeling out onto the street with a loud screech.

"A stop? Where?" I ask warily, pulling on my seatbelt. Nothing was ever simple with this girl. A stop probably meant nothing of the sort.

"Picking up a friend, relax"

Just the same, a friend was not simply a friend in Tia's case.

"Who's the guy?" I ask kicking off my heels until we reached the club I town.

"Remember Joe from school?"

"There were like 10 Joe's Tia, specifics"

"From sophomore year, remember he dropped ou-"

"Joe Darley?" there's that damned name again. Of course I knew the youngest Darley. Yet another thug who'd earned a name for himself. Mostly because of his nasty mouth. And let's not forget his older brother who I'd heard wasn't really about letting people fuck with his family.

"Yes" she nods

"Are you crazy?" I ask.

"I'm not, we ran into each other at that party you bailed on l-"

"You mean that party that got busted the first 5 minutes at their house?"

Weeks before we'd been invited by a friend of a friend to a party the Darley's were hosting at their place. In no way was I interested in lounging around with a bunch of felons and gang bangers. Tia however was. And for the record, no matter how sexy and mysterious I find the older Darley to be theirs no way I'd ever become [i]that[/i] interested in him.

"Anyway, we been texting' ever since. He's a sweetheart actually?"

Sure that only means he probably asked what flavor condom she liked. That was pretty mean...

"I guess, so he's coming with _us_ to a _dance_ club?" I ask snorting.

"Sorry I just don't see the appeal"

When she didn't reply I stared at her for a moment. She was smirking a bit and I instantly knew what that meant.

"Ohh okay...the appeal is sex. Tee if you wanted to get laid there was no need to drag me along" I sigh exasperatedly fumbling with the dress used my last pay check for.

"We're not Reese, I just wanted to hang out with him for a while. But the thing is that the club is kinda out..."

"What the hell does _kinda_ out mean?"

"I don't sound like that, and it means that if you don't get to pissed and demand I take you home that we're going to a bar"

"Where?" I ask immediately

"Heard of Four Roses?"

My heart sank, could this evening get any better? Insert heavy sarcasm.

"Heard of it, Tia it's the Darley gangs fucking den. Why are you doing this, do you want us to get killed?"

"I highly doubt anyone would want to kill us, we're fucking hot"

"Oh gosh thanks for the compliment, now we'll just get raped first"

She inhaled deeply and sighed and I notice we turn a corner. The bar is at the end of the street the only thing remotely lively on the block except for a stray cat strolling by.

"You're being dramatic. We were invited, we'll be fine"

Again my outfit reminds me of myself.

"Seriously" I grouse pulling at the short length of my dress. "You couldn't tell me this before, I would have dressed prepared for this" I can already feel the eyes laying it thick on my bare legs.

"Would you please try to relax and keep an open mind. You're usually up for anything"

"Almost anything Tee, you seem to forget how things were two years ago, my mother barely trusts me to go to the store for her"

"Is she still on that, god. Listen to me" she says as she parks behind some car. She turns to face me with a serious look.

"Nothing bad will happen, if anything happens, anything you don't like we can go. Just say the word and we're gone"

My eyes flicker down to her slightly open legs and then back at the bar behind me.

"Fine. By the way I can see your vagina when you sit like that"

From the moment we stepped through the door it was as if life itself had stopped. In no way am I being conceited or anything but seriously. Everyone stopped what they were doing and eyes us like we were meals on legs. I pushed again at the hem of my dress.

How out of place we looked, the only women in the place and ot to mention I was dressed in this brightly colored cocktail thing that stopped well above my knee with 6 inch knock offs.

Tia was even worse but seemed to be right at home in the smoky pub. She had on a black dress, just as short as mine with a plunging neck line. Not to mention she's much curvier than I am.

Compared to my tall slightly curved body frame, caramel skin and dark hair she was the exact opposite. Short, pale, curvy and blond.

"Let's get out before they stake us" I whisper from the side of my mouth.

She snickers and grasps my hand as we step further into the room. People whispered and pointed and I all of a sudden felt like I was the main attraction at some disgusting circus.

We walked through, her taking the lead until we reached a more secluded part of the bar. There was a long wooden table with about 10 chairs around it. A few drinks were scattered across it but was empty for the most part.

To the left of the table further back was a pool table. Around it stood 2 guys. One I immediately recognized as Joe Darely, he looked a lot scruffier since highschool. A Spanish guy who looks like he was having a hard time standing straight stood across from him. You could see his dialated pupils from practically down the street.

Tia subtly cleared her throat and Joe snapped his head back. A big smile came over him and he put the pool stick he was holding down on the table. She let go of my hand and grinned as he walked over to her.

"Ayy" he said softly wrapping his arms around her. Letting his grubby little hands grip and squeeze her ass. Raising a brow at them I simply take note, exactly how well did they know each other?

"How are you?" Tia whispers

"Fuckin' perfect _now,_ you look good" he let his eyes wander allover her body.

"You think so?" she asks licking her lips, putting on the charm.

He just made a noise and I couldn't help but gasp, he sounded just like Billy.

"Who's this?" he asks wrapping his arm around her waist as they both turned to face me.

I smile at him and wave.

"This is Reese, my best friend. She went to school with us"

"I remember, you used to have glasses" he nods

I have to say I was flattered at his memory.

"Still have them" I nod.

He smiles, "I'm Joe" he says holding out his hand. These manners are throwing my head for a spin.

"Nice to meet you" I say trying not to look as surprised. He squeezed my hand firmly and eyes me up and down for a moment. Then he looks at Tia and does the same for longer.

"You two don'look dressed for this shit-hole" he strolls over to the table and we follow.

"I had to get this one out of the house" Tia says pointing back at me as she holds his hand and leans up pecking his cheek.

Joe smirks at me then at Tia, "You two want a drink?" he asks raising a brow at us as he makes his way to the bar.

"You can sit if you want"

"Yea, just get some shots and none of that dark shit you and your brother drink"

Joe laughs and stalks off, his red hair gleaming under the dim lighting.

"Oh so you drink with the Darley's now?" I ask crossing my arms over my chest taking a seat at the far end of the table in the corner. She sits across from me and shakes her head.

"Once, I got way too drunk and fucking threw up all back there" she smiles pointing to the darkened hallway beyond the pool table.

"Charming" I snort stiffly.

I could feel her gaze burning into me and ignored her my best. It took a while, and I held out longer than usual but her stare broke me down. I sighed and dropped my head and then my arms.

"He's not gonna be here is he?" I ask warily, looking at her from across the table. My eyes flickering quickly to the guy who was nodding off in the corner.

"Who?" she asks leaning closer.

"Billy" I say in an almost hushed tone. Like his name was forbidden to speak.

"He's really not the bad, unless he's extremely pissed. Which it doesn't take long to get for him bu-"

"No I'm not that scared of seeing him because I'm scared of him" I lie "He, he came to my work a couple weeks ago."

"What happened?" she asks shrugging.

"Nothing much, he asked my name, got some food. But he came by again the other day and didn't"

"Didn't what?"

Before I could finish Joe came back with a tray of six shots. He placed it down and started handing them out.

"To the head, both shots, no bitching out" he says placing two in front of Tia then me and taking the seat beside her stretching his arm across the back of her chair. She kept her eyes on me for a second letting me know the talk wasn't over.

I looked down at the two rather large shots of clear liquid, assuming it was vodka aka my cup-or cups of tea. And okay I lied to my mother, but a couple shots won't hurt. Besides I know I'll need this if I plan on having even a semblance of a good time tonight.

Before the new couple could even think about lifting their glasses I was putting the second glass to my lips. I slammed it down with a guff and took a deep breath.

When I peeled open my eyes Tia and Joe were gazing at me curiously. He with a smirk and a raised brow and Tia with squinted eyes.

"I like her" he says to Tia.

There's a term that Tia and I used to use a couple years ago. When we were wild and younger, carrying on in these streets without a care in the world. On those days and nights when we were good and drunk, or high one of us would look at the other with our red drunken eyes and slur.

"I feel _niice"_

Joe bought himself and I, 3 more shots and by my 5th I was there. I had just enough alcohol in my system to forget my worries.

"We're done after this Reese" she says pointing a stern finger at me. She was for the most part sober, since she was driving tonight.

"Done as in going home? 'Cause I don't wanna go I wanna staaay" I whine

"No drinking I meant, that's the last shot" she says pointing to the glass I slipped from Joe's hand.

"Mmhm last shot" I nod and down it. I put it down on the table and grin. The burn was gone now and it was only like a dull reminder.

When I came to, Joe and Tia were off in their own world and I was having trouble staying in my seat.

Just when I was thinking of finding whatever music source there was playing soft rock and dancing like a hippie the front door opened. People seemed to make a little less noise than earlier as several sets of heavy feet strolled through the room. And then rounding the small corner was him. The man who churned my guts into a million little knots over. Shit.

**A/N: I know I promised Billy in this chapter but there has to be some build up for you all. He will definitely be in the next chapter though. Which I might even upload tomorrow, I'm not sure yet. Review :) They spur my writing... **


	4. Little Girl

**A/N: Sorry for the wait there, but thank you all for the wonderful reviews :)**

My heart would not slow down, from the moment he looked at me it'd been in overdrive. Tia broke away from Joe's neck and called out to Billy.

"This is my best friend Re-"

Before she could finish, and focusing his eyes back on me he said my name. I gasped a bit and I was suddenly even more aware of him, and not his two friends on either side of me trying to see down my dress.

"You two met?" Joe asks pointing between us.

I was going to answer tearing my gaze away from him and over to Joe. But even though I wasn't looking at him I found I couldn't speak. How was I supposed to with him staring at me. So, I just nodded at him.

"How, where at?" Tia asks.

"Uh-uhm I-" I never stutter.

"Her job" Billy says nonchalantly clearing his throat as I heard a bunch of shuffling from where he sat. When I glanced at him again he was down to a black long sleeved shirt. Effortlessly showing off his broad chest and arms. Along with the tribal tattoos crawling up his neck and down his arms.

What a man...

"Well we ain't been introduced" the man to my right said putting his arm around the back of my chair.

I looked over at him with a raised brow and moved back from how close we were.

"I'm Reese, who are you?" I ask a bit less than politely.

"Bodie" he says with a grin. "Pleased t'meetchu"

"Yea you two" I turned away from him and reached back to remove his arm as I did. Earning a few laughs from people at the table. Including Billy.

"And you are? I ask the man to my left with Carpe Diem tattood on across his neck.

"Baggy" he says gazing directly at my boobs.

Putting my hand over my cleavage I sigh as he lifts his head to meet my eyes.

"Thank you, I'm Reese nice to meet you"

He grinned tightly and nodded before he turned away. The rest of the guys were either in their own world talking or in the back playing pool.

I rolled my eyes and folded my arms over my chest. The aggravation I felt was pretty obvious and my [i]niiice[/i] feeling diminishing by the minute.

Tia was full on making out with Joe now and I couldn't stand sitting here for one more minute.

"Okay, excuse me Bodie I need to..." I trail off gesturing away from the table. He stood up and I did as well, knowing the moment I did I'd be the subject of these barbaric men's attention.

I took my clutch and pulled down at my dress as I stepped in front of him, my back to him. Knowing I'd brush up against him either way, which is what I know he'a grinning at.

As I walked away and Tia called out to me I could hear one of them whistle at me.

I plopped down at the bar even though I knew I couldn't get a drink on my own. I was just trying to breathe and over here it was easy as ever. So dropping my head in my arms against the bar I take a long deep breath.

"You okay?" the bartender asks, his accent making it sound like he wasn't even speaking English.

"Si" I nod looking up at him with a plastered smile.

"You sure?" he asks in Spanish. Smiling wider I nod again.

"Just not my night" I sigh as well in my first language.

He smiled before he walks away and comes back with a shot.

"On the house"

I really didn't need anymore but decided nothing too bad could happen. I was already sobering up and I'd stay at Tia's tonight then go home during lunch. My mother wouldn't know a thing and I could wallow about being this weak in my room for the rest of the day.

"Thanks" I say closing my eyes and taking back the shot quickly. When I opened my eyes he was staring at me with his wide like most people do.

As I pushed the glass back to him a voice from behind me exclaimed.

"Damn" sounding impressed. "Sam you ever seen a little girl take a shot like that?"

I bit my lip hard, recognizing that voice instantly. There goes my heart again.

He took the seat to the left of me and I looked over at him with a nervous smile.

"Little girl?" I ask

He nods at me then at the bartender, Sam. Who went off and started making a drink.

"Yeah" is all he says. Watching me intently, like he was trying to solve some puzzle. I looked away from him and drummed my fingers against the hardwood counter top.

"I'm sorry about them" out of the corner of my eye I see him nod to the back. I simply shrug.

"Can't blame them for being themselves. I suppose I'm dressed to fit whatever part it is they think I'm playing."

"What part is that?" he asks as Sam hands him a large mug of something then drops a shot glass in it. I watched as the drink flowed over the rim with foam.

He let it sit there and I answered.

"Tia told me we were going dancing tonight so.." I trial off "I figured I could have one whorish evening"

His eyes raked down and up my body, my eyes following his the whole way.

"You dance in that?" He asks with a raised brow, a confused look on his face.

Smiling I nod.

"When I do decide to go out. I don't wear stuff like this often of ever"

He nods and takes the first gulp from his drink.

It became quiet between us for a moment and for the first time I couldn't feel his eyes burning against me.

"How old a'you exactly, you ain't like 16 right?"

"Do I look 16?" I retort with a snort.

"Can never tell these days, girls are sproutin' tits out the womb" his eyes flickered to my breasts when he said tits making me blush.

I gasp and can't help but laugh, covering my mouth as I did.

"That's sick"

Smiling himself he again looks me in the eye. Beautiful, even with all the scars and blemishes from old wounds on his face, his smile seemed to glow. His sea blue eyes were even more gorgeous.

"I'm 19"

He nods and licks over his lips. I couldn't help but watch it, his lips and his tongue. Then as if he knew I liked it made that grumbling purry noise.

"You in school or somethin'?"

I shake my head no and shrug.

"Not yet, saving up. Can I ask you something?"

"Depends" he replies gulping down more of his drink. I glanced down at the multiple rings on his finger before replying.

"On?"

"Come back here tomorrow"

My jaw dropped and I ask.

"Tomorrow? Why?"

"Why not?" he asks without missing a beat.

I roll my eyes at him and shake my head. My face was hot, and I knew he could see the blush allover it.

"What time? Not late because I have to work-"

"Come around 5"

Surprising is all I have to say about my conversation with him. He's not who every one thinks he is. Well from what he's shown me, from what I can see he's a level headed guy and not the raging lunatic I hear about. But I won't judge too soon.

"Fine, 5. But what I wanted to ask was, why did you uhh-the other day...why did you come to my work?"

Again that smile and I'm entranced.

"I'll tell you if you come tomorrow" with that he stood up and went back to where everyone else was.

I decided to join them again, well instead I went to the pool table and watched a game between Joe and Billy. The minute I walked over as Billy leans over to take a shot he looked up and winked at me.

I looked down and giggled helplessly. And that's how the rest of my night/morning went. Sneaking glances, smirks and smiles. Winking and secretly (mostly on my part) gazing at the other from across the room. He was fascinating, and just as fascinating as he was I knew there was danger written all over him.

Around 3 when the bar closed and everyone who was left was on their way out he stopped me. Tia and Joe were making out in front of her car as a goodbye. And the rest of his friends were piling in his car.

"Ayy" he called out to me like the other day. I turn to face him humming in response. He was digging through the pockets of his jacket before he found a cigarette and lighter. After he plucked the cigarette between his lips he asks.

"Gotta phone?"

I shake my head no.

"You fuckin' with me?" he asks as he lights it looking as if he didn't believe me.

"Can't afford it, and I don't like them anyway" I shrug.

He simply nods as he exhales smoke, taking two steps he was right in front of me. And then as he started to walk away he put his hand on my hip and and held the cigarette away as he leaned close.

"See'ya Reese"

His hand slid a bit down my hip to my thigh before he walked away without so much as a look back as he got in his car; yelling for Joe to get in as well.

I stood there like an idiot watching as his car sped away.

"Reese...Earth to Reese let's go!" Tia exclaims walking to the drivers side. I joined her slowly, still processing what just happened.

"So how was that kiss, I saw that before he left" Tia says as she climbed in her bed beside me. I gazed at her with my head rested on my hand, propped up against a pillow.

"We didn't- he didn't kiss me, he said goodbye" I yawn.

"Goodbye? Billy?" she asks acting as if I just told her I was a martian.

"Is it such a foreign act saying bye to someone?" I chuckle thinking of the strong scent that enveloped me whenever he was close tonight. Like old spice and cigarettes.

"For Billy and a girl he wants to fuck. Yes it is"

My face burned and I cleared my throat uncomfortably.

"He does not" I mutter lying to myself and her. I was well aware of his reputation.

"Oh yes he does, he marked you. Why you think Bodie laid off you and looked so pissed?"

I sat up quickly and glared at her.

"Marked me? What the fuck does that even mean?"

"Keep it down, and he likes you so no one else can even think about touching-"

"Tia, I'm not fucking property this guy can stamp his name on"

Tia rolled her eyes and shrugged, then nonchalantly she sighs

"It's already done"

**A/N: Hope you liked it, I'm shooting to update Wednesday and since my birthday is the day after you all should do me a solid and leave me reviews as presents ;)**


	5. Conquer

I didn't go to the fucking Four Roses the next day. And even though the idea was burned into my mind that he apparently had marked me. And was enough to make me despise him for as long as possible I still thought about him.

And every thought about him led me to the unforgettable thought that he just wants what's in my pants. And to think I was naive enough to think he wasn't who I thought he was. There I was, gazing at this fucking dick head all doe eyed.

"Fuck you Billy Darely" I mutter as I shuffle around the fries I was looking over as they tried.

"Language Reese" my boss says having passed by at that exact moment.

And to think he sent a message through Tia when I hadn't shown up is like the icing in the cake.

"Fuck both of you"

**Next day**

It was the only day off I had this week, choosing a double shift since we lost someone. It was really the only time I had to spend with Jason besides coming home to cook him dinner and tuck him in; then turning around and going right back out to work.

I decided to instead of sleeping all day and leaving my little brother to sit in front of the TV, I'd splurg him just a little.

I managed to save just enough to buy him a new video game and take him out to eat.

"So how goes life?" I ask putting my arm around him as he made a mess of his face with the chocolate sprinkled cone he got.

We strolled down the somewhat busy street downtown without a care.

"Ehh" he shrugs swinging his GameStop bag.

"Ehh? What's ehh?" I ask.

"Nothin' I guess things are okay?"

"You guess, you're 7, life should be peachy"

"When can I get a job Pieces?" he asks using his nickname for me ever since he could talk. When he was a baby and my mother and I tried to teach him my name, my mother said 'Like Reese's Pieces' and all he could say was Peeshez. When he learned to speak better, it stuck.

"Uhh you got about 9 more years, why?"

"'Cause you and mommy work too much- I wanna help" he says looking up at me with the look I knew meant he was serious.

"You do help, by playin' Call'a'Duty all day long" I say jokingly, ticking his neck making him shrug away and giggle.

"But seriously kid, don't worry about the money thing-we're okay. Let the grown ups take care of it"

My brother scoffs and replies.

"You're not grown"

"Oh I'm not?" I ask as he took off in front of me. We chased each other up the block until we reached the next one. Just as we caught our breath having thrown away our melted cones a car with a heavy engine creeped up beside us. I looked over quickly, and my heart fell to my butt. There hanging out the window. His eyes studying me as he managed to cruise effortlessly, barely looking where he was going.

I started to walk faster, hoping Jason didn't see him. Which was becoming increasingly harder avoid with him driving at the pace we walked.

But of course he'd blow it all to hell when he called out to me.

"Reeeese..." he said dragging out the ee in my name.

I snapped my head toward him and glared fiercely only to be met with his smile.

Jason looked around me and gasped.

"Oh my god it's him" he exclaimed, gazing at the car in awe. I pulled him along faster and ignored Billy as he drove a bit faster singing my name again.

"Reese's pieeces" I stopped walking and glanced at him with furrowed brows.

I looked back down at Jason who looked up at me with all the questions I knew I'd have to answer later in his eyes.

"Stay where you are, don't move" I say sternly, making him stand closer to the corner store we were in front of.

He nods and I give him a stern look before I walk over to Billy's car.

He'd come to a complete stop and was smirking up at me with a shit eating grin. Through his window I could see Bodie and his other friend who was drugged out the other night.

"Why'd you call me that?" I snap.

For a moment I thought he talked to Tia, and just maybe she'd told him my whole fucking life story.

His smile turned to a smirk and he cockily replied.

"'Cause you look like you taste sweet. Do you?" he nods up at me.

My face turned to that of disgust, although on the inside I was shivering. My heart was pumping and I couldn't help but clench my legs together.

"You're revolting. What do you want?" I ask crossing arms over my chest as his grin grew wide, reaching his eyes.

"Y'know I ain't been ditched since-"

"I'm sorry I damaged your ego. Is there something else you wanted?" I guess my anger took place of the nerves I'd usually feel toward him.

His smile dropped and he just stared for a moment. I couldn't help but fidget under his gaze. As if he remembered something he looked past me and I instantly blocked his gaze from Jase.

"Your kid?" he asks. It might seem ridiculous that he's asking me that question, knowing my age. But around here that's something you get used to.

"Brother. Look Billy" I wasn't sure how turning down the almighty Darely would turn out, but I have to at least give it a try.

"I don't know what expectations you have of me. But I'm respectfully declining, if you wanna be friends then-"

He furrowed his brows and I knew he was taken aback.

"What the fuck a'you talkin' about?"

"I'm not interested in being some venture for you to conquer."

Still he looked confused for a moment before chuckled and rubbed his head over his shaved head.

"If all I wanted was to fuck you I wouldn't be goin' through all this trouble ,Reese"

"What does _that_ mean?" I wanted to yell but kept it down to a low hiss.

He smiles at me and licks his lips before he reached out to me. I stepped back quickly and shook my head no. He sighed still smiling.

"I gotta go, you worki-"

"No, I quit" I lie. He knew this and laughed at me.

"Alright" normally a response like that meant that person was giving up right?

**A/N**: **So sorry for the delay...I was busy all week, and I know this is terribly short. But to make up for that I'm uploading the next chapter like now-ish. :)**

**Thank you all for the wonderful reviews they really really keep me going. Let me know what you all think about this chapter before you read the next.**


	6. Don't Hide

**A/N**: **This is probably my favorite chapter so far...hope you like it :) Review review review!**

It was almost 2 am, and for various work related reasons I'm waiting for the bus. One being the fact that I had to clean the bathroom which was covered in vomit. And the other because someone else quit and I had to help clean the kitchen, as well as the entire restaurant.

Although most girls would be scared and nervous in this neighborhood at this time, alone I was somewhat at ease. Huddled up to myself with my face buried in a book. I wasn't that dense though, one of my hands was buried in my pocket, clutching my can of pepper spray.

I was really into a specific chapter, regrettably letting my full attention become absorbed completely into it. I hadn't noticed a black mustang pull up in front of me. And I guess I didn't notice Billy calling out to me from the open window because next thing I know he's in front of me roughly shaking my shoulder.

I immediately screamed and pulled out the pepper spray. Looking up and seeing it was him I sighed heavily and shut my eyes and taking deep breaths to calm my heart. His angry eyes flickered down to the can and I stuffed it back in my pocket.

"Billy" I sigh holding my heart

"What the fuck is wrong wit'you- don't let your fucking guard down like that around here" he was actually mad and I knew that for a fact. His blazing eyes were fixed on mine and I couldn't look away. I felt like a child being scolded and felt the fear a child would at the prospect of being punished.

I blinked and nodded, "Okay" I mutter softly furrowing my brows and shrugging away from him.

His glare softened and he shook his head.

"I didn't mean t'yell, just...be careful. What the hell are you doin' out here this late anyway?"

"Work" I reply stiffly, highly uncomfortable in this situation. "I h-had a double shift"

He simply nods before he looked down the street where the bus should be coming from. He looked back down at me and I cowered under his gaze still.

"C'mon I'll take ya home, the bus ain't comin' no time soon"

I hesitated for a moment and he simply raised a brow.

I glanced at his car and nodded as I stood up and followed him to it.

Inside his car, after I gave him directions was nerve wracking and distracting. I pretended to read my book and flipped through the pages although I was comprehending nothing and reading the same sentences multiple times.

"Thought you quit ya job?" he asks amused.

I looked over at him with a raised brow. He glanced at me smirking and I find myself perplexed. Just a few short minutes ago he looked as if he wanted to knock my block off.

"You knew I was lying" I reply dully.

He snorted and looked at the road, ignoring every stop and yield sign he'd come across.

"So I guess that's 'cause ya pissed at me?"

I shrugged and licked over my lips. "I suppose I am"

Closing my book I looked straight ahead. Keeping my voice and temper leveled.

"How is that, I ain't known you a week yet and y'mad at me already?"

I roll my eyes.

"Tends to happen to someone who _marks_ girls he wants to have sex with"

I looked over at him to see him smirking.

"So that's what you're so pissed about?"

"Yes, that's disgusting Billy"

"Ya'know any other chick in this neighborhood would be throwin' themselves at me right about now. But not you" he says matter of factly looking at me intently.

"Please. And I'm supposed to be naive and believe tha-"

He shakes his head no.

"Why d'you act like you know me?" He asks still looking at the street.

"I know guys like you" I retort arrogantly, folding my arms over my chest.

"But you don't" he replies as if to say there's no one like him. Which I guess is true.

"So we're both wrong hunh? You're assuming I'm this innocent-" I say as I see we're getting closer to my apartment.

"I live there"

"I'm not assumin' a damn thing. I do know that most girls don't throw down a shot a'50 proof vodka like it's juice without some baggage"

Damn he remembered that. We came to a stop and I pulled the seatbelt off quickly. I chose to ignore his observation, my drinking was not of importance at this moment. But then again...

"So what, I'm not like most people, but that doesn't give you the right to treat me like property"

I couldn't dare look him in the eye. Not while I'm talking to him like this. I'd probably piss myself with those piercing blue eyes. I wouldn't dare…

I stared down at the cover of my book, tracing the gold printed letters, Bag of Bones.

He didn't say anything for a long time and didn't until I glanced up at him.

"I ain't apologizin' for that, I am for pissin' you off though" he replies as if that were an actual apology. He's obviously had plenty of practice at saying he was sorry without actually saying he was.

Snorting I shake my head and can't help but smile.

"That was thee worst apology ever"

He grins and my eyes wander across his entire face quickly.

I looked down at my hands and clear my throat.

"Thanks for the ride" I started to gather my things when he asks before I could get out.

"You hungry?"

I stopped and gazed back at him with a raised brow, he does the same.

"It's like two thirty" I say glancing down at the kiddie wrist watch I took from one of the kids meals. And I hadn't eaten all day in fact. I chose not to consume the little bit of shit they allow us to take at work, and didn't have money to spend for anything else.

"I know a place" he says instantly.

My hand was on the door and if I was smart I'd have declined.

I looked up at the building and the darkened apartment wasn't the least bit appealing. My mother would be home so I didn't have to check on my brother. His offer was gleaming brighter and brighter in my mind.

I sat back in the leather seat with a sigh.

"I took karate for 3 years Darley, and I have pepper spray"

He chuckled as he took his car out of park.

"Ohh I'm fuckin' terrified"

Sarcasm never sounded so sexy.

Turns out the place was a small 24 hour diner right on the border of north and south side. I visibly relaxed when I saw we weren't the only ones in the restaurant. I don't know what I'd do had it been just the two of us.

And speaking if just the two of us, is this a date? I wanted to ask so bad. I normally would, not that I go on many dates but if I did I wouldn't be this deathly afraid to ask.

"You always think that hard?" I released my furrowed brows and looked up at Billy from the table we shared. I instantly blushed and looked back down.

"No, I mean...maybe. I dunno" I shrug as he chuckles. Someone please shoot me.

I looked away for something to hold my attention. Ah! A menu!

I picked up the long leather booklet and flip through the laminated pages.

Things were so much simpler talking to him at the bar, and in his car. As simple and stupid as it sounds we were both facing forward. In this small two seated booth where our knees were to inevitably touch I couldn't look away.

"Whatchu thinkin' bout?" his voice lowered and I look over the top of the menu to see him leaning a bit closer. I stare at him not speaking a word.

"Me?" he asks.

I blush so hard it felt like my cheeks were over a flame. To hide this embarrassment I duck my face behind the menu and can't help but burst out laughing. He snorts out a laugh and pulled the menu down to see my face.

"Don't hide-" whatever else he was going to say was cut off by a woman beside us. Billy flashes me a sexy smile, biting his bottom lip after he licked them both and looked up at the woman.

"Ain't seen you in a while Billy" the middle aged woman with hips as wide as the table says smacking on some gum. She glanced at me quickly and did sort of a double take and raising her brows.

"Yea been busy-lemme get a cheeseburger an' a coke"

'No ice' they both say at the same time, and he nods to me.

"The same with fries, and a sprite with ice"

She nods as she jots down our orders quickly and walks away.

When she was gone, having taken the only defense I had with her-my menu I notice Billy staring at me yet again with this oddly impressed look.

"Uhh Billy how old are you?" I ask.

He bites his bottom lip and replies "27"

I simply nod and hum.

He looked his age to me, but definitely looked like he had a rough life. I was in my own world again when I noticed he was staring at me. That curious stare again like he did at the bar.

"It's really off putting when you do that" I mutter playing with a stray packet of sugar.

"Why's that?" he asks, his voice running shivers down my spine.

"B-because I know there's something you're thinkin' about me"

"What am I thinking?" he asks

"That's the off putting part. Whether or not you're noticing what color my eyes are or if it's me that smells like fries and vomit"

He laughs again and I can tell he doesn't do it often. He seems to catch himself every time and cut it short.

It's one of those rare moments where I can look at him for more than 5 seconds at the same time he's looking at me.

"You smell like..." he leans close to me over the table and I inhale a sharp breath completely frozen. He sniffed me and quickly and exhaled slowly. His breath blowing deliciously against my neck. I couldn't help my eyes closing and my lip getting stuck between my teeth.

As he sat back in his seat he said.

"Vanilla today"

I'd sprayed a ton of it on me after work on my way to the bus station.

The waitress comes back and I break my gaze away from him. Thanking her as she placed my drink in front of me.

"Food'll be out in a minute" she says switching away.

I took the straw she handed me and ripped it open, sticking it in my glass. I kept my eyes down on the fizzling drink trying yet again to slow my heart as I took pull after pull of the soda. My arms folded against the table like a child.

"And your eyes are green"

I stopped drinking and my eyes snapped up to his.


	7. Jealousy

"You awake?" my mother whispers from the door.

I turned to face her and nod with a slight smile. She walked over to my bed almost instantly as if those two simple gestures meant the world more. I knew exactly what she was thinking.

"Ma I'm fine. It's not what you think" I chuckle as she sat next to me on the edge of the bed.

"Why are you still in bed then, are you sure you don't want to see the-"

"I just woke up, and I was just thinking-I wasn't paying attention"

She grasped my face and made me look her in the eye. Though this couldn't be medically proven, whenever something is up with me she does this. And in a matter of seconds she can tell, I still have yet to figure out how or what it is she sees when she does.

"Hmm" she says as her sign of approval.

"What were you thinking about?" she asks standing up and dragging her slipper covered feet back to the door. Her long curly hair swaying as she did.

I couldn't possibly tell her what I was thinking about. My mother would kill me. She'd already given me a two day lecture after Jase let the incident from a couple weeks ago slip up.

She bought home a pregnancy test and a drug test. To make sure I wasn't carrying his kid or doing his drugs. I guess I can't blame her, most parents around here know if their kids name is ever in the same sentence as Billy Darley's that something's wrong. But after I explained that he's just someone I know and see around she backed off. A little. She still questions the hell out of me at every turn. And I felt kind of bad for lying again.

I wish I could tell someone what I was thinking though. Tia would only tell Joe who would tell Billy who would then know exactly what I was thinking of him and when. Which was a hell of a lot more than I care to admit to anyone.

"Nothing in particular, I've been off the medication for almost a year" I shrug.

She turns around and a genuine smile crosses the tired woman's face.

"Has it been that long already?" she asks.

I nod, "In a few days, yea"

Her smile grows and I can't lie, I feel like a million big ones.

"I'm proud of you, nena"

I smiled back and replied, "Thanks"

With that she continued out of the room, telling me to come eat breakfast.

After we all ate I got dressed for the day and headed out. I told my mother I was running a few errands with Tia which was true. But I however didn't tell her after Tia was dropping me off to meet my new friend.

It's been about a month since the diner. And since then Billy and I have been keeping in touch. Through Tia of course we arrange days and times to hang out. Which mostly consist of him picking me up from work and picking up food. Some weekends I'd hung out at the bar with him for a few hours. Somewhere in that time the tremendous fear I felt melted away. He made it quite easy actually; plus I never pissed him off too bad.

However I'm not sure though how to label this. I'm not sure if I want to. Even though he's said he has this profound interest in me it doesn't change the fact that he's Billy Darley. I've heard all kinds of rumors, especially those pertaining to his behavior toward the opposite sex.

Even as I wander through the front doors of his favorite place to hang out decked out in the best of my most comfortable garb; dark washed jeans and a form fitting t-shirt, I can't help but fall victim to my doubts.

"Ahh! The princess of the muts has arrived!" Bodie exclaimed as I joined them all in the back. It was more or less normal, I wasn't nearly as timid or intimidated by them as I was the first night I came here.

I roll my eyes and politely say hello to everyone as I always did. It wasn't unnoticed, Bodies distaste for me being around. Simply because he has a bit of a crush on me. Which I find odd, I can't get a cute guy on the bus to notice me. But let me hang around a group of criminals to get some damned acknowledgement.

I sat down in the seat beside Billy's, only Baggy and Tommy were here with Bodie. Which meant everyone else was working, something I will never know anything about. Something I don't want to know about.

"Where's Billy?" I ask

"On his way, you want a drink?" he asks drinking a beer.

I shake my head no, it was the middle of the day, bad idea.

"I have to work later"

"You can hold your liquor can't you?"

"I can, doesn't mean I have to drink every chance I get" those days are over.

"Mmmh" he nods staring at me as he continued to drink. I rolled my eyes and looked elsewhere.

5 minutes later Billy strolled inside. He didn't look happy-well then again he never does so I'll say he just looked pissed. More pissed than I've had the pleasure of coming across.

He didn't even sit down at first he walked over to Tommy, snatched his shot and took it back quickly.

"You alright dog?" Bodie asked as Billy wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and plopped down in his chair with a hard sigh.

He didn't respond to Bodie but looked back at the bartender and with a nod requested a bottle of Jack Daniels.

I watched with a raised brow as he went through his coat, probably looking for a cigarette.

"You got a cigarette?" he asks nodding to me.

I shook my head no and furrowed my brows.

"When have you ever seen me smoke?" I reply.

I was almost certain I could get away with talking to him in ways he didn't let many people. Until today. All of the getting away I was going to get surpassed this moment. The look he gave me, staring dead in my eyes and sneering was one I've never gotten.

"Don't get smart" he grouses as Bodie passes him a cigarette and lighter.

I stared confused at him and opened my mouth to ask what his problem was when the barmaid walked over. She was too pretty honestly to work here, but I guess she liked it. You could tell she did from the way she switched her hips and flipped her hair. Smiling at everyone like she was in love with them. Especially Billy.

She spread out shot glasses for everyone and I pushed mine back.

Her eyes flickered to me and I could clearly see this look of disapproval.

Oh but of course she would, I don't belong here anyway. No I mean I really don't. This is no good for me.

As she walked away, making sure to poke her ass out farther than needed I notice Billy's eyes float right with it. He looked back at Bodie and they exchanged a look, a smile. Some kind of code I knew meant one thing.

My insides were boiling by now, I was angry and mostly hurt. But I wouldn't dare let him see it, or at least I was gonna try hard as shit not to.

He caught me staring at him and asked, "What?" gruffly as he poured his shot and passed the bottle on.

I grinned and shook my head, "Nothing, s'just...she has a nice ass" I shrug. Those close enough to hear me, Bodie and Heco tried to cover their laughs but failed. I held Billy's eyes for a moment ignoring the irritated glare before I turned back to the wall across the way that interested me so. Folding my arms across my chest which was the age old way of telling whether or not a girl was pissed off.

I'm not though, as far as Billy will ever know considering the fact that this is the last time we'll be "hanging out"; this evening is just wonderful for me.

/

Everyone was taking shots, having a good ole time but me. I was as per usual in my head. Billy seemed to get in a progressively better mood. Although it was directed to everyone but me. Which was one of the main arguments I was currently having in my head. What did I even do?

When my brain was becoming too much to handle and I was getting sick of hearing about their mouths I stood up. Since I was again caught in a corner next to the wall I looked over at Bodie and asked if he'd move.

"Don't" Billy says before Bodie can do anything. "Where you goin'?" he asks

When I realized Bodie wouldn't move I pushed the chair back and got on my hands and knees. Crawling beneath the table until I came out on the other side. I wiped my jeans and pulled hair from my mouth as I stood up.

"The bar" I answer digging in my pocket for a hair tie. To think I actually did my hair for that turd. As I pulled my hair in a bun I walked over to the bar where my friend Sammy was wiping down the table.

Politely smiling at him I say.

"Hola"

He smiles back saying the same.

"How are you?" he asks in Spanish as always when I talk to him.

"Okay, kind of...I don't know" I shrug

He glances at Billy who is looking at us.

"Don't let him get you down pretty girl"

I smiled at him and nodded, "I'll try"

I stayed up front for another half hour maybe drinking free sodas back and forth. Every once in a while I'd look over at Billy. Sometimes he'd be looking back and most of the time he was chatting it up with the barmaid who Sammy, would complain about all the time.

"Lazy cow" he grunted in English making me burst out laughing.

He smiled at me and shook his head, "You want a job?"

I shook my head no, "I don't need to work near alcohol, I'd be dead in two weeks" I joked. But I could see it in his eyes, he knew there was some truth to that statement. He nodded and looked at the girl, exclaiming for her to come over.

When she walked over, again Billy's eyes followed her ass. It was inevitable that he'd meet eyes with mine. As Sammy and his employee argued over her leaving early I notice Billy strolling toward us.

I turned my head to the opposite side only to have him come stand directly in front of me.

He eyed me for a while before he asked.

"You ready?" I nodded and hopped down from the barstool eagerly.

"See you Sammy!" exclaim from the door. I vaguely noticed the girl following behind Billy as we left.

"Bye, and remember lazy cows never prosper!" again I laughed harder than I probably should have making Billy and his date stare at me confused.

I however paid them no mind as I walked out being polite as ever. Holding the door for them and smiling as they walked out.

Billy ignored it all and whispered something in the girls ear before he unlocked his car which was right in front.

I snorted and followed. "Reese you sit up front" he says making the girl frown. I patted her back and shook my head.

"I'll get in back, it's cool"

She smiled at me as if I was intentionally doing her a solid. I was how honestly trying to sate my anger.

Before Billy could argue and before I could see that look on his face I pushed the passenger seat forward and crawled in back.

That however didn't change a thing. What I didn't take into account was the rearview mirror. I caught him several times eyeing me through it.

"What did Sammy say?" he asks at the first light.

I glanced at him and sighed before I looked back out the window.

"Nothing"

He didn't have a chance to say anything else before barmaid Barbie interjected.

"I wish I knew Spanish, are you a Mexican?"

Normally I would have had a smart comeback but I didn't even feel like trying. I shake my head no, not caring if she saw me or not. Not paying the least bit of attention to her asking what I was after that.

"She's Cuban" Billy grouses.

Again he looked at me through the mirror but I completely disregarded it. We stopped in front of some unfamiliar house and I looked up front to see Barmaid staring confused at Billy. We both were, I was certain he was taking her to his place.

"Bye Hannah" he says staring at the street. She looked back at me and rolled her eyes before she made a dramatic departing from the car. I eyed Billy for a moment until he looked back at me.

"Come up here"

I didn't argue and crawled up to the front and ignored his stare.

"You wanna go get some foo-"

"No." I cut him off "Just drop me off" Oddly enough he didn't say a thing and simply took off in the direction of my house, even if it did take five minutes longer than usual to get back to my apartment. I'm not sure when this all happened but Billy was suddenly the most legal driver behind the wheel. He was following every driving regulation in the book.

When we were outside the building he didn't unlock the doors so I stayed still, silently waiting for him to do so.

"What's wrong wit'you?" he asks gruffly.

I shake my head instantly knowing he knew I was lying.

"Don't say nothin' y'mad at me...again"

"Even if I was it wouldn't matt-" I sighed and pulled in the door handle.

"Would you let me out I'm tired"

"No, I won't until you tell me what's wrong"

I rolll my eyes.

"If you don't know then I _really_ should just go"

"I know, but I want _you_ to tell me"

I sat there in silence, refusing to speak a word. I wouldn't dare give in first.

"I think you got jealous"

My head snapped to his and I instantly denied.

"I definitely didn't, I could care less _who's_ ass you stare at" I spot back vehemently, not doing much of a good job at showing how **not** jealous I was.

He chuckled and brushed his fingers through the hair on his chin.

"You could care less but you noticed"

"Fuck yo-" I started to yell at him fuck you, I don't care what you do! But obviously I didn't get even close to it. He was staring at me with this look, this hungry look and I wished badly to know what he was thinking. Anyway I didn't have time to speak like I said because next thing I know a pair of soft lips are pressed against mine.

A/N: Thank you all for the reviews, keep em coming :) I hope you liked this chapter...


	8. The Plague

**A/N: Sorry this took so long...I promise to update the next chapter sooner. Hope you like it :)**

I was still thinking about that damn kiss. It was literally plaguing me, I found myself thinking about him every couple minutes at this point. If I wasn't actively doing or thinking of something he'd inevitably sneak into my thoughts. Which unfortunately for me was more often than not.

Therefore, more often than not I was constantly reminding myself of how soft his lips were. How despite his looks and persona, despite his sailor mouth and all the liquor he could drink and cigarettes he could smoke his kiss was...as cliche as it sounds, filled with passion. I could feel myself breaking down for him, and worrying about whether or not that was a good thing. Something I seem to do a lot these days.

I was grateful when my brother opened my door, shedding some light on my dimly lit room. The house smelled like laundry detergent and the signature Spanish cooking of a Latino American home.

"Ma said wash the dishes" he skipped away in nothing but his batman boxers. Normally I'd be just as annoyed as anyone else but I found it a pleasant distraction. But yet again, he creeped up in my mind like a ninja or something. I didn't even realize it, here I am joyfully cleaning a greasy pot when I found myself wondering if he'd ever had a kiss as satisfying as he gave me. Also how was the kiss for hi-.

"Goddamit!" I hiss to myself stomping my foot, thoughts in check Reese!

"Que pasa?" my mother asks as she mixes something over the stove.

I glance at her and burn red, "N-nothin'"

Liar liar, pants on fire.

Instead of tucking myself in my room I decided to lay in my mothers bed with my brother after dinner. Where we ceremoniously watched AFV, and our sitcoms of choice for the night.

Admittedly I have a better time doing this than going out most days. Like a big doofus with my head in my mothers lap while she rubbed my hair. My brothers head on her shoulder drifting in and out of sleep.

Around 12 o clock when my mother was too sleep and snoring hard the phone rang. We had two phones in the house one in my mothers room and another in the living room.

I stared at the caller I.D in question, knowing it wasn't a bill collector I took the chance and answered it.

"Hello?"

There was shuffling on the other end and I was about to hang up when I heard a familiar voice curse.

"Shit, hello?"

I sat up from the bed and furrowed my brows.

"Who's this?" I ask even though I already knew.

"Who you think?" he retorts.

I grew a smile so big I couldn't see. Standing up from the bed I held the phone between my ear and shoulder.

"Hold on for two seconds please" I say and put it face down at the edge of the bed when he said okay. Quickly, with my chest thumping fast I tucked my mother and brother into bed, kissing both their cheeks.

I turned the TV off and grabbed the phone, and giddy as ever tip toed as fast as I could. When I was on my bed and caught my breath, fixing my hair stupidly I folded my legs Indian style and put the phone back to my ear.

"Hey" I sighed "Sorry about that"

"S'cool, you were sleep?"

"No, I had to put my brother to bed, I was awake" I rush out.

In the background on his end I could hear the rush of the neighborhood at night.

"Oh...well can you get outta there tonight?" he asks.

My eyes rolled behind my head, smiling still.

"No, why?"

He sighed, "'Cause I'm fuckin' bored and starvin'"

The thought of sneaking out occurred, to say screw work and spend the wee hours of the morning gallivanting the streets with him.

"Sorry, I can't...I have to work tomorrow-" before he got the wrong idea I quickly added, cutting off my next breath. "But I can talk"

He chuckled and my cheeks turned red, yes even through the phone.

"What's so funny?" I ask bringing my legs up to my chest and resting my chin against my knee.

"You, so why you up so late if you gotta work tomorrow"

"I dunno, just not tired yet. What about you, where're you?"

"Out" he replies stiffly and I know instantly what that means.

I didn't say anything, not knowing what to say. And for fear of that awkward moment I spat out words I couldn't really take back.

"I'll make you dinner sometime to make up for it"

I smacked my forehead the moment I said it. And what the fuck am I even making up to him anyway?

"You cook?" he asks

"I do, very well if I do say so myself"

He snorts and says, "You can't cook"

"Yes I can!" I laugh

"Yea right, I'll believe that when I see it"

I giggled girly like, "Can you cook?"

"What the fuck would I need t'do that for? That's what you're for"

"Wow, nice Billy...sexist much?" I chuckle.

"Don't tell me you're one of those feminist bull dikes"

My jaw dropped and I reply smoothly, "Well I was very into the Spice Girls"

He did that laugh again, like he completely forgot himself. I can't say I didn't like it.

"You're so fuckin' weird"

Grinning I thank him and add, "I'm serious though, I'll cook you some chicken and rice the way my mother makes, with plantanos" I said excitedly.

"Planta-what?" he asks sounding disgusted.

"It's like a banana but it's not. It's really good"

"Whatever I'll hold you to that...ayy I every told you I like when you speak Spanish?"

I get it, he plans on destroying my poor heart tonight, burning holes through my cheeks.

"N-no, I don't think so"

I buried my face between my legs as if he could see me.

"Well I do, it's sexy"

I removed the phone from my ear and covered my mouth from the bursting giggles that erupted.

"Is it now?" I chuckle.

"Mmhmm, say somethin'"

I licked over my lips and thought for a moment.

"Uhh, Billy es alto, tiene un montón de tatuajes, y muy bonitos ojos"

"What does that mean?" He sounded pleased I guess.

I hesitated,"I said...I said Billy is tall, has a lot of tattoos and very pretty eyes"

He chuckles, "What's daddy mean, papi right?"

I roll my eyes knowing already where he was going with this.

"Yes it does" I sigh

"Now just say my papi before Billy-"

"I won't!" I cut him off laughing as he did. "God, how did I know you'd be all perverted?"

"'Cause you're probably just as perverted and nasty as me"

My eyes widen and I feel my heart beat harder.

"I doubt that"

Despite what people think, I'm very much an innocent girl, seriously innocent in every sense of the word.

"Don't lie t'papi"

I again moved the phone from my ear but laid on my back taking a few deep breaths.

"Billy" I said in a warning tone.

"I'm fuckin' wit'you" a statement I believed to be half true. "What I would fuckin' give to see your face, how long you been blushin'?"

Rubbing my eyes furiously I retort, "Go. To. Hell"

Can you believe we stayed on the phone until 3 in the morning. I could lie and say I wasn't tired but I was dog tired and smacked myself several times to stay awake. We laughed and actually talked, I asked him things about himself even though most of my questions I could tell were pushing boundaries. Boundaries that for other people seem meaningless and vapid but for Billy were far too much to tell on our first phone date. Yes that's what I'm calling it.

He asked me about my family, about my brother and mother. And why, like so many of us depraved children of the ghetto, did I not have a father. He didn't seem really surprised when I said drugs.

Toward the end of the conversation when I started to fall asleep on the phone he made me hang up, saying we'd talk soon. Even half sleep my stomach did flips.

Work the next day was utter hell. I didn't even eat lunch, I sat at one of the empty booths and went straight to sleep, a few of my co-workers sat with me so Mort didn't find a reason to write me up.

I wanted badly to just leave and take the rest of the day off, but I need the money. So after my nap I sucked down a large coke to keep me wired.

I guess I crashed earlier than expected because next thing I know someone snaps their fingers in my face. I jumped up and opened my eyes instantly, looking around to see if Mort was around.

He wasn't and I looked forward at the customer. Or Billy, then gasp.

"What are you doing-"

"Cashin' in ya proposal" he says tapping his fingers against the desk to no specific beat.

"My proposal?"

"Yea...I'm havin' a little get together on Friday, but I want you to c'mover and cook me dinner before"

"Fine" I yawn covering my mouth.

He stared at me intently.

"Told you, you shoulda went to sleep earlier"

"Yea yea, so do you want something?" I ask cranky as ever.

"Nah, where's ya boss?" he asks looking in back.

I shrugged and yawned again.

Next thing I know he's calling out to Mort who wasn't far away from me.

"Billy, stop it!" I exclaim looking back at Mort cautiously.

But as he walked over he seemed even more scared than I was of losing my job. Billy smirked devilishly and said to Mort as if he knew him.

"She's leavin' early-"

"I'm not, Billy stop bullyi-"

He cut me off, my boss who I've always known as this uptight insane person, who was staring at Billy with wide eyes said.

"It's fine Reese, you can go"

He continued to look at Billy before he asked, "We're okay right?"

My eyes bulged from my head as Billy shrugs and retorts, "For now"

In his car I stared at him with the same look. Before he started the car I ask. "So he buys from you?" it was obvious.

We're okay right? Meant he most likely owes Billy money. I usually pride myself in being able to tell the users and abusers around here, then again there are those who hide it well, functioning like it was nothing.

As he peeled from the sidewalk he glanced at me with a hard look. I never bring up his "work" for obvious reasons.

"Used to" is all I got.

I remained quiet for the rest of the ride. Not even asking again where we were driving.

"What are we doing here?" I ask looking around outside. We were on the north-side in the district area parked next to a park.

"I need to see somebody"

"This isn't a-" I began, he must've known what I was thinking before I even asked.

"No" he cut me off.

I yawned when I was going to ask why he bought me along.

"I'll take you home after, go to sleep."

Sleep sounded amazing, I looked in back and didn't feel like having to curl my long legs. Instead I rested my head against the window and preparing to let the radio take me to sleep.

Before I could get comfortable I felt an arm wrap around my waist. I gasped as Billy pulled me across the car and up against his chest. How'd he expect me to sleep with my heart in my fucking throat!

Damn him.

Feeling how tense I was he tightened his arm around me and whispered.

"Relax"

I took a deep breath realizing that suddenly I wasn't tired. Either I wasn't or now I was just too distracted.

My eyes land on the silver cross resting on his black button up. Not bothering to restrain myself I moved my hand to it.

I felt his breath on my forehead and looked up into his eyes to see him staring down at me. I couldn't move, didn't want to and prayed he'd make the first move yet again.

My eyes flickered away when he didn't say or do anything for several seconds. Disrupting the silence I continue to play with the cross.

"Why did you uhh, kiss me the other day?"

My body leaped and thumped when he, not speaking a word lifted my head and kissed me softly. I clutched his shirt and kissed back this time. I wasn't as surprised as last time which gave me time to react and figure out that I wanted the feeling to last longer.

This time though, he pulled away still holding my chin between his index finger and thumb.

His pink lips looked more appealing than ever and I leaned forward, kissing him again. He didn't stop me this time but continued kissing me until I was out of breath.

Burying my face against his chest I breathed deep. His hands gripped my waist and he pulled me in his lap. I blushed as my legs were folded on either side of his thighs. My back pressed up lightly against the steering wheel.

"Look at me" he said with a smile in his voice.

When I did he brushed hair back behind my ear and his hand rested against my neck, sending chills everywhere. His eyes stared straight into mine.

"I don't share"

**A/N: Go review, needs the encouragement.**


	9. Lay Down

My shoes crunched against discarded peanuts shells and sloshed over spots of spilled liquor no one bothered cleaning up. It's gross, repulsive even, but I can't really complain. After all it is me that's taking the time out of what's supposed to be the end of my day to go home, shower, and change then bring myself over here.

It's not very far, but still out of the way. Everyone here has been convicted or accused of a crime at least once. A day with only one chair being thrown across the room is a good day. This is absolutely no place for a young lady, it's no place for _any _respectable person. And every time I wander through the front door of this god forsaken bar I wonder what the hell possesses me to put myself through the fouls smells and genuine lack of manners coming from the patrons of this damn place.

I walk through the entire front of the bar thinking this, that is until I get to the back. Until I see him. He always receives a nod from whichever of his flunky's notices I'm here first. Then he looks over his shoulder briefly, pretending he isn't more than delighted to see me.

But today he didn't look back at me because no one was there, he sat by himself smoking a cigarette.

"Hi" I mutter unsure of what to think as I make my way to stand behind him.

He glances at me, but I can only see a look of complete annoyance on his features. He gives me a nod and I raise a brow and watching him intently.

"What's up?" I ask pulling out the chair to sit beside him.

He doesn't say anything, doesn't look at me but focuses more on inhaling his nicotine. I stare at him unwavering, using my new found confidence that grew with all the time we've been around each other. Eventually he removes the cigarette from his lips and blows out the toxic smoke in the opposite direction of my face.

"You shouldn't_ah_ come here today".

"Why? You didn't say anything last night," I say furrowing my brows.

"Yea, and if you had a fuckin' phone I'd'a told ya".

"You want me to leave then?" I ask confused and annoyed myself now, his attitude is fucking lethal.

I never really am on the receiving end of one of his moods, but usually just wind up within the blast radius of it, like most people.

When he doesn't say anything I put my hand on the table to push myself up. I'm on my feet and about to step away he grasps my hand.

"Billy it's fine, I'm tired anyway," I sigh looking at the ceiling, my frustration bubbling over.

"Sit, I need t'talk to you".

"What about?" I ask looking down at him. He blinks at me with that arrogant look, and in that one expression I can tell he knew that we both knew I was staying whether he told me what he wanted to talk about or not.

I sit down with more of an attitude than I had before, simply because I couldn't win with him. He scratches his hairy chin with his thumb and takes another pull from his cigarette. I stare at the cigarette in silence, remembering the days when I couldn't go without a pack a day.

"I uh" he stops his thought and chuckles darkly, shaking his head, as if he couldn't believe whatever he was meant to be saying.

"Is y'mother home tonight?" he asks. It usually matters when he asks, the nights she has to do double shifts I can't stay out with him all hours of the morning. On the nights she isn't home I have to be home before 9 to look after Jase, Billy knows all of this.

I think about it for a moment, today is Monday, "No, why?" I press.

He nods and licks his lips, after another minute he begins his earlier thought again, "I can't go t'my place t'night".

I raise both brows in surprise, "Why?" I exclaim.

He gives me that look that says, '_Why do you even ask?'_

I swallow a nervous lump in my throat, I already know what he's asking, or isn't asking for that matter. Because god forbid Billy ask anybody for anything. He'd rather suggest it subliminally and stare at you with those piercing damn eyes until you cave. Fuck, I'm in trouble.

"And I can't stay at none of those _fucks_ places, too obvious".

Too obvious to who and what? I want to ask so badly, but I'll just get the look again. All I'm meant to know at this point is whoever the person or people are looking for Billy are looking for his friends as well and knows where they all live.

"Okay". I reply with a nod. He squints his eyes at me and gives me a questioning look.

"Okay, what?"

"Okay you can stay the night. But you have to come after 9. Jase will be sleep by then."

He smirks, using the expression to suppress a bigger smile, tilting his head to the side as he studies me.

"Hmph," he huffs still smirking at me.

"What? Did you expect me to say no?" I ask.

He shrugs, "I never fuckin' know what t'expect from ya Reese".

I smile and look away from his gaze, "I guess that's a good thing then".

I stand up again and put my hand on his shoulder, kneeling down a bit so I can place a kiss on his cheek. He never kisses me here. Well, not where any one, including his "friends" can see. But since no one is here I figured what the hell?

"I'll call you later" I say close to his ear.

He grasps my arm and looks up at me confused, "Where you goin'?"

"I need to clean up and cook dinner tonight".

He nods and bites the inside of his lip.

"A'right," he says, though he still doesn't let me go.

"What Billy?" I chuckle.

He yanks me closer almost roughly and I have to brace myself on the table. He pinches my chin with his other hand and lays a wet smack of a kiss to my lips. When I try to kiss him back he pulls away and grins a little.

"G'head," he says nodding to the exit.

I pout and groan leaning forward for another kiss. He does it again, leaning away and turning his head to take another puff from his cigarette.

"Oh you jerk" I snicker fighting a smile.

When I go to step back he pulls me close again and before I can deny him he kisses me much softer than before. But it only lasts a second before he pulls away and lets me go.

"I'll seeya" he huffs.

I turn away, smiling harder than I could control and sighed a quick goodbye before walking out, dodging the beginnings of a brawl on my way.

I get back home around 6:30, finish what my mother started to make for dinner after I scolded her for even doing so. She and I have agreements that have been in place since high school, I think. To make all our lives easier we divide up everything, from chores to bills. It's how we get by.

We're all fed by 7:15, just in time for my mother to leave. She kisses my brother and I goodbye before she's off to her shift at a very decent hotel downtown. I leave Jase to watch his cartoons before it's time for him to go to bed for a quick chat with my dear old friend.

We talked for a few minutes before I dropped the big bomb about Billy staying over. After she screamed for like a minute and a half the first words out of her mouth are, "Do you have condoms".

"No, and I won't need them".

"Serious, Reese, don't be stupid".

"I'm not going to have sex with him, my brother is going to be in the next room. Besides, it's only been like two months," I hiss trying to keep my voice down.

"Yea, in your world that don't seem like a long time, but for him?" she trails off, "I'm honestly surprised he's lasted this long".

"Last long for what? We're not even in a relationship. It shouldn't matter".

"Believe me, it matters. And who says you're not in a relationship?" she asks.

"Who says we are?"

"Billy is never going to come out an' say it, you know that".

"Well he should want to"

"An' besides, who the hell says you have to be in a relationship to fuck?"

"I do" I retort, "I don't sleep around, I'm not saying it's bad if people do...I just chose not to".

"Anymore" she mutters as if I couldn't hear her, "Good luck explaining that to your boyfriend".

He isn't my boyfriend, he's a growing friend that I sometimes kiss and make out with. With the occasional grope fest, it pretty much stays at that. Although, I can't say Tara is all wrong, I have thought about it...sex. While it's not something I've constantly engaged in I do find that I have that constant itch.

The main reason I don't have sex as often as a lot of girls my age is because when I did start having sex it was for all the wrong reasons. When I got my shit in check I realized not only was the sex bad and boring, but meaningless. It was more of a means to distract me, and I don't really know about many people, but it's not supposed to be like that for me. It's been almost 2 years since I gave up that life, and things haven't been better.

While I understand the implications of having Billy spend the night with me, even the implications of even associating with him; but I just simply cannot help it. He is the epitome of everything I don't need. Temptation wrapped up in a devilishly handsome, vulgar, package. God I'm stupid.

**Part II  
><span>**

"Third floor" I say watching as Billy parked the car he borrowed from a "friend" across the street, "Apartment B".

He couldn't very well leave his intimidating muscle car parked in front of my building. It's already suspicious enough when he's driving up and down this block every couple days to drop and pick me up.

My heart is pounding by the time he disappears into the lobby downstairs. I look over my room again, having cleaned and organized every inch even though I'm positive my messiness would have phased him. My bed is made, the floor swept, and every clean article of clothing I'd at some point thrown on the floor or on the dresser was promptly thrown in my closet.

Three hard knocks hit the front door. I peek in my brother's room to make sure he didn't wake up and close the door when I see he hasn't even stirred a little.

"H-hi" I say when the door is open and I'm peering up at Billy.

He smirks and mumbles, "Ay".

I step to the side and let him in. His dominating presence is so odd in my living room, there hasn't been a man in here over 4 feet tall in I don't know how long. As I shut and lock the door, I look over my shoulder to see him looking around the place.

"Where's the little runt" he says speaking of my brother. Billy finds it hilarious that my brother is infatuated with him and makes up stories about him. Like he's some kind of god damned legend.

"Sleep, my room's right there" I say pointing down the hall to the right of the apartment.

He nods to the room and says, "Show me".

I bite my lip- that changed things for some reason. Like I'm some virginal maiden showing a man to my bedroom for the first time. But nonetheless I reach out and grab his hand, guiding him to my room with my stomach in my throat.

We're met with the scent of my vanilla candle that I'd blew out immediately before he got here.

Billy chuckles as we enter, "You didn't hafta clean for me".

I shake my head, "No I'm a slob, and no one should ever see what I do to this room".

I let his hand go and shut my door. He stands in the middle of my just recently re-furnished room. When I had enough money I made it exactly how I wanted for the longest.

"Cute" Billy mutters sarcastically as he glances at a picture of me and my family on the dresser where my TV was.

"Shut up". I sigh leaning on the door.

Once he's inspected every corner he shrugs off his jacket and tosses it on the side of my bed carelessly before sitting on the side of it. Seeing me standing there awkwardly, not moving not speaking he pats the empty space beside him.

"C'mere".

I inhale deeply and make my way over to the bed, as we sit side by side, me looking at my twiddling fingers and him gazing at me with a mischievous smirk on his face I start to count backwards from 10.

"Why you so nervous?" he asks reaching out to put his big hand on my thigh.

I can't possibly look at him now, "I-I..." I can't speak apparently, so I settle for a shrug.

"Relax, Reese. I didn't c'mere for _that_".

I clear my throat and work up the nerve to look at him. He squeezes my knee and leans over to peck my cheek. A very charming gesture for him.

Smiling I reply, "Okay".

He moves his arm behind me and curls it around my waist.

"Gi'me a kiss." he grouses lowly making a shiver wreck my spine.

He's never really asked…or told me to give him a kiss. He usually just takes it.

My eyes flicker to and fro his mouth and eyes once before I lean in and kiss him. He deepens the kiss, bringing his right hand up to hold the side of my face. Gripping his elbow I lose myself in his kiss, not noticing until later that I'd moved closer to him until we were turned chest to chest.

He suddenly yanks me closer so my thighs are on either side of his waist. I avoid sitting in his lap and grip his shoulders as I gasp in surprise. The moment his tongue prods my mouth I pull my head back and sigh heavily,

"What? C'mere" he grouses moving his hands to grip my butt. He yanks me closer and so I'm pressed against him with nowhere to go.

"Billy" I whimper when he rubs his lips against my neck, his scruffy facial hair gently scratching my skin. I shiver again. And without any warning he sucks on the side of my neck before biting roughly.

"Ahh" I whimper, "Don't do that," my left leg shakes involuntarily from the sensation.

He places a kiss where he's bitten and sighs roughly, resting his forehead against my neck.

"Shit Reese".

Smiling I put my hand to the back of his head.  
>"Are you hungry?" I ask trying to steer the mood. It should work, Billy likes his food.<p>

He leans back to look me in the eye.  
>"You cooked?" he asks with raised brows.<p>

I nod, "Chicken, rice, and I believe we have some left over _plantanos,"_ I say putting extra emphasis on my Spanish accent at the last word.

He rubs up and down my hips and torso as he grins at me, "Plan-tuhnos," His heavy accent morphed the word into something only a Boston born and bred person could do.

I laugh and shake my head, "You're such a damn southie".

I slide off his lap and pat his shoulder as I go the door, before I can leave he exclaims, "The fuck that's supposed to mean?"

I simply look over my shoulder and smirk at him. After making and warming up a plate for him probably stocked with more food than I could ever eat. When I returns it's to find that he's made himself comfortable. With his shoes off and stretched along my bed with his arms behind his head.

"Comfortable?" I ask chuckling.

He nods, "Might hafta come over here more often".

"Oh I'd love to see my mother's face when she busts in here one day to find _Billy Darley_ laid up in my bed".

He sits up as I walk over to hand him his plate followed by a fork and napkin.

"She know me?" he asks as he stabs the baked chicken and shovels it into his mouth.

"Who doesn't" I reply.

He forgets all about what we're talking about and groans, his eyes rolling behind his head momentarily. The sound is by far the sexiest I've ever heard. Without taking a breath he shovels rice into his mouth, followed by more chicken and more rice. I just watch with wide eyes. My legs are folded Indian style in the middle of the bed with my head rested on my fist.

"Is it good?" I ask.

He gives a curt nod and continues eating. Forgetting I was holding a can of soda in my hand I bump his arm with it to grab his attention. He glances at it and grumbles, "Open it".

With a couple of sips of soda between he demolishes every inch of the plate, leaving the plantains on the side.

"Shit girl," he exhales putting the plate on my nightstand and sitting back against my headboard with a satisfied grin on his face.

"Good?" I ask.

"Fuckin…I aint had a meal like that in a long time."

"You didn't eat the-."

"They look weird" he replies bluntly shaking his head sternly.

"Oh come on" I grunt moving beside him and reaching over him to take the plate, "I promise you'll like it, they're sweet and good and probably my mother's best".

I cut a small piece with the fork and hold it out to his mouth. He shakes his head no and looks away.

"Just one bite, if you don't like it, I'll let you kiss me anywhere you want". I regretted the proposition the moment I said it. The way his eyes widen and that wolfish, horn-dog, tongue wagging look over takes him.

His eyes are wider than I've ever seen them and his eye brows almost shoot off his forehead.

"What?" he asks stretching out the 'a' in the word.

"You heard me" I reply, "But you can't lie either and pretend it's not good either".

He smiles and bites his lip, "That's fuckin'. That can be the best thing I ever tasted, I promise I'm gonna lie," he says pointing to the plate.

"Fine then". I stand up to take the plate back to the kitchen. Before I can leave he grasps my arm and clears his throat.

"I'll eat it if you let me kiss you wherever I want".

I roll my eyes, I can't even complain, I did this to myself.

"I-that defeats the purpose of the bet".

He shrugs, "You want me to eat em' so bad".

I bite my lip, sure I wanted him to like my food but at what cost. I'm not completely put off by the idea of doing anything sexual with him. I'm more put off by the idea that if I do I know there will be absolutely no turning back.

Sighing I blink and look away from him as I consider the possibilities.

"Fine, I won't get naked though". I retort.

He tosses the idea around in his head, bobbling it from side to side once or twice before a larger more devious smirk replaces his thoughtful disposition.

"A'right".

I can't help but wonder what the hell he's got cooking in that brain of his for him to be okay with my terms. He's found some kind of loophole, I know it…

Without another word I lift the fork to his mouth and he with more fervor than before he wraps his lips around it. I watch intently as he chews and chews, a pleased look on his face until he swallows the fruit.

"You like it." I state.

He licks his lips and nods.  
>"Yea, s'not bad".<p>

"Told you" I reply sitting the plate on the floor and giving him my best, smug, I told you so grin.

He nods, "Yea, yea, but I owe you a kiss now".

I lean close a bit, hoping he'd forgotten about the _anywhere _part and simply took an unhinged kiss for the bargain.

"Nope" he says shaking his head sternly.

"Where then?" I ask.

He glances to my bedroom door and then asks, "Y'got'a lock on the door?"

I raise a brow, "I told you I'm not gettin' naked".

"You don't have to, but you have t'take off those shorts".

"What for?" I exclaim my face getting hot instantly.

"'Cause I said so, s'my kiss aint it?" he asks tilting his head at me.

Dropping my shoulders I sigh, "Yea".

"Go lock the door then," the stern tone in his voice isn't to be missed.

When I return to the bed a nervous wreck from locking myself in with this manipulative heathen he pulls me to the bed and rubs my back.  
>"Calm down, aint nothin' you won't enjoy, I promise".<p>

A promise? Billy doesn't make those.

"Now lay down and take those off".

He stands from my bed and wanders over to the slightly opened windows. Even though it was cold out my bedroom tended to get the most heat so I leave them open whenever I'm here. I can't imagine…actually, I know exactly why he's closing the window and drawing the blinds along with it.

When he turns to face me I'm lying there silently, my hands folded on my stomach as I wait as patiently as I could with how impatient I felt.

I start to lose my breath when he dips his knees into the mattress, making his way closer and closer to me until he's hovering above me. His knees are caging me in along with his arms and I feel paralyzed from the feral look in his eyes.

"One kiss, and if ya'want me to stop, I will. Deal?" he asks having moved his face a hairline away from mine. His lips are just about to touch mine and I can't help but lean forward and take the initiative.

He doesn't kiss me back and I know it's because he's staying within the guidelines of our little bet. But this doesn't stop him from nudging my face with his, another damn loophole.

I pull away and nod, "Deal". The excitement rippling through me has completely overridden any and all hesitation I felt before this.

Biting his lip again, making me shiver he keeps his face close to mine, making me think he's about to kiss me. He does this, travelling further and further down my body. Stopping to nip at my neck and then my slightly exposed stomach, never making it at all easy for me to tell where he'd bite next.

The last bite he places just at my panty line makes me literally jump and whimper. His eyes flicker up to mine and I see them in a way I've never before. They look so much darker, scary almost.

With his teeth only, he bites at my panty line and pulls back so I can see straight down between my legs. His eyes fall to my trimmed peach fuzz. That delicious groan he made while he was eating is emitted and I can't help but gyrate my hips in response.

He lets go of the fabric and grips my hips, forcing me back down on the bed.

"Don't move" he demands not looking up at me again as he sets his sights between my legs.

I move my hand to my collar bone, clutching my skin as I feel and listen to my heart racing.

His open mouth hovers above my second set of lips and the warm air is welcome. I keep my eyes peeled, enraptured with whatever the hell he's going to do. I mean I pretty much know but with Billy you never _really_ know.

He presses the tip of his nose against me and rubs my clothed sex with it up and down and in a circle before inhaling my scent deeply. I can't help but feel self-conscious in the moment and call out his name to make him move this along.

"Shut up" he retorts, his head lolling to the side as he inhales again and lets out another deep groan.

My eyes roll behind my head and I lift my hips again, not very far because he aggressively pushes me back down and pins me to the bed. Just as I open my mouth to whine some more I feel something wet and hard, yet soft at the same time prod my lips from the center all the way up.

"Ah, Billy, fuck" I moan lifting my hips yet again.

He lets me this time as he moves up until his tongue bumps my clit. Without stopping he lets his tongue venture back down and up again. The licking doesn't end there as his wet tongue travels all the way up my middle, over my belly button, my ribs and my breasts until we are face to face again where he places a hard kiss to my lips.

I'm literally writhing beneath him for more, trying to move my hips close to his, but he keeps a fair distance away. I try to pull away from the kiss but he forces me to accept it when all I want to do it rip both our clothes off. Mewling against his mouth I push at his chest in attempt at releasing his mouth from mine.

"Stop" he says against my lips, grabbing my hands and holding them beside my head.

"No, just-"he kisses me again but softer than before, flicking his tongue against my mouth until I accepted that as well. Upon realizing I was getting nowhere I kiss him back with just as much eagerness as he did me.

And after a minute or two he lets the kiss end.

The moment he lets up his grip even a little I push him off me and roll on top of him.

"You are such a fuck" I sigh sitting directly below his chest. I force his arms beneath my knees so he can't move.

The smile on his face lets me know he's enjoying this and isn't ready to end my life.

"I fuckin' kissed ya, how'am I a fuck?"

"You know why, you didn't finish what you started". My brain is literally a fog of hormones and sex.

"You wanna fuck?" he asks straight out, smiling wider.

"Depends" I reply with a shrug.

"On?"

"How good I feel after".

Clenching his jaw he grumbles the way he does and asks, "After what? I want a straight answer."

Smirking I stand up and grip both edges of my panties with my thumbs before shimmying them off and tossing them on the floor somewhere. His darkened eyes travel up and down my body and I have completely lost sight of any thought opposing this…him.

He licks his lips and nods to the space beside him, "Lay down".

**A/n:** Long I know. But I figured I owed you all more than just a chapter after more than a year (or something like that) of not updating. I hope you liked it. I'd also like to thank lauraxxx, she really is the reason for my impromptu updating, and she's a wonderful fan to have and also an amazing writer! *hint hint*.  
>Any who, leave me a review!<p> 


	10. Told You So

***Contains Sexual Content***

It's burning up, sweats pouring down every inch of my body and I try to focus on remaining as quiet as possible. But it's damn hard with a man literally sucking every ounce of energy from my body. I'm near tears, I can barely breathe and my heart is racing a million beats a second.

My bed is soaked smelling of sex and sweat and I can't control myself as I grip my mattress

He won't stop, I'm nothing but a bundle of nerves now, quivering from every touch. He doesn't stop until my face is stuffed in a pillow wailing like a wanton whore beyond any control I may have possessed in my life.

Luckily, Jase is a very heavy sleeper.

"Bih-Billy, oh my god".

He is a master of the art, and I mean, seriously, this man's tongue should be insured. It's scary how almost hours ago I was planning on telling him how much I liked being around him and didn't want sex to be an issue. I'm so glad we didn't get to that point because god damn this boy is fucking incredible.

One of my hands move to the back of his head and I immediately snatch it away to lay a few blows against the mattress when his tongue penetrates me repeatedly until I feel that flutter in the pit of my stomach dancing around, making my breath hitch when I feel it.

"Guh! Fuck!" I cry out arching my back when he goes back to sucking my clit and replacing his tongue with his fingers. With as much force as he has he curves his fingers up over and over until I explode both mentally and physically.

My whole body is quivering and I barely have time to recuperate when I feel him hovering directly above me, panting a little and fumbling around with a condom.

After a moment he lifts my legs around his brawny arms and yanks my limp body closer so the backs of my thighs are rested on the tops of his. I choke on a gasp when he, without warning slides inside of me. He does it roughly and I have to literally bite my lip to keep from screaming. Pressing my fingertips against his stomach I whimper loudly, wincing from the pain.

"Slow, fuck I ca-can't" I gasp when he finally stops moving.

He grasps my hand and pushes it away, smirking like the devil himself he looks me in the eye and I can tell it feels much better for him than it does me.

My torso twists to the side and I grab a pillow, bringing the material to my mouth, biting it harshly as he grazes the spot he'd just been stimulating aggressively a second ago.

With my eyes squeezed shut I try to take deep breaths as he starts moving slowly, but harshly, his rough hands rubbing up my hips until he reaches my waist, pinning me to the mattress and using this advantage to go at whatever pace he wanted. Though he was definitely the dominant type and definitely sought after his pleasure, one thing I can say is he never once…so far…let it fog up my need for the same thing.

Contrary to any previous belief of mine, Billy is generous. Especially with that mouth…  
>Though he'll never really admit it and I doubt we'll have deep conversations about what he likes about sex, I can tell he gets off on giving almost as much as he does receiving.<p>

"Fuck" he grunts wrapping his arms completely around my waist as his pelvis digs deeper into mine. His lips latch onto my neck as he smothers my body with his much bulkier form.

"Slow down Billy, I'm gonn-a-" my sentence is chopped in half by a rather forceful jolt of his hips. My nails clamp onto his back and my head curls back into my pillow. That instant surge of overwhelming pleasure overtakes me and I can't think straight. My mouth falls open and I can't stop the series of moans and sighs of release that leave it. Before we can wake my brother, Billy clamps his hand over my mouth and gives a few last fleeting thrusts before the tension became too much for him. And in that same moment his phone, which he placed on my nightstand earlier begins to ring.

We both glance at it then at each other. I half expect him to just stand up and get dressed. But he places a wet kiss to my lips and starts to ram his hips harder and faster, forcing an orgasm out of himself so quickly it made my head spin.

And just as quickly as it happened it was over.

He let his body rest atop mine for 45 seconds tops. And in no time at all I was old news. The moment his brain was no longer a pile of mush behind his eyes he was laying on his back, phone glued to his ear as he took short labored breaths wiping his hand over his face to remove all the sweat.

Still panting like I'd just run a mile I wipe sweat from my forehead and look over at him with a blank expression. Realization washes over me instantly, I just had sex with Billy Darley…I repeat this like a mantra over and over until all the fused together letters made no sense at all.

"What?" he grouses, speaking to whoever was on the other line. He reaches across the bed and grasps my arm, yanking me across the space between us so our sweaty bodies are molded together.

"Don't worry about where the fuck I am. What'ya want?"

I sit up so my chin is pressed against his peck as I watch his face while he talks. He eyes me for a moment and his furrowed brow loosens as hand moves down to my bare ass, half grinning while he squeezes.

"I told Joe t'fuckin' do it!" he says very lowly, his voice only needing to lose a half an octave to sound menacing and threatening.

"So why the fuck'a you there fo-," he cuts himself off breathing harshly from his nose.  
>"Stay there," he says through clenched teeth before hanging up on the person.<p>

"Gotta go" he grumbles still fondling my body, remaining completely still.

I nod and sit up holding my weight on my left elbow, "I heard."

He stares up at me, his blue eyes burning through me. I watch them trail down my naked form and before he moves his hand up my side and toward my breast. He rubs the backs of his fingers up and down my erect nipple. Trying to ignore the lustful ache he causes I ask.

"Is it really bad?" knowing he wouldn't actually answer me.

And true to his form he continues what he's doing as if I haven't said anything.

"C'mere" he says pinching my nipple and tugging a bit in his direction to draw me in closer. I push his hand away, unable to take anymore without wanting him again.

With a sigh I sit up on my knees and scoot closer, resting my hands in my lap.

Crooking his index finger he subtly informs me that I'm not close enough. I sigh again but this time a smile follows it. I brace myself on his chest and stretch my right leg across his waist so I could sit in his lap. Again I put my hands in front of me, folded on his stomach.

"I aint gonna tell you again kid." He exhales harshly.

Licking my lips slowly I grin at him, exactly like a child who knows they're pushing buttons. But his stoic, blank expression can only fuel my mischievousness for so long. With a pout I lean closer so our faces are close enough to kiss. He doesn't make the first move and it's because he knows I will, and I do.

I kiss him lightly three times and only get a kiss back two times. By the third I feel those oversexed feelings stir up and know I _have _to stop. I snatch my face away from his grip and lick them again.

"You should go, yea?" I ask.

He raises a brow, "Kickin' me out?"

I shake my head no, "I'd always _want_ you to stay." I reply. I expect to see at least a bit of satisfaction in his face but am met with utter distaste.

I'm more than fucking confused and don't bother hiding the fact that I am.  
>"What's that look for?" I ask immediately.<p>

He looks away from me and shakes his head.  
>"Nothin'"<p>

With that he taps my hip, signaling me to get off him. The moment I do he gets off the bed and picks up his clothes strewn around the room, getting dressed as he found them. I sit there in shock, still naked as the day I was born like a complete jackass.

And 10 minutes later I'm left with a cold kiss on my forehead and a half assed goodbye.

For the next week I obsessed over that night. I lay in bed getting barely enough sleep thinking about it, at work I couldn't hear the door chime without looking up in hopes of seeing him storm in. I only went to Four Roses once one night after work, he should have been there, there was nowhere else he should have been on a Friday night. I mean I know he "works" often but his schedule is usually pretty much the same. It wasn't until I tried calling him on Sunday, one of my mother's overnights, that I realized I'd been snubbed by the best.

I'd fallen for the bullshit like every other sucker for Billy and possibly the worst part about it is all I can think is,

"I told you so."

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews and such so far folks! Very much appreciated. I hope you liked the chapter! Let me know what you thought.  
>And in rare form I have the next chapter done so the next update wont be far away at all.<br>**


	11. Romeo & Juliet

"You sure you okay to go out? We can just sit in and smoke the rest of this." Tara was doing a terrific job of keeping my mind off the thoughts plaguing it. That is until just now of course.

Despite the fact that yet another week has gone by and Billy is still acting as if I don't exist, my boss, a customer of the asshole, as I've taken to calling him, is still terrified of disappointing the man. So to save himself from any backlash one would receive from upsetting the asshole, he lets me get away with anything. This includes paying me for hours I'm not actually at work. I guess I didn't come out completely empty handed.

"Why wouldn't I want to go out?"

"I don'know because Bi- I mean that asshole broke your heart and is notorious for showing up at these type of events.

"First, he didn't break anything. You have to give someone your heart before they can break it. I didn't give him shit, secondly, what am I supposed to do, avoid everything because there's a chance he may be there.

Tara stares at me silently for a moment.

"I guess not."

Secretly and I'm positive Tara knew this, I was hoping he was there. I was fucking wishing he'd be there. Why? I think the reason is quite obvious, though I never got the chance to bring out the jealous side of Billy Darley, the prospect of doing so hadn't come at a better time. I'd make him sorry for the day he'd ever imagined dropping me like that was a good idea.

It was around 12:30 when Tara and I arrived at the party. The party was at a friend of a friend of Tara's who also happened to be fucking Bodie. I'd be surprised if the whole motley crew didn't come being that Tara was going to be there as well. And if Joe didn't trail after my friend like a lost puppy then I have no clue what to call it.

Anyway, we got there and were immediately swarmed by the crowd of men standing idly outside the rickety old town house. They all had beer or a red cup in their hands and were visibly inebriated. As we make our way up the walkway I ignore the initial cat calls and filthy comments until a voice calls out my name.

The moment I hear it, my mind of course grasps at the idea of who I wanted it to be the most. But I realize, I recognize this voice, and it's definitely not Billy.

I stop walking and snap my head to the right. Standing about a foot away is my dear old "friend".

"Collin?!" Tara exclaims, rushing over to him and wrapping him in a tight hug.

I almost forgot how his smile affected me. All of a sudden a life I let myself forget about comes flooding back like a tidal wave. My eyes go wide and I stand there completely still as he exchanged short pleasantries with my friend, his eyes flickering back over to me every few seconds.

He sits there on the rail beside the walkway, his dark jeans hanging of his hips, the white wife-beater he's wearing clings to the new expanse of muscles that is his torso. My eyes trail up and down his shoulders, seeing more tattoos littering them than the last time we saw each other.

"Reese! Say hi to the kid!" Tara says nudging me.

I remain still until he reaches out and grasps my hand. He stands up, plucking the toothpick from the corner off his mouth and tossing it on the ground.

He pulls me closer, his grip remaining gentle the entire time until I was close enough for him to wrap his arms around me.

I stand there perplexed still until his lips meet my cheek.  
>"Hey baby." He says directly in my ear.<p>

Something breaks and the shock wears off, I wrap my arms around his neck and hold him closer.

"Collin?" I whisper still a bit confused at seeing him.

"Yea." He chuckles as his open hands rub up and down my back.

"Oh my god, you're here."

"Y'happy t'see me?" he asks as we continue holding each other.

I kiss his cheek and reply, "Of course I am." I whisper.

He hums and sighs and I squeeze him tighter.

"I'm sorry, I just can't believe you're here. I'm gonna hug you for a while."

"It's okay." He laughs heartily.

"I'm going inside," Tara says laughing, "Collin you and I are gonna catch up before the end of the fuckin' night boy!" She exclaims before I hear the click-clack of her heels retreating.

"You got it T." he says to her.

A few minutes pass by and I find it in myself to let go. He holds me by my waist and me by his shoulders as we examine how we've each changed over the years.

"Damn Juliet, you grew up huh?"

Juliet, I haven't been called that since he was sent away. It was an ongoing thing for us since high school. He was supposed to be my Romeo.

I smile and shake my head, "Yea, so did you. Last time I saw you, you were about 50 pounds less muscle."

He smirks and nods, "You know…" he says with a shrug.

Yea, I knew. It was surreal seeing him, we were all sure we'd never see him again. We as in Tara, my mother and my old friends. Seeing him here, now, reminds me of the life we used to live. Just how grown up we pretended to be at 15 and 16.

"What are you doing here? How are you even-"

"Later" he says stiffly.

I swallow a lump of spit and stare into his very dark eyes.

"Okay." I nod meekly.

"Come here." He says opening his arms again.

I smile widely and he hugs me tighter than before.

"Would ya fuck-er already, damn!" One of the men standing around yells out loudly.

Collin ignores him and whispers he missed me.

"I missed you too."

He pulls away and promises to talk to me in a few minutes.  
>"I just gotta talk to an' old friend first. I'll be in there soon." He says nodding to the loud party I was no longer interested in.<p>

"Okay." He holds my hand until the space makes us separate. I can feel his eyes on me, going up the steps until I get inside, sparing one last glance at him before I disappear behind the front door.

Tara bombards me the moment I step inside. Joe, who had been on her arm gives me a polite wave and I do the same.

"What the fuck is happening? I thought he had ten fuckin' years!?"

I shrug and shake my head, "I know, he didn't tell me ye-"

"Who had ten years?" Joe asks stepping beside Tara and wrapping his arm around her.

"Collin. Ya know him?" Tara asks looking over at him.

Joe takes a gulp from his Styrofoam cup as he nods.  
>"Yea, I know 'em. Somethin' about some evidence they didn't bring t'court when he first got charged. He lucked out."<p>

I bite my lip and shift my feet a bit, taking a glance out the window beside the front door to see if he was finished outside yet. I catch a glimpse of him with his hand on his chest as he laughed at something someone said. I can't help but smile myself as I watch him.

"You tryin' to fuck him or somethin'?" Joe asks grinning widely.

"No! Of course not I…he's…we-"

"They got history is all," Tara explains.

"Hmph, well any way ya put it Billy ain't gonna want to hear about any history." Joe says taking another gulp of his drink. Tara immediately whacks his chest with the back of her hand.

"Idiot!" she snaps giving him the stink eye, "I distinctly told ya not to-"

"Your brother can suck my dick," I say crossing my arms over my chest, "Where's the vodka?"

Joe points across the house, I'm guessing toward the kitchen. I follow his finger, listening to Tara chastise Joe's lack of tact.

I manage to forget all about Billy and my worries in sharing a bottle of peach vodka with this other girl who was adamant about out drinking me. We were on our fifth shot when the poor girl's face turned green. As she runs off to find a bathroom with her hand over her mouth I hop up on the kitchen counter with the bottle between my legs.

I close my eyes as my head lolls to the side, the early onset of inebriation is setting in.

"Havin' fun?"

I open my eyes to see Collin standing in front of me with his arms crossed over his chest, a smug look on his face.

I can't contain myself, smiling brightly at him I hop off the counter and wrap my arms around him again.

"It's so good to see you, you have no fucking idea."

Chuckling he hugs me back just as tightly as before.  
>"I needed this," I sigh.<p>

"What's wrong?" he asks pulling away to look me in the eyes.

I look away and shake my head. I couldn't possibly tell him the truth.

"Nothing, I just, I missed you."

"I know, I missed you too."

"Will you tell me now how you're even here?" I ask crossing my arms over my chest now.

"Yea, I guess I should uh?"

I just give him a look. He snorts and shakes his head before simply shrugging.

"I don't even know, honestly. The guards came to my cell one mornin' and said I was gettin' out. I thought they were fuckin' with me but. Warden had em' give me a letter from signed by him and my judge. Said…due to new evidence, I was to be released immediately. Couldn't call nobody so I just hitched a ride home. My ma almost caught a heart attack when she saw me."

I smile at the thought, the last time I saw his mother she was clutching my hand, wailing in tears as her son was being taken away in handcuffs. She moved a ways south almost right after he was sent to prison.

"That's amazing Collin, where are you staying then?"

"Remember my cousin, used to live near ya?"

I nod, "Yea he's got a new place over on Franklin."

It wasn't long before we were all caught up. I told him about work, how big Jason got, my mother. He didn't tell me about jail, I didn't expect him to. He of course, as everyone who's known me for a long time, asks about my mental state. Proudly I tell him I've been fine. Not soon after we're clutching each other laughing, reminiscing about the years when we used to run the streets rampantly.

"Ya mother nearly killed you for chippin' her favorite heels!"

My head falls on his chest as I laugh harder. I put my hand on his chest as I lift up and am interrupted by a voice. Another recognizable voice, but one I wasn't at all ready to hear.

"Collin fuckin' O'Malley."

Collin turns to look at who's called his name. I don't, I drop my head as the smile slowly dissipates from my face.

"Darley!" Collin exclaims happily, turning toward this asshole to clap their hands and bump shoulders in a manly form of greeting.  
>"I thought you'd be dead by now bro." Collin says jokingly, although we all know the notion isn't at all an impossibility.<p>

Billy flips Collin off and says, "Could say the same for you," I see his eyes wander to me from the corner of my eyes. I cross my legs instantly, feeling uncomfortable under his gaze.

"So you know my girl huh?" Billy asks stepping closer to me and putting his arm over my shoulder.

I freeze. My eyes go wide as Collin looks at me, confusion written all over his face.

"Is that so?" Collin asks staring at me.

I shrug off Billy's arm and glare at him as all the nervousness I feel turns to annoyance.

"No, not at all."

Billy raises his brows at me and his stony blank face is too much to bear looking at.

I look back to Collin and am met with his hard accusatory stare.

"Well that's not what ya said the other night Reese."

Before he could finish his sentence I hop up off the counter and brush past him harshly as I leave the kitchen in a rush. I feel my throat tightening as I push past the crowd of people in the crowded living room.

Tara calls my name but I ignore her, shaking my head and continuing on my way.

She follows me hastily, telling Joe she'd be right back.

"Where you goin' girl?!" she yells following after me as I storm back down the walk way, all I can see is his stupid face smiling, mocking me.

"Home." I yell back.  
>She follows me down the street and grabs my arm when she catches up to me.<p>

"Talk to me, what happened?" She asks stepping around in front of me.

"He's such a fucking asshole. I hate him."

"Who? Collin?" she asks with wide eyes.

"No, fucking Billy."

"What did he do?" She asks glancing behind me.

I follow her gaze to see Billy strolling out of the townhouse with his hands in his pockets. Standing on the porch he looks down the other end of the street, before he can see us at the opposite end I start walking again dragging Tara with me.

"He basically told Collin we slept together, for no reason."

Tara shakes her head, trying to be that understanding friend she's meant to be. But I can tell her mind is on other things, namely Joe and that party.

"I'm goin' home. You stay." I sigh shaking my head when I hear the rumble of an obnoxious engine back near the house.

"No, I'm leaving too."

"Tara, I don't want to ruin your night. Just stay. I'll catch a cab or the bus."

"Want me to wait?" She asks.

I shake my head again, "No, I'll be fine. I'll text when I'm home."

We say our goodbyes and make our way in the opposite direction of each other. I wasn't even a block away before that engine creeps up on me.

"Need'a ride baby."

The uncontrollable, yet I suppose controllable urge to smash his head in with a crow bar. It takes everything I have to ignore him and keep on walking.

"C'mon Reeses Pieces, its fuckin late y'shouldn't be walkin' around by yaself."

I glance at him quickly, he's almost hanging out the window, one arm hanging down the outside of the door. He has this stupid grin on his face and I want to smack it off. Closing my eyes I inhale deeply and exhale slowly. Just ignore him Reese, just ignore him.

He continues to follow me when I cross the street and, driving down the wrong side of traffic without a care. The cars that noticed his tribal marked heap of crap would immediately divert their direction around to the other side.

"Get in the fuckin' car," he says sternly, his voice losing that assholish, smug edge to it.

"Quit fuckin' following me," I spit.

"Ladies an' gentlemen she speaks!" he exclaims sarcastically.

"Billy I'm serious, leave me alone. You got what you wanted, stop twisting the fuckin' knife now."

"And what did I want?" he asks becoming serious again.

I don't even look his way but speed up a bit more and extend my right arm to flip him off. The moment I do it he slams his foot on the gas. The car peels off leaving only a plume of smoke in its wake.

I sigh, my body relaxing when his car is out of sight. I make it another block alone before I hear the rumble of the engine coming from the block to the left as I come up to another corner. Before I can really react or do anything to get away he's pulled up in front of me.

The car screeches to a stop and he hops out of it in lightning speed. I start to step back, my heart racing when I see his determined face. This is how I found myself in the cross hairs of a very pissed off Billy Darley.

**A/N:****Hope you liked! Thanks to those who are favoriting/following/reviewing(Lauraxxx lol) I appreciate it, but would love more feedback.  
>I'm on a bit of a roll and already have the next chapter and a bit of the one after done. I'm iffy about chapter 12 so I'll be more hesitant to post.<br>Anywho, thanks again dudes!**

**BTW I just felt the need to tell you all that the character Collin in my mind is portrayed as Tom Hardy. He just plays those hard edged urban characters so well and wrote it based on that. **


	12. Apologies, Apologies

***Slight NC-17***

"Fuck off Darley." I hiss shaking my head.

He continues with heavy footsteps to stalk toward me, not looking where I was backing up, I stumble on a jagged edge of the sidewalk. Before I could fall backwards and bust my ass he races toward me, reaching out and grabbing my arm roughly.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" he hisses.

I furrow my brows and yank my arm away once I gain my footing.

"Who the fuck do _you _think_ you _are?!" I yell back, the nearly quite neighborhood is now filled with the shrill sound of my voice.

He glares at me and grits his teeth harshly, "Don't push me Reese, you ought'a be grateful I'm out here-"

The rage building in me in the moment explodes and I have no control over anything that comes out of my mouth, "I didn't ask you to be! In case you didn't fuckin' notice I left the party because of you! Just leave me alone!"

"First off lower ya fuckin' tone and I'm not gonna tell you again. Now get in the car."

"No," I spit moving my face a bit closer to his, staring straight into his eyes, showing no fear.

Something snapped in him and he grabbed my upper arm roughly before dragging me away from the open sidewalk and toward a small alleyway nearby. I fought hard but to no avail and wound up pushed against a dirty brick wall.

"Ya want me to leave you alone?" he asks glaring at me.

I nod, "Yes."

"Get in the car."

"For what?" I shrug, "I won't be one of your damn groupies Billy."

"Did you hear me fuckin' say ya'were?"

We stare at each other in silence for a long while before I give in. With a sigh I push his hand off me and turn my head toward the sidewalk.

"Take me home then."

"No." he retorts before stepping back and walking to his car.

"I'm not going to your house."

"Just shut up, I got somethin' to show you."

My arms remained crossed over my chest as he sped down the streets to I have no idea where. I could be willingly driving to my death but have no idea because I can't say no to this fucker. He spends the majority of the ride mostly relaxed, he glanced at me once or twice and that was it. I forced myself not to give him any slack.

10 minutes go by and he pulls up to this fairly decent looking apartment building. I get out of the car a bit reluctantly, following him into the building and up a flight of steps to apartment 2C. He draws keys from his pocket and unlocks the door, politely, shockingly, letting me in first.

He shuts on the light to the darkened apartment somewhere behind me after shutting and locking the several locks on his door.

First thing I noticed, his apartment is much cleaner than I expected. A lot emptier too.

"Just move in or something?" I ask.

"Yea." He replies gruffly before standing in front of me and nodding down the hallway to our right.

"I'm not going anywhere near a bed with you Billy, this isn't-"

"You wanna fuckin' stand up and talk then?" he snaps.

I roll my eyes and gesture down the hall. Again, I follow him.

He takes me to one of the three doors in the hallway before opening the closed door and revealing his room. It's nothing special at all, simple. A big enough bed tucked in the corner of the four brick walls of his room. He used a box as a nightstand where a pack of cigarettes, a lighter and a few rolling papers occupy.

"I didn't unpack shit yet." He says shutting the door behind us again.

I don't reply, but move to his bed and sit on the edge, far away from the center of it.

Billy stands near the door, silently, staring at me with this blank expression. When I've had enough of him staring at me I get uneasy real quick being in such a confined space with him. Last time we were in a bedroom I didn't exactly make anything hard for him…well I did but, that's not what I mean.

"What did you want to talk about?" I ask glancing to the left, out a window.

"Why ya pissed at me."

"Isn't that obvious?"

"Yea, but ya wrong. If ya think all I wanted was to fuck you then ya wrong."

I get quiet, rubbing my open palm against my knee I clear my throat and reply.  
>"Where've you been then?"<p>

"Busy, I had t'leave last week. Up north."

I raise a brow, "What's up there?"

He gives me the look. I roll my eyes and look away.  
>"Fine. That's understandable. But I called you."<p>

He nods, scratching his stubble and strolling over to the only other piece of furniture in his room. An old wooden dresser a few feet in front of his bed. A top it is a sealed box, he takes a retractable knife from his pocket and flicks it open.

"Had to get rid'a my phone. But you'd know that if ya had a fuckin' phone of ya own."

I felt like I was being bitch slapped with his words, immediately taking to scold my stupid brain. But then again, it's _him _we're talking about. Am I wrong for thinking he'd do that? I think not.

My jaw drops and I stutter, "I-I."

He nods and snorts as he rips through the tape covering the box with his knife.

"Yea, _I-I…_" he mimics, "_I owe Billy an apology_."

I can't even argue with him, as he opens the flaps of the box I inhale deeply and sigh.

"I'm sorry, Billy."

He gives a nod in response. He takes out another, smaller box from the brown box and walks over to the bed with it in his hand. Sitting beside me he starts to open this box as well.

"You could have called me or Tara before you got rid of-"

"I could'a," he says as he opens the box but stops before taking out what's in it. "But then I wouldn't get to see'ya all pissed at me."

Sucking my teeth I roll my eyes at him and turn my head away.

"Asshole." I mutter, crossing my arms over my chest.

"I know right."

I feel him nudge my arm with something hard and look over to see him holding an even smaller box. But this box is smooth and all white with a picture of an Iphone on the front.

My eyes go wide and I look up at him quick as lightning.

"What is this?" I ask leaning away a bit.

He forces the box in my hand with a bit of a grin on his face.

"Billy," I whine taking the box in my hand cautiously, "I can't take this." I sigh staring at the gesture in complete shock.

"Don't argue with me, just take it."

"But I can't, do you know how much this thing costs?" I ask looking at him.

He nods, "I bought it, I know how much the damn thing is." He retorts.

I look back down at the box in my hands and figure there's no harm in looking at the thing. As I remove the top cover of the box I feel my hair being pushed aside by Billy's hand. He smooth's it and his hand down m back before leaning close and placing a soft kiss to the side of my neck.

Biting my lip I ignore his actions as best I could as I stare at the brand new phone laying in my hand.

"Billy, this is really nice but I can't accept this."

"You can..." he kisses higher up on my neck before reaching right below my ear and kissing me there again.  
>"And you will...ya needed it anyway."<p>

I nod, closing my eyes when he nips at my earlobe, "I know but…we're not even a...a..." I can't think straight.  
>"Fuck Billy stop it, I can't think."<p>

"You don't hafta think, just say thank you," he says against my neck, then goes back to sucking on my skin like it's some kind of appetizer.

"Billy," I whimper.

"Ya next words better be thank you or I'm gonna stop."

He moves his left hand to my lap, sliding up the fabric of my dress and putting his hand between my legs. I gasp loudly when I feel him rub me outside of my panties.

"Still want me t'take you home?" he asks dragging his teeth down my neck and rubbing me through my moistening panties. My head lolls to the side and I reach beneath my dress to grab his hand and guide it inside my underwear.

Unexpectedly, he snatches his hand back and moves his lips from my neck.

This series of actions equate to one question, _well?_

Looking at him, my face red and mind a fog I reply immediately.

"No."

He smirks and keeps his eyes on mine as his fingers press against my wet sex, rubbing up and down over and over.  
>"And?" he adds.<p>

Biting my lip I feel my brows pull together.  
>"Ye-yes, thank you, Billy." It came out as a moan and if he didn't drive me so damn crazy I'd be mortified with myself right now.<p>

He lets out that deep, satisfied growl before giving me what I wanted, sliding his hand beneath my underwear and caressing me between my lips.

"Ya know…I don't believe you're very thankful Reese."

Fearing he'd stop I hold his hand in place and start moving my hips back and forth, riding his finger for the friction.  
>"No, no, I am." I say breathlessly.<p>

"Show me then." He replies sternly.

Still moving my hips I close my eyes tightly and sigh, "H-how?"

"Look at me."

When I open my eyes he nods his head to the floor and says, "On ya knees."

For whatever odd reason I feel myself moisten even more from his words and the forceful way in which he said them. Fuck, I'm screwed. I try to get him to move his hand against me but he remains impossibly still.

"I will just…fuckin' give me something now." I beg.

He doesn't say anything but slowly starts to move the tips of his fingers against my clit, rubbing and flicking it until I was flat on my back crooning and moaning to his ceiling as he stared down at me. It doesn't take very long before I tense up and grip his sheets, crying out about coming.

His hand, hidden by my clothes moves faster and faster until I come, shaking and howling in pleasure.

Laying there in silence, a bit worn out I hear the sound of his zipper being undone. He doesn't say anything and neither do I. With my shaky bones I sit up off the bed, slide down off the side of it and place myself between his legs.

I can feel the excitement radiating off him, his eyes burning into me the entire time as he held the back of my head. Controlling my every move, with his hand tangled in my now mess of hair. I have to say, the sounds he was making made me absolutely giddy. I'd never heard Billy moan so loud for such long intervals of time.

"Make that the last time I see you flirtin' with any fuckin' body."

My head keeps bobbing on him as I look up at him confusedly.

"Hmm?" Is all I can really manage to say with my mouth occupied. I start to pull back but he shakes his head no and pushes back down on my head, making me take him further. Looking him in the eye I shake my head no back and take my mouth off him.

"I wasn't." I say wiping a dribble of spit from my chin.

Ignoring me and bring my mouth back down on him.

When I do he goes on to say, "You belong to me Reese."

**A/N:**** I have to admit I was being lazy and a bit hesitant about adding this chapter. But a special thanks to carlaangel for the vote of confidence. Hope you liked it! The next chapter is done and will be posted soon I guess. Thanks guys!**


	13. My Girl

The sun is coming up and I don't care at all.

I feel good for the first time in a long time. After Billy's explanation and little gift, I figured, in more ways than one, that he was worth a shot. And so I stayed all night. Most of the late/early hours of the morning we spend rolling around his bed moaning and aggressively humping each other's brains out.

In the end I'm on my stomach, staring at him as he lays on his back, arm behind his head, smoking a cigarette with the most satisfied look in his barely opened eyes.

"I should go home." I mumble closing my eyes and sighing deeply.

He moves an arm around my waist and holds me tighter, saying no without speaking a word.  
>Smirking I ask, "You want me to stay?"<p>

His eyes flicker down to me for a moment before he looks up as he blows 'O's with the smoke form his cigarette. He holds me a bit tighter and still says nothing else.

Just to fuck with him I start to sit up a bit as if I was leaving.

"Be still." He grumbles forcing me back down with a minimal flex of his brawny arm.

"Grab me my phone then." I say lying beside him on the bed.

Grunting he sits up and grabs my new phone from the box on the floor. Placing it on my bare stomach he watches as I grab it and turn it on. I go through the settings of it all and start adding numbers I'd memorized to the contact list.

"What's your new number?" I ask.

Billy takes the phone from me and enters his number quicker than I did any of the rest of them.

"I'll have to be careful around my mother with this." I mutter.

"For what?" Billy asks.

I look up at him with a raised brow, "Uhm because she doesn't even know I'm seeing someone."

"Tell'er." he replies with a shrug taking another puff.

My eyes go wide and I look at him like he grew another head.  
>"Tell her? Just casually tell her I'm dating Billy Darley?"<p>

He holds out the cigarette to me as he blows out the last of his smoke. I shake my head no and he put it out on the floor. The light shining through the window catches the smoke and holds my attention for a moment.

"You ashamed?" he asks.

I sit up a bit on my elbows and shake my head no vigorously.  
>"Of course not. It's just...well you know."<p>

How do I go about explaining to him that my mother would be less than happy with the fact that I'm with him. A notorious drug dealer and gang leader.

He shrugs again and doesn't say anything further.

"You want to meet my mother?" I ask in complete shock.

"Not necessarily, but I aint sneakin' around like a kid either."

"So what you want to be able to hold my hand in public or something?" I ask grinning at him.

He rolls his eyes and replies, "That's exactly why Reese." His sarcastic tone makes me laugh. Only with him I think the sarcasm isn't even a little annoying. Partly because he never jokes around otherwise, making his humor this mysterious and obscure occurrence that I'm always looking forward to. Even his sense of humor is sexy...

"I'm serious. You want to meet her?" I ask.

He shrugs again making me suck my teeth.

"You know what. Never mind, I think we should wait anyway."

"Wait for what?" he grouses moving me closer, cradling me to his tattooed chest.

"To see how this whole thing plays out of course. I'd feel like an asshole if I introduced you two and a month later you got sick of me."

Billy doesn't say anything and I have to look up at him to realize his reaction. And he didn't like what I said one bit. The frown on my lips makes me frown.

"What did I say?" I ask.

"That. You keep sayin' shit like that. How many times I hafta tell you I don't do this?" he asks looking me in the eye with a deadly serious expression on his face.

"Don't do what? Relationships? I know, that's what I'm saying." I nod.

He shakes his head no, "If I wanted fuck all t'do with ya, you'd know it."

I guess I'm supposed to take that as a compliment.

"Do you know what this means?" I ask.

He gives me a questioning look and I clear my throat and say, "It means that you and I aren't just messing around, or hanging out…And you won't do _this_," I say referring to our nude bodies, "With anyone else…It's called monogamy." I add looking him dead in the eye.

He doesn't seem fazed by the word or anything else I've said.

"Would ya spit it out already," he snaps.

I bite my lip hard and clear my throat, "You're my boyfriend?" I meant for it to be a statement, but nothing is ever really set in stone until he says.

Unexpectedly, and I mean I'd never have expected to see this in a million, trillion years, his lips break into a small smirk. In the seconds that follow a smile grows and his sharp white teeth make an appearance.

I smile back and hide my face in my hands against his chest, blushing.

He chuckles deeply and rubs my shoulder with his fingertips, trailing down my spine.

"That means you have to do boyfriend things you know?" I add laying my cheek back on his skin.

"Don't expect no fuckin' flowers," he keeps a light tone to his voice, relaxed.

It's nice hearing him that way, seeing him without the years of stress added to his face when he's out in the world.

"No like, pet names and cookin' me breakfast," I reply knowing full and well these things are alien to Billy.

"I don't cook" he retorts blandly, "And I'll call ya sweet ass." his filthy tone is matched by his hand gripping my butt and smacking it. I wiggle and smack his hand back.

"Asshole," I mutter.

"So ya know what this means too right?" he asks.

I raise a brow, "What?"

"None'a that grab ass shit with ya little friends."

"I told you it wasn't like that-"

"I aint blind Reese, you were all in his face."

"Only because he's like my best friend and I haven't seen him in literally years." I reply keeping my composure, very surprisingly.

"I don't really care." He replies stubbornly with a very passive shrug. I want to hit him.

"So what are you gonna break up with me if I hug my friend?"

"Don't be stupid." He retorts.

"Fine, if you have boundaries then so do I," I push his arm off me and sit up in front of him with my legs folded.  
>"Here are the terms Darley," I begin.<p>

"Terms." He snorts lowly.

"Yea, terms. Not that I do it anyway but no grab ass with my male friends, no grab ass with your female 'friends'." I say using air quotes.

"Why you say friends like that?" he asks

"Because I know you've fucked at least one of those desperate women at the bar that you claim to be just friends with."

He doesn't say anything and it's an answer all on its own.

"Exactly. So no ass smacking after tips, no letting them kiss your cheek, basically nothing I couldn't get away with if I did it with another guy."

He glares at me and I'm almost positive he'll just throw in the towel right now.

"Do you accept these terms?" I ask as if I was reading him an actual contract.

He stares at me silently for a moment, blinking slowly with his long lashes before he sighs and grunts.

"Yea, whatever."

I grin widely and nod at him.  
>"Good."<p>

I stand up on his bed and step over his body to get to the floor. I grab my dress which was on the floor as well.

"Where're my…" I get on my knees and look under his bed for my underwear. I spot Tia's heels and grab them.  
>I feel something soft land on my head and grab at it to see Billy had thrown my underwear at me.<p>

"Thanks." I say sarcastically.

"Would you give me a ride?" I ask.

And I have to say, I expected this the moment the words left my mouth.  
>Billy glances down at his flaccid crotch and gives me the dirtiest smirk ever.<p>

"You don't hafta ask sweetheart."

Rolling my eyes I slide my underwear on quickly and stand back up, cocking my hip to the side and glaring at him.

"Seriously?" I ask noticing he wasn't as…relaxed as he was a few seconds ago.

"Just come sit down on my lap, I'll make it fast." He says with a boyish smile on his face. I bite my lip and look up at the ceiling.

What have I gotten myself into?

As I settle into his lap, having lost my underwear and hiking up my dress he kisses my lips sweetly, gripping my waist to guide me down on him.

"Mmmh, _my_ girl."

**A/N:**Hope you all enjoyed Billy's semi sweet side. Thanks so much for the continued support especially to those who review. Drop me a line and let me know what you think please :) Next chapter is done and as of 12:00 this morning I'm almost finished with the one after that, I'm definitely on a roll. Later folks!


	14. Right?

My mother was silent when I walked in yet again in the early morning. She was at the kitchen table sipping her coffee with her uniform on. I couldn't tell if she just got in from work or was on her way out. These days aren't always that clear to me as of late.

I place my keys on the key holder beside the door and slip out of my shoes, leaving them beside the door as well.

"Good Morning," I say to her in Spanish.

She glances over her shoulder at me and simply looks away, going back to her food.

I stand still, confused as I watch my mother give me the cold shoulder.

"Is Jase uhm, ready for school?" I ask, not knowing what else to say.

She inhales very deeply then sighs.  
>"It's Saturday."<p>

My jaw drops and I clear my throat, "Right, I knew that."

I walk across the living room to get to the kitchen, hoping there is coffee left over.  
>I make a strong mug with little milk and sugar before rejoining my mother in the living room. I knew if I went straight to my room she'd know something was definitely wrong.<p>

I sit on the couch and lean back, resting my aching back, god damn Billy.

"Shouldn't you be on your way out?" I ask looking at the clock to see it's almost 7. She's usually waiting for the bus by now.

"Had to call out, I wasn't sure if you'd be home or not." She retorts stiffly.

"Ma, when do I never come home?" I ask.

She rolls her eyes, I can't see her but I know her well enough.

"I don't know, you been out a lot in the past few months."

I take a hard sip of my coffee and roll my eyes right back.

"It hasn't even been that many times," we both know it's a lie. Almost every weekend I've been out.

If I'm not partying with Tara I'm at Billy's apartment.

"You smell like sex and whiskey Reese." My mother spits.

I freeze instantly and she glances over her shoulder at me. I want to hide under the couch, anywhere that's away from her accusatory eyes.

"I-I, ma I'm not-"

She points a stern finger at me and in Spanish says, "Don't you lie to me."

I close my eyes and grip the handle of my mug tightly. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"What do you want me to say then?" I ask with a meek shrug.

"I want you to tell me the truth…" she trails off and I raise a brow, waiting for her to finish talking.

"Have you started drinking again?"

I think I'm perfectly capable of looking her in the eye until that moment. My gaze drops and I stare at the dark liquid in my cup.

"It's nothing I'm not in control of ma." I reply, "I don't even get drunk half the time."

"And what about the other half? Huh?"

I shrug, "It's not a big deal ma, it's not like before. I can handle it," I can tell my trying to reassure her is only pissing her off more.

"You didn't answer me. What about the other half? I'm not stupid, tell me which low life you chose to ruin your life over?"

For whatever reason I get extremely defensive. Even though I had no intention of telling her of Billy, the idea that she could ever speak about him as if she knew him pissed me off. But I bite my tongue.

"He's not like that…he's good to me," I stand up abruptly and go back to the kitchen to empty the mug in the sink.

"Good to you huh? What is he a drug dealer?" she asks from the kitchen, making me freeze again.

I could ask how she'd know something like that but we've all grown up in this town.

I walk to the doorway of the kitchen, facing my mother where she sat at the table.

"And if he is? Would you please tell me how he'd be any different from my father?"

My mother's eyes go wide. She looks like I stabbed her in the chest and I almost regret it.

"Christ, I hope you're not as stupid as you're sounding right now Reese."

I open my mouth to say something else when she cuts me off.

"And if he is, then no. He would be no different than your junkie fucking father! Do you understand what kind of a world you're setting yourself up for?!" She exclaims.

"It has nothing to do with that ma! I've grown up! I know how to handle myself now, I'm just having fun for Christ sakes!"

"It's all fun and games until your stupid ass gets pregnant by one of these lil' boys running around here thinking he's a man. And you find yourself slaving to keep a roof over stupid, ungrateful kids that keep making the same dumb mistakes you did."

I clench my fists and glare at her, "This could be the dumbest mistake I'll ever make but right now I've never been happier, he makes me happy! And I'm not being stupid. Yea I drink sometimes! But I'm not nearly as bad as I used to be! I have it under control. And unlike you _ma _I know what birth control and condoms are."

She watches me intently, looking all over my face before inhaling very deeply and exhaling roughly.

"You know what?" She asks.

"What?"

"Fine. Do whatever you want. Just don't come crying to me for a damn thing. He makes you happy?" She asks.

I nod.

"We'll see how long that lasts."

I roll my eyes at her and turn to my room for a much, much needed nap.

3 heavy knocks hit my bedroom door and I lift my heavy head from my pillow and look at it. It's then that I realize I'm still in my clothes and collapsed across the bed with little care.

"Reese?" a deep voice calls me.

Dropping my face back on the pillow I groan, "What?"

"Can I come in or what?" Collin asks.

I sit up again, more excited than before.

"Come in." I call out clearing my throat.

He opens the door and comes in, facing me with a bright smile before closing the door behind him.

"Just gettin' home?" he asks strolling over to my bed.

I roll on my back and watch him as he plops down at the end of my bed as if it hadn't been years since he last did so.

"Yea." I reply.

"Been with your boyfriend a lot huh?" he looks down at his shirt, avoiding my gaze.

I don't reply and clear my throat.

"Take that as a yes," he mutters, "Have to say, I never thought I'd see the day you'd stoop that low."

Collin and I have always been totally honest with one another. But I have to say, I wasn't expecting that.

My eyes go wide and I cock my head back a bit.  
>"Wow," is all I can really say.<p>

"Don't fuckin' act like I don't have a reason to say that Reese. Ya smarter than that."

I lean back against my headboard and sigh.  
>"Collin, please."<p>

"No," he retorts sternly, "I'm only gonna say this once, you stay with him an' you're gonna learn real fast just how scum operates." His pointed finger makes me feel the way I do when Billy gets on me about shit, like a child.  
>"He's no good for ya."<p>

"I don't understand how you all can judge and you don't know anything about him and I. Okay, yea, he's not the ideal guy I saw myself with, but he doesn't treat me bad. He makes me happy."

"Reese." He groans cutting me off, "I know you're young and I know you still want to have fun. But I've known him longer than you have. I've seen him do this bullshit with a few other little girls with a nice ass and long hair. The sex, the money, all that shit is fleeting. Billy will fuck you over and you won't even see it comin'."

His words literally terrified me. I wanted nothing more than to be able to heed his warnings, to agree and tell him I'd make everything right. Give back all the gifts, all the money before it came to the pain I could potentially be exposing myself to. But that arrogant side in me was defending him.

He'd never do that to me. I'm different, they don't know…

As I sit there in silence, damn near tears, pulling on my comforter and staring at it intensely my phone which had been on the night stand directly beside me buzzes.

I glance over at it, not intending to answer it until I saw who it was.

I look at Collin who was shaking his head. He didn't even have to see who it was before his face turned even sourer than a moment ago. I bite my lip hard as the phone starts to ring and vibrate, the thought of ignoring the call of course crosses my mind. But I can't.

For the first time in my life I feel like I could understand my father. The unwanted need to ruin your life; knowing things won't turn out the way they should, but reaching for that drug with a deeply seeded hunger that wouldn't go away.

I ignore the glare Collin fixes me with as I stand up, grabbing my phone and answering it as I made my way to the hallway to talk in private.

"Hey." I answer dejectedly, my voice very low because I didn't want Collin or my mother to hear.

"Yea, doesn't the kid nee- what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm great. What were you saying?" I'm praying he lets it go. But the long pause before he continues speaking says otherwise.

"Where you at?" he asks sharply.

"Home still."

"You better tell me what's up or I'm comin' over there t'find out for myself, Reese."

I swallow and close my eyes, "I need to call you back, I'm in the middle of something with my mother. Just relax, I'll call you in a little while okay?" I ask softly, hoping my calm tone would ease him.

"Unh huh." He replies stiffly.

"Bye." And I hang up.

When I got back in my room Collin is standing near my dresser, eyeing a small picture, the only picture I had of him and I stuck to my wall with the others of my family and friends.

He glances at me when I come back in the room, closing the door and leaning against it.

"You're mad at me." I sigh.

He doesn't say anything but clenches his jaw tightly, this means yes, he's pretty pissed at me.

"Collin, please don't be mad at me."

I walk over to him and wrap my arms around his neck. He puts his hands on my waist and tries to push me away. I remain where I am, hugging him tighter to me.

"Please." I whisper pressing a light kiss to his cheek. This works on most men, including Billy. I know it's wrong to use this kind of intimacy to benefit me, but I can't help it. Especially with someone I care so much about.  
>"You and my mother think I'm so stupid all of a sudden. Nothing has changed, I'm with him yes, but I'm not going to let that keep me from what I'm supposed to do."<p>

He looks down at me, our faces probably too close as we meet eyes.

"Yea? And what you supposed to be doing?"

"Getting out, remember?"

He snorts, remembering how often our plans to leave would change depending on what new movie we watched and became obsessed with as kids.

"Yea well, I fucked that up. Not much a con can do…you still got a shot though."

"I'm not stupid Collin."

He gives me a very skeptical look but caves eventually. The slight pout I was giving him might have helped.

"You trust me don't you?" I ask jerking him with my arms.

He nods, "Always, it's that fucker I don't trust."

"As long as you trust me and have nothing but our best interests in mind then that's not something I'll argue you on. I understand Collin, and I love you for coming over here to talk some sense into me."

"Well it didn't work," he shrugs.

I smirk, "Not the way you wanted, but it worked."

He chuckles shaking his head, "Sneaky fuck."

"You love me."

He pulls me close and holds me tight.  
>"Yea, I do."<p>

"Good, 'cause I love you too."

We hug for a very long time and don't let go until he lets go.

"A'right, I gotta go." He mumbles pressing a kiss to my cheek.

"Okay, text me or something this week please."

He nods again and hugs me from the side once more before leaving.

The moment he leaves I collapse on my bed with a sigh.

Everything Collin's told me is running rampant through my mind. How does someone continue on in a relationship unsure of almost everything about the other person? Sure he says his intentions are pure…most of the time. But to know for sure I'd have to stick around and find out…right?

And I already know Billy would make me feel like a complete asshole if I bought to his attention my doubt in his intentions…yet again.

So I won't. I'll keep that in my back pocket as a reminder, a cautionary supplement throughout this ordeal.

"Hey," I answer when his end of the line picks up.

"Yea," he replies as per usual, "So ya mom[MH1] reamed ya or what?"

I smile and collapse on my bed with a sigh.

"Sort of, but she'll get over it."

"She know about me[MH2] ?" he asks.

"Kind of, she doesn't know what your name is though. When I walked in she said I smelled like whiskey and sex, so she knows we're fucking."

He barks out a loud boisterous laugh and I only roll my eyes.

"It was embarrassing Billy." I whine.

"We drank whiskey last night?" he asks gruffly.

"Yea, don't you remember you did the shots off my stomach."

"Yeaa." He sighs, "Fuckin good night uh?"

Smirking I roll onto my stomach and sigh, "Mmhm. But now she's pissed because I didn't get here soon enough to watch Jase before she left for work. She thinks I'm going to backslide."

"Backslide inta' what?" he asks confusedly.

My eyes go wide as I realized I've revealed something I had no plans on revealing to Billy.

"Long story." I reply dismissively, hoping he'd just drop it, "You were going to say something when you called before, what was it?" I ask.

Someone on his end, in the background says something, the voice is muffled. Billy mutters 'yea' back.

"I gotta go, but didn't you say the kid needed money for some trip?"

"The Fenway trip?" I ask.

"I guess," he replies.

"Uh, yea. But I'm just going to take him in a few weeks when I get paid."

I'd told Billy earlier this week that Jase was upset at my mother and I because we didn't have the money for a school trip to Fenway park. It would be his first ever ball game and he wanted to go so badly but it was that time of the month where all the bills matched up exactly and sucked my mother and me completely dry. So no trip for Jase, and cold shoulder to from him to my mother and me.

"Meet me by the store in a hour."

"Billy?"

"Just be there, I gotta go," he says quickly before hanging up.

"Ok" I sigh even though no one is on the line.

I know what he's getting at already, and while I truly admire the gesture, I'm still on edge about things. But while I'm thinking so intently about things…shouldn't this add to my views of him?

I mean if Collin is right about all the other girls Billy has been with and dropped then am I just another one of them? Am I an exception? How many girls did he buy expensive things and pay for their little brothers' field trips? Somehow I don't find Billy to be that generous or giving. I know him much more than I did all those months ago when we met and it seems entirely plausible that I'm right and he'll stick around…

Right?


	15. Simple Gesture

**A/N:**** So, first off I know you all had to notice that atrocity at the end of last chapter. It was notes I typed as a comment in Microsoft and had no idea it would show up when I published. If it wasn't for Lauraxxx I'd wouldn't have even noticed, thanks again! Anyway, lesson learned I'll be combing through every chapter to follow. And the plot sequences you all read in the last chapter have changed so you all won't know what's to come. Hope this makes up for the crappy mistake, and thanks for the reviews guys I really really appreciate it! **

"Thank you." I cup Billy's face in my hands and peck his lips. He grips my waist tighter as I scoot closer to his chest in the confined space of his car.

"That was so sweet of you Billy, you didn't have to do that."

He grunts and pulls away a bit, "Sweet?" the pure disgust on his face makes me smile wide.

"Yes, sweet. You should have seen his face, he didn't stop smiling all the way to school."

A smirk crosses Billy's face and I've never seen something more fucking heartwarming. Billy smiling at the reaction his actions gave a child? Are you kidding me? I'm pooling in my underwear right now.

"Yea?" he asks with a bit of a snort.

I nod, pecking his lips again, shorter than before. The smile on his face widens as we kiss and I feel special, seeing this side of him.

When we pull away he stares me in the eyes for a long time. Biting my lip I look over his entire face and lick my lips.

"Ya welcome." He mumbles, his deep voice makes me shiver.

I peck his cheek once more and sit back in my seat.

He starts up the engine of his car and pulls off from my apartment. After yet another disagreement with my mother, she decided that she and Jase would go to Connecticut for the weekend. Her sister, my aunt is like a sanctuary from this place. I wasn't too upset, but did find it to be a bit extreme that she just decided to up and leave. Not to mention I wasn't even invited. I mean I could have gone, I could have called in and told my boss I'd be out of work for 3 days but she didn't ask me to, so I didn't.

Instead, the moment I found out about the trip I texted Billy.

My mother was smart, the one thing she told me before she left was not to have anyone in the apartment. Also that she'd be giving our trusted neighbor, Mrs. Rose, a key to look in on the apartment every morning and evening. To avoid still having to sneak around I asked Billy all soft voiced, unable to look him in the eyes, if he'd mind if I stayed over the weekend.

He seemed excited, well that muted kind of Billy excitement. He took me food shopping and everything, milking this weekend for all it's worth. Embarrassing isn't enough to describe how I felt after placing the box of large extra thin condoms in the cashier's conveyor belt amongst the other groceries. This is of course only at Billy's request. Grinning and laughing when the old woman glanced between the two of us in shock and horror, of course most of the horror aimed at Billy.

His apartment now donned two simple leather couches in the living room surrounding a large flat screen TV. The once bare apartment now a little less ominous. In the kitchen, where I hadn't stepped foot in before was still pretty empty. The only things to stock it were things we'd just bought, all plastic kitchenware and the food I'd bought to make while I was here.

It's no secret that Billy is not a homebody. He's a streetwalker and always has been according to him and Joe. His sudden decision to add a bit of décor to the place made me wonder. Even his bedroom had changed, well a little. There was another TV, an actual nightstand, on his side, and the bed pushed to the middle of the room as opposed to the corner. There were even blinds over the windows.

But I didn't say a word about it. I only gave Billy a smile when he asked what was wrong with me. Why I was smiling nonstop in the first place. I simply shake my head as I continued unpacking the groceries and arranging them in his kitchen the way I wanted.

After I started dinner which he asked to be, _'The shit I made last time, wit'the banana _stuff', I joined him on the couch. He was comfortable with a beer in hand as he scrolled through the channels with his remote. Seeing me seated with some space between us, Billy glances at me then back at the TV. He wraps his right arm over my shoulder and pulls me closer so our thighs are touching.

Resting my head on his chest I watch him try to find something to watch.

"I got somewhere to be t'night" he mumbles, before taking a swig from his beer.

I look over at him and raise a brow, "Where? Can I come?"

"No," he spits with a grave undertone, "You won't even know I'm gone."

I don't push it, even though the idea of him being out doing god knows what in the middle of the night is beginning to get to me.

"Would you let me know when you're leaving then?" I ask.

He glances down at me, his eyes hard and blank as he scrutinizes every inch of my face.

"Why?" he asks, his eyes boring into mine.

I feel self-conscious and nervous, shrugging I look down at my lap and try to not appear so nervous. I feel his eyes on me while I avoid his gaze. After a minute he puts his finger to my chin and guides my face so we can look at each other.

"Why?" he asks again, his gaze softening and his tone not as harsh.

When I try to look away again he holds my face still.

"Tell me."

Licking over my lips I bring my legs up on the couch and tuck them beneath me.

"It's not a big secret that I care about you…what if something happened to you?"

He furrows his eyebrows and replies, "I'll be right back Reese, nothin' is gonna happen."

"How can you be sure though?" I ask.

"Because I am." His tone is nothing short of certain. It eases my nerves just a little but not enough to let it go completely. Seeing this, Billy leans closer, caressing the side of my neck as his lips press against mine. I let him take my mind off my worries and in no time I'm pressed against him, ready for more.

Grasping the back of my head he starts to peck my lips slower, before whispering to me in that deep voice.

"I'll be right back okay?"

Resting my forehead against his and closing my eyes I nod, "Yea."

And for the rest of the night we stayed just like that, me wrapped in his arms as we lounged on his couch watching TV. We ate and immediately after I started to fall asleep. It wasn't that late and he said he wasn't leaving anytime soon, but for some reason I didn't want to go to sleep.

"Come on, ya fallin' asleep again." Billy mumbles when I nod off on his shoulder again. I'd found a comfortable spot across his lap with my head on his shoulder.

"Mmnnoo." I whimper, wrapping my arms around his neck and holding him tight.

Ignoring me he shuts off the TV and locks his arms beneath my legs, lifting me up without any hesitation and carrying me to his room.

He places me on the left side of the bed and starts to let me go when I grab his arm and tell him to stay.

"I gotta clean up," he murmurs.

"I'll do it later, lay with me."

With a sigh he climbs over me, discarding his jeans and shirt before settling behind me. He wraps an arm around me and pulls me into his embrace, my back pressed against his back. I bring my fingers to his forearm and rub his tattooed skin back and forth with my fingertips.

"Go t'sleep." He grouses tugging me to grab my attention.

"Soon…will you tell me something?" I ask half sleep.

"If I tell you something you takin' ya ass to sleep."

Chuckling I nod, "Okay." Inhaling all the way in I focus on the wall in front of me before asking.

"What was your mother like?"

He doesn't answer right away and I fear I've pushed a boundary. Just when I'm about to tell him never mind he clears his throat and says.

"She was…nice…too nice. Too good for my father an' she was real smart. She was the only reason I didn't drop outta school, wanted me t'go to college an' all that shit. When she died I thought about it…but I had to stay an' take care'a Joe."

It was the last thing I ever expected to hear from Billy's mouth. I turn to face him, my eyes wide as saucers and my brows about to shoot off my forehead.

"For real?"

He nods, his gaze is far away and I know he's thinking about her. Then just as quick, as if the moment never happened his face hardens and he looks down at me.

"Sleep."

Biting my lip I lean forward and kiss him. He lets me get away with it for a moment before he pulls away and forces me to settle back into my little spoon position. He runs his fingers through my hair until I fall into a deep sleep.

When I wake up it's around 12:30 in the morning. I feel around the bed, though I know he's already gone. Then like a tidal wave his unmistakable, devastating amount of dread comes over me which came as more than a shock. I don't know what it is. I've never ever felt like this before. I've felt loss. I know what that is all too well. This is not that.

This is a grave…ache almost, and I realize as I lay there listening to the city outside his window that I just want him near. I miss him. When laying with his pillow curled beneath my nose wasn't enough I got up to clean the kitchen. Once it's spotless and as organized as I felt like making it at 1 A.M. I settle back in his bed and turn on the TV to keep my attention. I check my phone, using it to hold my attention until I got bored with it.

I was in the middle of watching late night cartoons when the front door started to make noise. Before I can stop myself I'm walking across the room to peer out the doorway like an idiot.

He walks in pissed off, his anger emitting loud. His whole demeanor reads tense and the flow of swears from his mouth makes it all the more obvious.

"Hey." I whisper, leaning my head on the wall as I watch his every move.

His head snaps over to me and his face doesn't change, he still looks annoyed and pissed.

"Why'you up?" he snaps.

"I uhm, I just woke up…I wasn't t-tired."

His attitude, unlike most days didn't make me upset but made me feel uneasy. Once he locks the door he rips off his jacket and throws it across the living room with no regard. I watch in total silence.

"What happe-"

"Don't fuckin' start, Reese. Go to bed." He just about growls refusing to look at me.

I grip his door frame tight, unmoving that is until he faces me head on. There is blood dribbling down his eyebrow and his jaw looks like someone took a small bite out of it. I gasp and rush toward him.

"Are you okay? Who did that?" I try to reach up to examine his face but he snatches away from me and takes a step back.

I step forward again and he takes another step back before putting his hands on his hips. The stance isn't unfamiliar but the glare he's giving me is. This menacing glare as if I was a complete stranger in his house, waiting, tapping his foot.

"Billy just let me hel-"

"Go t' fuckin' bed!" his voice damn near shook the entire apartment and made my ears ring. I stand there shocked and scared for about two seconds before I turn away to leave him.

I stumble away in a hurry back to his room, without thinking about it begin to get dressed. I stuff whatever belongings that are out in my bag and throw on my sneakers, shaking the entire time.

I didn't realize I was crying until he called my name from the door. I look up at him and a tear falls on my lip. I wipe it away fast with the back of my hand and clear my throat. He calls my name again, rougher this time, making me jolt. But I don't look at him this time, I continue tying up my sneakers as fast as I can with my shaky hands.

"What the fuck'a you doin'?" he asks walking toward me. I stand up in and instant, realizing now that I had to get around him.

"I'm leaving." My voice is shaking beyond my control.

He inhales and grunts out a sigh, "Would you just go back t'bed, don't fuckin' make this about you."

"I'm not, I just don't want to be around you right now."

"Why? What the fuck did I do?"

"I don't feel like talking to you Billy. I'll take the bus home."

"The hell you are." He spits walking toward me.

I sneer and walk toward him, intent on fighting my way out if it came to that.

"Move," I glare up at him and try to walk around him but he keeps blocking my way.

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

"I'm not in the mood for this Reese."

"Neither am I! Here I am worried fucking sick about you and you come in here screaming at me like I'm a fucking stranger!"

"I don't need ya t'worry about me! I don't need ya t'fuckin clean me up. Just mind ya damn business, stop askin' me where I'm goin', what I'm doin' it's none of ya god fuckin' business. I'm not gonna tell you again, lay down."

My jaw drops and I stare at him like he'd just grown another head in front of my eyes.

"Fine, I'll stay away from you. But if you think I'm getting back in your fucking bed then you've lost your mind." I couldn't help the sob that left my mouth at the end of my sentence. I take the phone from my pocket as well as the cash he just gave me to have earlier and throw it on his bed.

He glances to the bed and back to me, "What do you want me t'say huh?" His tone still hostile.

"Nothing, you've said enough already."

I move to the left and am surprised when he lets me pass him. That is until a certain point. He grabs my arm, muttering for me to wait. I snatch away from him as if he'd burned me with that hand. He looks at me, his eyes wide and alert.

"I aint gonna hurt ya," he says taking a step toward me. But I ignore him and step away.

I think he gathered how terrified I was in the moment based on the fact that I would not look him in the eye. I stared at the floor waiting for him to get out of my way.

"I aint gonna hurt you." he says again.

The tears are running rampant down my face and I just want to smack myself for it. Noticing my tears Billy exhales and reaches out just as slow to hold my hand. He brings his free hand to my cheek and makes me look at him.

"I didn't mean t'scare ya."

I bite my trembling bottom lip and swallow a sob. He pulls me closer until my face is buried in his chest. I fight the urge to wrap my arms around him, breaking when he bought his free hand to the back of my head, burying his fingers in my hair.

The simple gesture as I said breaks my will and I slowly wrap my arms around his. The tears are dry now and I give up.

"Fuck…I'm…" he was having a hard time getting the next few words out, but I had an idea where he was going.

"I didn't mean t'yell at ya."

He holds me for about another minute before pulling away, moving both his hands to cup my face. He examines my face while I do the same to his.

"You don't have to tell me what happened. But I can't help how I feel. If you don't want me to worry then we better end this now because that's not who I am."

When he doesn't say anything I pull away from him a bit.

He grabs me back, "Stop." He implores grasping my forearms, holding me in front of him.

I take my arms from him and cross them over my chest. He hangs his head a bit, almost like a child in shame as he watches me decide whether or not I'd stay. I already knew I was, it was just sweet watching him squirm. I look back up at him, his eyes burning into mine when we meet.

Sighing I drop my arms and point to his face.

"Will you let me clean you up then?"

He rolls his eyes and nods.

"If you want me to go then that's fine Billy, don't just say it not to hurt my feel-"

"Jesus fuckin' Christ, shut up. I said yes Reese."

I poke his chest and glare at him, "Don't tell me to shut up."

He grunts and walks out of the room, mumbling curses under his breath.

I follow him into the bathroom where he fumbles through his medicine cabinet. He grabs the bottle of alcohol in it and hands it to me over his shoulder. I grab a few pieces of tissue, having to squeeze past him in the small bathroom.

"Sit." I say pointing to the toilet seat.

He lifts his shirt over his head, making my eyes instantly glue to his naked torso. All those tattoos littered along his back and chest always entrance me. Having to force my gaze away I focus on soaking the tissue in alcohol as I turn to face him.

I tilt his head up when we're facing each other and press the tissue to his chin first. He makes a low grumbling sound but doesn't jump at all. After cleaning the entire cut I get more tissue and start to dab at his eyebrow.

"So the person who did this…do they look worse than you?" I ask.

He doesn't say anything but raises his hands, I glance down to see them a bit shaky, his knuckles covered in blood. I hold him my want to gasp and focus back on his face.

"I won't ask anymore, you're okay that's what matters." I sigh.

When he's all clean I throw the bloodied tissues away and put the alcohol back.

Before I could walk away he pulls me back and places me on his lap.

He immediately places several kisses on my neck.

"Thank you." He murmurs.

I grin and place my hand on the back of his head.

"Don't mention it."

After cleaning his knuckles and the little spots of blood on his neck he grabs me in his arms and carries me back to his bed. He places me down in the middle of it and places several kisses to my neck and lips.

"You were really gonna leave?" he asks after a kiss, looking down at me intently.

When I nod he kisses me again before shaking his head no.

"Don't do that again." He grabs my arms and places them above my head.

A big smile breaks on my face and I can't help but giggle as he leans down to shower my collar bone and shoulders with kisses and small bites.

"Don't make me want to go then," my response comes out in a moan.

He doesn't say anything but spreads my legs and gets comfortable between them. His eyes bore into mine and I can't move, stuck staring up at him and having no qualms about it.

"I guess I owe you a damn good apology huh?" he asks with this perplexing smile on his face.

My eyebrows wrinkle as we stare at each other, "But you already said sorry."

His mysterious smile grows and his eyes flicker down my body, clad in a camisole top and yoga pants. He sits up on his knees, his ridged body in full view for my eyes to feast on. I can't help but to touch, starting at the happy trail of hair just below his belly button, crawling my fingers up until I can feel his abs. He places his hands on my knees as I drag my fingers down his hard muscles.

Lifting my legs he wraps his arms around my thighs, keeping eye contact the entire time. Then with little effort he yanks me forward, our middles crashing, making me whimper a little. He chuckles at my reaction and lifts my legs so they're hanging over his shoulders.

"I was thinkin' about you t'night," he says placing a kiss to my lower calf as his hands travel down the inside of my thighs. I close my eyes, licking my lips and lifting my hips a bit as he moved closer to my middle.

"Yea?" I ask breathlessly.

"Unh huh, I was thinkin' about you in my bed waitin' fa'me to get back t'take care a'ya."

"Take care of me how?" He grips my flesh just at the very inner part of my thighs before moving back out.

"You rather me tell ya' or fuckin' show you baby?" he asks gruffly.

I could have exploded in my pants right then and there. Just him muttering those two gorgeous syllables and I was willing to let him do anything to me.

He does it again, sliding his hands up and down my thighs, squeezing at the innermost part of it before moving back out.

"Fuck Billy," I whine lifting my hips again and moving my hand to my middle to relieve the ache he caused.

"Huh?" he asks roughly pushing my hand away and brushing his knuckles against me there. I exhale a loud moan and bite my lip hard to hold it in.

"Show me, show me," I rush out tugging on the edge of his jeans.

He leans back and steps off the bed, letting my legs fall over the edge of the bed. I groan and gaze at him with wide eyes. In the same spot I was told to get on my knees Billy does the same. Dragging my body further down until my legs were spread and hanging to the floor.

Lifting up I push at the rim of my pants until they're just past my butt.

Locking the edge of them with his fingers he pulls my pants all the way off. Throwing the heap over his shoulder. Growling like a hungry animal he sets his sights on my sex, making my insides tighten and my heart lurch a bit from the carnal look in his eyes.

I brace myself for the confounding moment that he'd put his mouth on me. I inhale deeply and hold my breath, gripping his sheets even though he hasn't done anything yet.

"Relax." He grouses using his thumb to glide against my flesh, slipping it between my lips to rub against my clit in circles.

I sigh a long high-pitched moan as my back arches rises off the bed.

His circles start out slow paced and gentle, forcing a multitude of small whimpers and moans from my throat. He stayed there, never venturing farther to ease my growing ache.

"Fuck Billy, apologize already." I groan nudging his back with my foot.

"Patient," he grouses.

Whining in frustration I let him have his way, rubbing me until I was soaking and begging. It isn't until I'm laid back with my eyes closed, and breathing normally that he removes his thumb and replaces it with the stiff tip of his tongue. Flicking me a few times, surprising me, then laying his tongue flat on me, lapping at my sex over and over.

My eyes go wide as I watch his mouth latching onto me and sucking like his life depended on it. It was overwhelming pretty fast, it only took a few minutes before I was shaking and trying to push him away.

I was shaking fiercely, crawling up his bed to get away only to have him follow. Holding me against his face as I alternate from riding it and getting away from it.

"Please, please, please, just…fuck, no m-mor-ah!" he slides his middle finger deep inside me and growls when I moan in approval. Again, another moment where it felt too good to stop and too much to handle. With more force than I expected he start to fuck me with his finger, sliding in another and wiggling them both deep against my spot, continuously tonguing my clit. Alternating between sucking and stroking until I completely fall apart.

I have no control of my muscles as that familiar white blinding light forces my body to shake and contort all over the mattress. And there he is, like a leach, taking everything I released at the peak of it all.

Even when I'm lying there spent, my limbs like jelly, he continues to lick. I have to literally detach myself from him to get him to stop. Gasping for breath I roll away from him until I'm on my stomach, dazed in this beautiful euphoria he's caused.

"God dammit, I for…give you…" I exhale breathlessly, blinking very slowly.

"You should let me piss ya off more often." He chuckles standing beside the bed.

"I don't know if I could handle being upset so often." I whimper lifting my head to up look at him.

Grinning he licks his lips in the sexiest, most nonchalant of ways as he starts to undo his pants. His eyes never faltering from my worn out gaze.

"You gonna get used to it baby, I'll take care'a ya." He says emptying his jean pockets, the cockiest look on his face.

I curl my legs up against my chest and watch his every move in silence.

"What you starin at?" he asks nodding his head at me.

"You. You're awfully sexy ya know."

His smirk only confirms my statement, glancing away from me and shaking his head only made me wetter. Billy being bashful, never thought I'd see the day. Ever.

He's got that look on his face when someone gives you a compliment and you have no idea what to do with it. As if no one had ever called Billy Darley sexy before to his face. If that's the case then I have to say I'm perplexed as to why.

I laugh watching the look on his face. He places his wallet, and the stray cash from his pocket on the nightstand. His eyes flash to mine before reaching behind him, the back of his jeans, trying to conceal what I could only make out as a gun.

My eyes go wide immediately, I can't help but watch, staring at the hunk of metal until he'd hidden it away in the top drawer of his dresser. Still gazing at the drawer even as Billy moved away from it.

"Ay…" he calls out to me, "Look at me." He says sternly, forcing my gaze.

I raise both eyebrows, "Hmm."

"Don't ever touch that…" he says pointing to the drawer.

I don't say anything, but bite my lip and watch the strained look on his face.

"Reese."

I nod, "I won't touch it."

He unzips his jeans and drops them on the floor along with his boxers. For whatever reason I can't fight the smile on my face, glancing over his entirely naked physique. He moves over to his night stand and opens then dipping one knee into the mattress he starts to crawl over to me.

"Ya know what'll happen if ya' touch it?" he asks grabbing my legs, turning me on my back without any fight.

"What?" I ask bending my right leg.

He leans closer to me and having caged me in with his massive body, that lascivious look in his eyes. Kissing my neck and collarbone he drags his teeth across my skin before saying.

"You'd be in trouble." He says grasping my left leg, pulling it up until it's around his waist.

I cackle from the sensation he causes, shooting down from my neck to my right leg.

"What kind of trouble?" I ask, laughing again when he kisses the same spot, laughing when my leg shakes and I whimper his name. He growls deeply, lifting both my legs with his arms, keeping them locked with his forearms.

I feel his hard on poking me, ready…

Catching my gaze, he says, "Put it in."

I gasp and put my hand on his cheek.

"Go slow for now."

He watches me intently before nodding.

"Ok."

"Promise?"

"I fuckin' promise."

And there, pinned beneath him, staring into those pretty sea blue eyes I understand exactly what had been confusing me earlier today. I couldn't look away from him, wanted him close.

My eyes go wide when he slowly pushes inside, not stopping until he was all the way in which, because of the position is much deeper than I've ever felt. Biting my lip hard I can't help the whimpers being torn from my throat.

"Ya okay?" he asks fighting a smile.

I wiggle around beneath him a bit, clenching one of my eyes shut as I try to get used to the feeling.

"Fuck you, don't laugh a-at me."

Kissing my forehead he does exactly that and replies, "I ain't laughin' at ya, just admirin' how good you look like this."

"Like what? Your dick in my stomach? _Carajo_ Billy-fuck!" I exclaim pressing my hand on his thighs.

He starts to move his hips up and down, "Just like that baby," he retorts, his voice and face contorted with pleasure.

I feel like he's taking the breath right out of me. Every movement he makes is like a jab to my stomach. Taking with it a moan that I can't very well control or stop any more.

"You take my dick so good…" he grouses sitting up fully on his knees. Holding my legs back still as he continues moving in and out slowly, letting me feel every inch of him in every direction.

Clenching my jaw tightly I reach for the pillow above my head, anything to grab onto as he took every ounce of my self-control.

"Mmnh-hhunh…nnhhuh Billy," my eyes flutter shut and I move my body up to meet his, trying to make it easier on myself.

"Stay still," he grunts, holding me down firmly on the bed, "Just take it."

He moves faster, harder, launching his hips into mine so he's sheathed all the way in, in one quick motion.

My jaw drops all the way and I exhale a loud moan, my head facing the ceiling.

He does it again, harder and I try to get away.

"No, no, it's too muh-ah! Oh shit!" I scream when he hits my spot.

Delaying his next movement Billy waits until I come down a bit and can look him in the eyes.

"No more?" he asks biting another smile, letting my legs fall a bit.

Licking my lips and shaking my head no I lift my legs back and put my hand between my legs, rubbing my clit in circles with the pads of all my fingers. I'm not sure if it was the endorphins or hormones from how good it all felt but I knew I wanted it to never end.

But much to my disappointment he starts to pull out.

"I think ya had enough."

"No, no, no I want it, don't stop," I beg like a fucking addict.

He ignores me, shaking his head no.

"You look like ya'bout ready t'come…"

"Fuck, fine…come here a second." I say wagging my finger.

With a smirk he leans closer but makes it so he doesn't go deeper. Keeping his waist away and his head close to mine.

Pecking his cheek I whisper to him, in Spanish, knowing he'd be unable to resist exactly what he wanted to hear. Though he didn't know what I said the only word he needed to understand was enough to make him move. And as ridiculous as I felt in calling him papi, it did end up paying off.

He grasps my chin and forces me to look him in the eye.

"You little shit." He grunts, placing a sloppy kiss on my lips before plunging his dick all the way in again.

A smile grows on my face and I wrap my arms around his shoulders. Resuming his same pace and force as earlier he holds my legs even tighter than before and slams his dick inside over and over until I was again on the verge of coming. Roughly driving into me, making the sound of our skin slapping almost as loud as my screams.

When I was seeing starts and had the grade of a fucking rag doll he pulled out. My nails were deep in his back and I started to go stiff. He knew what this meant and took complete advantage of the knowledge.

Just before I could let myself go he yanked himself out, panting tells me to turn around.

I couldn't move just yet and laid there in shock, caught between crying and punching the shit out of him.

After a moment I turn on my stomach lazily.

"Ass up." He spits when I do. Taking my time I lift my lower body until my back is arched downward.

Without any hesitation or warning he grasps my hips and forces his length inside all the way.

"Fuuuuuck," I whine against the mattress, wiggling my ass against his pelvis, "Please Billy."

He holds my hips and slowly begins to pull out. When he's all the way out he yanks me back into his hips. Repeating this process and grunting each time he did, until I was gripping the sheets off the mattress and grinding my teeth close to a fine powder.

"Ready to come baby?" he asks still slamming me against him.

I nod, gasping for breath still.

"Speak. Up," his words accentuated by his thrusts.

My head drops back and I wail up at the ceiling, "YE-E-ES!"

"Ga'head, fuckin' come." He grouses through his teeth, moaning along with me.

A few seconds later I go completely still, gripping the sheets and writhing my hips in every which direction with Billy still deep inside. Gripping my hips in both his hands he yanks me against him once more, forcing an even louder moan from me as he pushes into the movement harshly.

"Mmnghuuhaah!" I scream as I completely lose myself. My eye practically pop out of my skull and I gasp deeply.

I collapse on the bed in a fit of twitches and involuntary jerks. Billy doesn't stop, following me flat on the mattress, his chest pressed against mine as he grips the headboard, fucking me hard and fast until he comes just as hard, pulling out before he does.

I remain on my stomach, in perpetual bliss from being fucked so well while he strokes himself through his orgasm, grunting and moaning as I feel him spilling all over my ass and lower back.

Biting my lip I look back at him and smile when he huffs and collapses on the bed beside me.

"You ain't never leavin' here aright?" he asks out of breath, smiling at me brightly. I giggle and raise a brow.

"I have to leave sometime."

He shakes his head no, "No ya don't. Not as long as I take care'a ya," he leans over and presses his lips to my shoulder and cheek, then my lips.

"You don't even gotta leave the fuckin' bed," he says then kisses me again before sitting up and climbing over me, strutting out of his room butt naked.

When he returns he has a half wet towel in his hand.

"I'd get fat if I stayed in your bed all the time," I say playing along with him.

He walks over to me and cleans me off with the wet part of the towel before drying me as well. I of course lay there stunned and slightly embarrassed.

"Few extra pounds ain't gonna bother me none."

With the sexiest wink known to mankind he throws the towel across the room and climbs back in bed. I turn on my back and wiggle closer to him so my head is on his chest.

"You surprise me almost every day."

"S'that good'a bad?"

"Good," mostly.

Tracing the shapes of the tattoos scattered around his chest I sigh and close my eyes.

"Tell me somethin'," he says, the same thing I said to him before I left.

His fingers fondle my sweated out hair and scalp as I ask.

"Like what?"

"I wanna know the truth," his tone is still even and calm, he isn't angry, but with a request like that you'd think he would be.

My finger stops and I lean against his chest to look at him.

"What about?"

"Ya drinkin' problem, an' whateva else you ain't plannin' on tellin' me."

My eyes go wide and I blink, "H-how did you know?"

He gives me that look like I'm stupid for asking.

"Look who ya talkin' to."

True. I wonder how long I haven't been as secretive as I thought I was.

"How long have you known?"

"That first night ya came t'the bar. An' ya always referencin' to some shit ya used to do without noticin'."

Clearing my throat I look away from him and sigh. I have need to remember just how perceptive Billy is.

"Figures, so what do you want to know?"

"Everything"

I lay back on his chest and inhale deeply, preparing to tell the story of a stupid little girl.


	16. Deniability

"So, you know my father died when I was 11, Jase was a baby and I didn't know how the fuck to handle…anything. I mean, I f-found him for Christ sakes…OD'd right in my bedroom."

Billy puts his arm around my shoulder and holds me closer.

"My mother clocked out mentally for a while after that…wasn't until I almost kicked her ass one night when Jase got really sick before she paid attention. Up until that point I was taking care of Jase myself. I mean I was like 13 taking care of a baby, people used to mistake him for my son all the time. When she went back to normal I pretty much let myself be a kid, or what I thought a kid should be in this neighborhood."

"I started partying ya know, goin' out all the time, me and Tia. Started drinking which I really, really liked. By the time I was 14 I had my own personal bar under my bed. Used to take shots in the morning, full glasses of straight brandy when I couldn't sleep at night. This went on until I was 17. By then I got into other shit, I was doing coke and would've been worse off if it weren't for Tia and Collin."

He hums, "Where you get it?"

"Get what?"

"The coke."

"Uh, I th-think you."

"What?" He asks sitting up at bit to look down at me.

I look at him sheepishly.

"Tia used to tell me that she was getting it from this boy she knew, whose brother sold. I didn't realize until after we met that it was you and Joe."

He stares at me in silence for a while. After a minute he shakes his head and sighs.

"So ya OD or somethin'?"

I shake my head no.

"Never. I uh, ha-had alcohol poisoning a few times, and was drinking nearly every day. When I wasn't drinking I was really sad and sick all the time. By this point my mother notices, well she decides to intervene. Takes me away to a relative's house over the summer to wean me off and I was so upset with her. They never let me drink and the first week there was fucking hell…I guess they all thought cold turkey was going to work for me. But it only made everything worse."

"So it was a Friday, my aunt was out at work and she forgot to lock the liquor away. I didn't waste a minute, by the time she got home I was passed out drunk on the couch. When I woke up I was locked in my room. She told me she wouldn't let me out until I agreed to go away to some hospital for treatment. I of course told her no and to fuck off. She left me in there for a few days, she gave me food and water, but didn't let me out. She and my mother decided it was the best way to handle my problem."

"I…uhm, I don't know why I did it…I know I didn't really mean to, I was just looking for attention. I d-didn't really want to d-die…"

Gripping my hair gently he turns my head to face him. I can't look him in the eye and instead focus on the tattoos on his neck.

"Ya' tried t-"

I shake my head no, "I was just…sitting by the door carving into my thigh."

"Where?" he exclaims in shock.

I sit up from his embrace and turn a bit sideways to show him my outer right thigh. Way at the top, where it's not very hard to hide are the ugly scars that with time and plenty of scar treatment cream they're almost gone. I bite my lip and stare at the ceiling as he trails his fingers against the scars.

"What happened?" he asks stiffly and I could tell all this was beginning to hit him.

Still looking away from him I inhale deeply and sigh.

"She got home, saw all the blood by the door and took me straight to the hospital where they put me under suicide watch until I was stable enough to leave, and I went straight from there to a mental hospital for about almost 6 months."

It remains deadly quiet for I'm not sure how long, I don't want to know and I don't want to look at him.

"You think I'm crazy?" I whisper, my voice barely a whisper. Conscious that if he things I'm crazy now, telling him the whole entire story which ends with me being slightly medicated will be much too much.

He finally stops touching my scars and clears his throat.

"No."

His lack of response, or minimal response is enough to make me look at him.

"What are you thinking then? Probably want to run out the door huh?" I mumble with a sad smile.

"No." he snaps as if I've offended him.

I look away from the annoyed look on his face and bite my lip hard.

"Please say something," I whisper dropping my head a little.

He puts his hand on my knee and pulls me closer to him.

"Look at me."

I turn to face him slowly, not wanting to at all.

The moment our eyes meet he grasps my face and places his lips on mine. Holding my cheeks he makes me forget for a second how awful I felt. I kiss him back though I feel overwhelmed from his reaction. I topple a bit on his chest and brace myself against him, in no hurry when I break our lips away to speak.

"Billy?" I look at him apprehensively, waiting.

He smirks and shakes his head, "What? Ya think I'd be all pissed?"

I shrug.

"I'm proud'a ya kid.

With wide eyes I look at him shocked, "You are?"

"Yea that shit ain't always easy to kick."

I can't help it, throwing my arms around his neck I pepper his face with kisses until I felt like stopping. He puts his hands on my hips as I tip him backward so he's lying on the bed and I'm on top of him. When I kiss his nose for the maybe 5th time he shakes his head and squeezes my hips.

"Don't think ya missed a spot baby."

Grinning widely, all teeth I pull back a bit, still hugging him though.

"Sorry...you just don't know how good it feels to hear you to say that. You really mean it?"

He wraps his arms around my lower back and rubs my spine with his thumb.

"I mean it. But ya know what that means right?" he asks.

I shaky my head, pressing my lips on his chest.

"Ya need t'lay off the shit fa'good."

I didn't have the heart to tell him I didn't start drinking again until we met. But to be perfectly honest, I haven't gotten nearly as drunk as I used to in my drinking days. My tolerance is still way too high for that.

I look up at him and clear my throat.

"I don't know if that's possible. I can-"

"No. You can smoke all ya want but no more drinkin'. You don't hafta come to the bar no more if it's too much."

"Billy you can't parent me. I know what's good for me and what's not."

I snap starting to sit up off him. He yanks me back down, his hands enclosed around my waist.

"Stop it," his glare makes me quit immediately, "I aint tryin' t'parent ya, this is nothin' t'do with authority, it's what's best for ya."

What's best for me? Who is this person?

"Yea well…how many of your boys have drinking problems or drug problems…or both?" I ramble not knowing why when I knew he was right.

"You ain't one'a my boys and don't ever compare ya'self to em'."

Stunned silent I just stare at him my furrowed brows and frown faltering.

"No more," he says sternly, his eyes softer than before.

I bite my bottom lip hard and my eyes flicker away from his bluer more intense stare.

"Okay.

The weeks following that night were…peaceful. The nights I spent going out were back to once in a while and not every weekend. Seeing this change my mother no longer ignored me or got pissed off when I said I was going out. Now, going out meant I was meeting up with Billy. A subject she still didn't warm up to but more so accepted at this point. She doesn't ask me any questions about our relationship. But when I'm not around she stuffs my nightstand with hordes of condoms of every size, color and flavor. Billy laughs every time I tell him she's stocked me up. Not to mention she's been on top of me about my birth control like a hound. I can't say I don't appreciate it though. Jase however has been on a quest to find out if Billy is the guy I'm seeing. He's a smart kid so he constantly brings up the day Billy saw us together. He's tried to hack into my phone more than once to see who I text and is always disappointed when he's denied.

Every day I have to pick up Jase from school I am bombarded with question after question. Why he can't know and it's his right as a little brother to know.

"I know you have rights Jase, but my business isn't one of them, I'm sorry to break it to ya kid."

"What's the big deal Reese? I'm going to find out sooner or later, not like I don't know already."

"If you know already why you keep asking me?" I sigh

"Because," He retorts in earnest, folding his arms across his chest, "You never lie to me," with the biggest pout on his face.

I have to hand it to the kid, he's learned a lot from his big sister. Including how to make people feel like absolute shit on a regular basis. I roll my eyes and shake my head as we come up to his school. Still not giving him an answer I hand him his book bag and lean down to kiss his cheek.

"See you after work."

"Yea, yea." He says with a little smirk on his face before he jets off to meet his friends at the top of the steps.

Work. I'm happy to report that I'm no longer an employee of McDonalds. Billy's reach stretches all over the city. His clients even further. I'm not allowed to know how I got this job specifically and I was against taking it for that reason alone, until I found out it paid 13 dollars an hour plus health care and other benefits.

It's a nice desk job that includes but is not limited to filing legal documents, delivering mail, typing memos, and picking up lunch for several lawyers. I don't mind, it keeps me busy and moving for 8 hours a day and I don't leave the joint smelling like French fries.

My supervisor is okay, she's one of those people who don't let anything personal interrupt work. She doesn't like to talk about anything other than work and I get the feeling that she thinks I'm beneath her. But I could give a shit, I keep my head down, do my job and go home. Plus, I get weekends off.

I thanked Billy plenty-most of the night to be exact. And despite her lack of showing it, I know my mother appreciates what he's done for me so far. I haven't had a drink really since our conversation, but have haphazardly taken up with smoking weed more often. Every chance I get I'm smoking. It happens mostly at Billy's apartment, which he thoroughly enjoys because smoking makes me hornier than ever.

All in all, I've never been this happy for such an extended period of time.

I think I was so overjoyed with my happiness that all the bad things I should have been noticing flew right over my head. It wasn't until tonight that I realized something was definitely up.

At the end of work usually when I get downstairs of the large office building, Billy would be there waiting. But he wasn't. Instead in his place was his little brother behind the wheel of his own car.

I gaze at the car confused through the large window of the lobby before pulling out my phone and powering it back on. The last time I had it on (during my lunch), I'd gotten no word from Billy about Joe picking me up. As I step outside, the night's breeze blowing through the cardigan I wore over my work clothes.

Joe watches me, an anxious look in his eyes. I pull on the door handle, saying hello politely before sitting down and getting straight to the questions. My phone showed no messages and I texted Billy to ask him what was going on immediately. Joe, in the fashion of his older brother evaded all of my questions; yet the poker face he was wearing was partially answer enough.

After my failed attempts at getting information, all of my questions being referred to: "Billy'll tell ya," the car was silent. It wasn't until we drove up into the hospital drive way that sheer panic tore through me.

I look at Joe eyes wide and mouth agape, ready to curse him in every way until he told me what the hell we were doing here.

"It ain't Billy," he says when I take a deep breath to sustain the onslaught of words I'd had for him.

I sigh, my shoulders drop and I close my eyes.

"Oh, thank god. Who is it then?" I ask, leaning into my seat more, resting my nerves.

"Billy'll talk t-"

"To me I know," I snap cutting him off in exasperation.

He doesn't say anything but parks the car at the entrance of the hospital. Billy who had been leaning against one of the large pillars surrounding the sliding door starts to make his way to the car. Joe gets out, muttering he'll see me later, I don't say anything as I'm staring at my blood streaked boyfriend.

Our eyes lock until Joe interrupts our gaze. They share a few words, all hushed of course before Joe pats Billy's shoulder and walks around him inside the hospital. I turn down the music playing softly and watch him closely until he's inside and seated beside me.

"Tell me now." I demand staring at his bloody white v-neck.

He glances at me as he puts a hand on the wheel and takes the car out of park. It isn't until we're on the street driving that he answers me.

"Bodie got shot."

My eyes go wide and I gasp.  
>Billy doesn't have a best friend, but if he had a best friend it would be Bodie. From what he's told me they've been knowing each other (best friends) since 5th grade. I can tell by the stoic expression on his face that he's hurting more than he'll ever let on.<p>

"Is he okay? What the hell happened?" I rush out.

"Yea, lost a'lot a fuckin' blood."

He doesn't elaborate on what actually happened.

"You didn't get hurt did you?" I ask scanning over his body, clad in his dry blood stained shirt and jeans.

He shakes his head no before resting his left arm on the window opening, chewing on the side of his thumb as he drives slower than normal. I know it's because he's now in deep thought, so I keep quiet.

Much to my surprise we pull up to my place, Billy doesn't look at me as he puts the car in park but waits in silence for me to get out.

"I-uhm…so, you don't want me to come to your place?"

He shakes his head no, "I'm gonna go clean up an' I'm leavin'."

"Oh." My heart sinks.

He's out to do no good. I can only assume he's going to conspire with the rest of his flunkies about who did this to Bodie. That's if they don't already know, and if they do know, then I have even more to worry about.

"Ga'head, I'll call ya later." He says nodding to my building.

I take off my seat belt and scoot closer to him across the seats.

"Would you come over when you're done?" I ask putting my hand on his left cheek, turning his face to look at me.

"I ain't in the mood to sneak aroun' ya mother," he replies sharply, I wouldn't argue even if that's what I was optioning based on that tone alone.

I shake my head, "No, I'll come downstairs. I just want to see you tonight."

He eyes me for a while, his eyes not faltering in its hardness.

"Don't look at me like that," I mutter rolling my eyes at him.

He doesn't say anything but nods and flickers his eyes away from my face.

I suck my teeth and give him a quick kiss to the lips, seeing he won't let up even a little.

"See you later then."

I go upstairs a bit numb, knowing I should feel annoyed or sad. But I don't, I just feel…there.

When I got upstairs my mother was in the kitchen cooking. Jason was watching the discovery channel in his underwear on the couch.

"Hi," I sigh once I'm inside, locking the door.

"Hey," he barely mumbles, his attention deeply invested in the habitat of the hammerhead shark. Snorting I ruffle his hair and walk to the kitchen.

Dropping my keys on the kitchen table I walk behind my mother and wrap my arms around her shoulders. She was busy mixing what looked like mashed potatoes in a big pot. She jumps a little when I hold her.

"Scared me, Reese."

I rest my head on her shoulder and apologize. She pats my arm and turns her head a bit to kiss my cheek.

"How was work?" she asks in a more cheerful mood than usual, as I said she's lightening up to the situation.

"Good," I reply letting go to rummage in the fridge for something to drink.

She glances at me when I pull out half a Snapple and eyes me up and down for a moment.

"What?" I ask.

"Your brother made me promise not to tell you, but he demands that we find out who your…_friend_ is."

I roll my eyes and lean against the cold fridge shaking my head.

"He's so damn persistent," I gaze down at the Snapple fact under the top.

"I may not condone your relationship, but he is right you know."

"Right about what?" I ask tossing the top in the trash and setting the glass bottle down on the counter before putting my hands on my hips.

"You've been with this guy for how long and I don't even know his name."

Just the idea of telling my mother his name makes me a bit sick.

"You didn't care to know his name before," I state shaking my head, "And it's been 5 months."

6 months in 2 weeks. I wouldn't believe it if it wasn't happening to me.

"That's a stretch for you isn't it?"

Yes. But I don't give her the satisfaction of saying so. I finish my drink, throw it away and say, "food smells good," on my way out.

Alone in my room I strip myself of my work clothes and the minute I lay on my bed my phone starts to ring. It's Tia. I answer on the second ring.

"Did you hear about Bo-"

"Yea I heard," I reply.

"Joe told me that it was some guys from upstate, and they almost got Billy too."

I sit up and gasp, "He didn't tell me anything! Why does he tell you and not me?!" I exclaim.

"Billy told em' not to, I'm not supposed to tell you either but whatever, you're my best friend. Anyway, Joe's all pissed because they went to meet these guys without him. Whatever deal they had goin' on went wrong and they started shooting."

"What the fuck," I sigh rubbing my forehead.

"I know, and the cops are looking for them."

"Billy?!"

"And the rest of those idiots. They don't know it was them but you know, if anybody's shooting in this neighborhood they go to Billy first."

"Oh my god, this is nuts. He didn't say a word to me about any of this."

"Plausible deniability," is all she says in return.

"He told Joe he doesn't want you involved in anything and to never tell you anything."

"Well what about you? You seem to know everything."

"I'm not Billy Darley's girlfriend hon'."

It all makes sense, but it doesn't mean I like to be left completely in the dark.

"So do you know anything else or…" I trail off.

"Just that as of right now things are fucked. Joe-hold on a second." I hear the line click over for a second before she picks back up.

"Yea, I have to go, Joes on the other line."

"A-alright, call me back."

We hang up and I sit there in the dark staring at nothing; I just know she's completely right, things are fucked.


	17. Mine

**A/N:** **Sorry this took soooo long. The next one should be out fairly soon, that is if you all are still interested**

"Reese…Reese."

It wasn't until I felt a tap on my shoulder that I noticed I'd been standing in front of the copier staring off into space for who knows how long. I look to my right to see one of the attorneys standing beside me. I glance at him and jump a bit, glancing around to see him standing beside me.

"I'm sorry," I sigh shaking my head as I gathered the copies I was supposed to be bringing to my boss.

"It's fine. You look sad, everything okay?"

I give half a smile and nod, "I'm ok, just thinking about some stuff."

I look at him again, noticing for the first time the smirk on his face, those come hither eyes that I'm sure worked on the other secretaries. Turning back around I grab my papers and start to walk past him.

"Uh, Reese." He calls out to me. How does he even know my name?

I turn back to face him, he's holding out a piece of paper I must have dropped.

"Thanks."

The minute I was alone again, tasked with alphabetizing some old contacts at my desk, which was in the room just outside my boss's I made it a point to keep my phone off while I'm working. However, these past few days I decided against it since things at home have been a bit weird. And by things at home I mean all the crap with Billy and his friends. And by weird I mean I haven't seen him in almost a week and the one time I did see him he barely acknowledged I was there. He sends Joe to pick me up from work and he still doesn't give me any details about what's happening. The only reason I know anything is because of Tia.

Apparently the cops may or may not have evidence that could incriminate Billy and Bodie, who I think is still in the hospital. Billy goes to see him every day. Anyway, there also may or may not be a cop that Billy has in his pocket, who will see to it that this incriminating evidence does not exist and if it does he will make sure it doesn't exist.

I suppose until all of this is cleared up I'll be boyfriend-less.

So if I'm not with Tia after work I'm with Collin.

He'll come over almost once a week for dinner and just to hang out with my family. He and I have pretty much picked up where we left off. Since he's returned I've been splitting my time between Billy, him and Tia. Tia doesn't mind much that she gets the least bit of time because she's so caught up with Joe.

I've actively avoided telling Billy of the times Collin and I hang out. Not that I feel I have anything to hide, I just knew it wouldn't turn out any way but horrible. I however, on this particular day wasn't expecting to see Collin sitting on the front steps of the apartment. Usually he's upstairs waiting on my couch. When Joe pulls up to the front he glances at me then back to Collin who'd stood up when he saw us.

Collin stares at me past Joe and I look back then to Joe when I feel him staring at me.

"Don't look at me like that." I sigh gathering my purse and pushing the door open.  
>"Bye Joe."<p>

I walk around the front of the car, ignoring the fact that he doesn't pull off until Collin and I are inside.

"No one's upstairs?" I ask taking out my keys as we walk up the steps to my apartment.

"Nah, ya mom went to the store with Jase."

"You waited here?" I ask glancing behind me at him.

He nods, "Yea, wanted to smoke and I knew you'd be here soon," He shrugs.

I don't let on to the nervousness I feel from the fact that Joe had seen us come up here together. I bet he's on his way to squeal to Billy right this second.

"How was work?" Collin asks as I lock the door behind us inside.

"Alright," I shrug walking to my room with Collin behind me.

As I take off my shoes he says.

"So I know you must know about all the shit Darley's got em'self into."

I glance over my shoulder at him and shrug.  
>"Not really, he won't tell me anything, Tia says he wants me to have plausible deniability."<p>

Collin snorts, a sarcastic look in his eyes.  
>"No one has plausible deniability in this neighborhood. Not when it comes to him."<p>

I ignore his jab and grab some clothes to change into. Stepping inside my small cramped closet I change where Collin can't see. When I come back out I sit on my bed beside him and check my phone.

"Want to watch cartoons?" I ask, my eyes still on the phone as I do. Still nothing from Billy.

Collin grabs my remote, making himself comfortable beside me as he turns on the TV and starts flipping through the channels.

**Busy? –R**

He doesn't answer me for a very long time. When he does Collin and I are almost sleep, my mother had already come back, made dinner and fed all of us. Collin and I made it back to my room after watching a movie with Jase, just in time to pass out.

Curled up in Collin's arms I jolt awake to see it's about 1:30 am and my phone is vibrating so loud I could hear it in my dreams. Billy is one of those people that send single worded texts, it's the most annoying thing ever.

**No –B**

I stare at the message for a few seconds before typing back.

**Is everything ok? –R **

He takes almost 10 minutes to reply, ignoring me those long ten minutes.

**Y wouldn't it b? –B**

Rolling my eyes I sit up, pushing away Collin's grip on my hip. Sitting up I dial Billy's number; even for his aloof nature I knew better that his text had more meaning.

He answers on the 5th ring.

"Because I haven't heard from you in days," I don't even say hello.

He remains silent for a while then answers.

"I been busy."

I could ring his fucking neck.  
>"Oh? Because I could have sworn you just said you weren't busy."<p>

"I'm not busy now." He grunts.

I can hear commotion in the background, I immediately assume he's at the bar. I sigh and close my eyes.

"I'm trying so hard not to be that girl Billy."

"What girl?" he asks sounding bored.

"The girl that calls her boyfriend complaining and whining."

"Then don't." he retorts smartly.

"I…" I take a deep breath and hold it before releasing the anger building slowly.  
>"Fine. Can I see you? Would you like to see me?"<p>

"I'm tired."

"Come on are you fucking serious. I can hear the bar Billy!"

"I don't wanna hear this shit Ree-"At this very moment I've never been so terrified. Because at the same time Billy is talking Collin emerges from my room rubbing his eyes. He doesn't notice I'm on the phone and asks in the quiet hallway of my apartment.

"Why'd you get out a'bed?"

I look at him and shake my head no, pointing frantically to my phone. He blinks a few times and looks at me before nodding and going toward the bathroom. I pray Billy hasn't heard, but know from the dead silence on his end that he did.

"Reese." He says my name slowly in an even, bone chilling tone.

I clear my throat and wander from my apartment hallway to the hallway of our complex to keep from waking anyone up, closing the front door behind me as quietly as I could.

"Yea?" I ask just above a whisper.

"Whose bed ya in?"

"I-I'm not I-"

"Don't fuckin' lie t'me." He snarls making me shiver.

"It was Collin, he's s-stayin' over the uh-for the night."

"Ya better be jokin'."

"Billy he's my friend it's not-"

"Be outside in five minutes."

With that the line went dead. I tried calling him back several times, pacing the hallway back and forth frantically for five minutes. And another half-minute passes before I hear that heavy engine outside. A car door slams loudly and I leap down the steps two at a time to meet him charging through the lobby door.

"Billy, Billy, Billy." I call out holding my hands out to stop him. His eyes are dark and focused on me.  
>"Listen to me it's not what you think."<p>

Wrapping his hand around my forearm he pulls me into him a low growl erupting from his chest when our bodies collide.

"And what the _fuck _do I think-huh?!" He explodes, his voice going higher when he yelled fuck. I tremble, staring at him in shock, scared to move let alone speak. His reaction is at best an over-reaction and at worst, the end of our relationship.  
>"Ya think I'm fuckin' stupid?"<p>

"No. Stop it." I hiss trying to yank myself away from him. A few neighborhood dogs bark at the sound of his loud and ragged voice; nosy neighbors flicker on their lights and peak out their blinds to see what the commotion is about.

"You think I'm fuckin' playin' wit'ya Reese." He brings his other hand up, pointing his finger at me and digging the tip of his index and middle fingers against my temple. My head tilts to the side as he slightly mushes me, tearing me apart from the inside out. I'm immediately bought back to my childhood. When my father would be so drunk and take out all his problems on my mother and I; bullying me and mushing me in corners.

"Billy stop it. I'm not doing anything with him, I wouldn't do that." I snap smacking his hand away, backing closer to the steps leading inside.

"So what the fuck is he here for huh? Sleepin' in ya fuckin' be no less!" he asks stalking toward me.

"He's here Billy! He talks to me! That's it, he's my best friend!" I can feel the tears building.

"Don't gimme that bullshit and cut that cryin' shit out."

Before I can reply Collin emerges from the building, moving behind me so his chest is against my back.

My eyes go wide when I see Billy's eyes lock on my friend. I can't imagine him seeing anything but red right now.

"Reese, everything okay?"

Collin puts his hand on my shoulder and though it's the tiniest of gestures it's the wrong one.

"Collin I'm-"

"Mind ya fuckin' business," Billy spits.

I notice him advancing a bit in our direction and immediately do the same, putting my hands on his chest.

"Let em' go sweetheart, he's got somethin' on his mind. Let the man talk."

"Billy, come on let's just go." I grasp his huge bicep and attempt to pull him to his car, trying to speak over Collin's taunting.  
>"I'll go with you."<p>

Billy hauls me behind him and charges toward Collin. Hovering over him, dwarfing him by about 6 inches. But standing a few steps higher, Collin evens the difference. Not showing an ounce of fear when Billy approaches him.

"The only reason you ain't bleedin' out is because of her. You remember that shit."

I manage to squeeze myself between them and push Collin back. He chuckles and takes a step back. I turn to face Billy, his eyes still focused on Collin.

"Billy. Let's go okay?" I say softly, my voice still trembling. I put my hands on his cheeks and make him look at me.  
>"I'm with you, let's go," I whisper in reassurance him.<p>

His eyes finally land on mine. His face is still hard as stone but I can see him relax a small fraction when our eyes meet.

"Now." He replies sternly with no room for questioning.

I nod and turn back to face Collin. He's still staring at Billy when I call his name.

"I'll call you tomorrow, please just let it go."

He doesn't say anything but gives a curt nod. Billy starts to walk to his car, calling my name roughly. I turn around and follow behind him, feeling like a child in deep shit.

The moment we pull away in the car I sigh. Feeling more relaxed knowing he isn't close enough to flip out and shoot Collin.

"That was stupid Billy."

"No what's stupid is you let'n that fucker sleep in ya bed."

"He's not a fucker, he's my friend and you were being a jealous prick."

He glances at me his eyes ablaze.  
>"You watch ya fuckin' mouth Reese."<p>

"And if I don't?" I ask bitingly, metaphorically butting heads with him without an ounce of hesitation.

His face was priceless, if I wasn't pissed off I'd be a little scared but also amused because of how red he got in that small matter of seconds. He looked like he wanted to knock my lights out, and looked even more pissed off because he knew he wouldn't do anything. He doesn't say anything but squeezes the wheel so tight I could hear the leather ripple beneath his callouses.

"And so what if I let him sleep in my bed?" I ask glaring at him.

The car surges past a stop sign and Billy doesn't even look to see the oncoming traffic swerve to avoid an accident.

"Would you look at the road!?" I scream.

"What the fuck you mean so what? You whine about other bitches kissin' my cheek but let the next dude sleep in ya fuckin' bed? Does that make sense to you Reese?" he asks roughly, not screaming but speaking loud enough to make up for it.

"There's a difference Billy! Collin doesn't have the intention of fucking me, all those _bitches _do!"

He snorts, glancing at me with a disgustingly arrogant smirk on his lips.

"You think he don't wan'a fuck ya?"

"He's not like that Billy."

"If you think that then ya more naïve than I thought."

My eyes go wide, "I'm not naïve you're just a jealous idiot! You think you know everything and you don't! You don't know Collin!"

"I don't hafta know him, he's got a dick and you got a great ass and big tits."

I don't reply right away, just stare at him with my mouth open and eyes wide. Noticing I haven't spoken he looks at me then looks back at the road. We're nearing his apartment and all I want is to be back in my own bed. After getting over the initial shock I sit back in my seat and cross my arms over my chest, staring at the street.

"What ya don't got noth'n slick t'say?" he asks with a small hint of amusement in his tone.

Just as we pull up to the parking lot I ask.

"So that's ultimately the only reason you even spoke to me isn't it?"

After parking the car he turns to face me, sighing heavily as he did.

"Come on, we can talk inside."

"No. Tell me the truth now."

"Why so you can run away cry'n. No."

Shaking my head I clear my throat and mutter, "Wow…I'm really fucking stupid aren't I. My mother told me this would happen and I said no…he's different because I'm a fucking moron that can't spot a bad thing when it fucking smacks me in the face."

"What was that?" he asks leaning a bit closer and I can tell from that one remark that he thinks it's all funny.

"Forget it."

I get out of his car quickly, walking into the complex with Billy hot on my trail. From the first floor I could hear the loud speaker system blasting from his apartment. When he unlocks the door and opens it a plume of smoke engulfs my senses and I fan it away from my face.

I feel Billy's arm wrap around my waist once we're inside the crowded apartment. Nearly being knocked over if it wasn't for him standing behind me.

I yank myself away from his embrace and stalk toward his bedroom. I had to push through I'm not sure how many girls that most likely found out where Billy's room was and decided to wait outside it like the hungry groupies they were. But who am I to even judge them, I'm Billy's number one groupie at this point in time. Or I was…

Billy walks in his room behind me and slams the door shut before locking it.

"So you have a party and don't invite me either?" I ask standing in the middle of his room.

Slowly he closes his eyes and sighs.  
>"You're doin' too much right now Reese."<p>

He leans back against the wall near his closet and rubs his hands over his scalp.

"Too much? Too much would be to ignore you for weeks and act as if you don't exist then show up at your apartment screaming and threatening your friends."

"So what? What you want me to do, huh, 'cause I ain't apologizin'. Ya friend shouldn'ta been there in the first place."

"You!" I start to yell but stop and take a very deep breath, "Okay Billy."

He stands up straight and cocks his head back a bit.

"Okay Billy?" he asks walking toward me. When we're face to face, my eyes focused on his chest and his breath blowing on my forehead he wraps his hands around my hips.

I turn my head away and sigh.  
>"That's it? I gotta be honest baby I don't know if I should be happy as shit or worried."<p>

"Why would you be worried? You're not worried about me any other time."

"Is that what you think?" he places a kiss on my neck and I push him away.

He moves back and grasps my hips harshly, yanking me against him. I try to push him away again but he grasps my arms tightly and holds me there.  
>"Stop." He grouses glaring me dead in the eyes.<p>

"No, get off me," I hiss fighting his grip until he let me go and pushed me back against his bed. I grab one of his pillows and toss it roughly at him before tumbling off the bed unceremoniously until I'm on my feet again. I cross my arms over my chest and glare at him.

"I want to go home. I shouldn't have come here."

"No. Ya wanted to see me so fuckin' bad."

"Well I changed my mind." I reply looking away from him as his response about my body plays in my mind. I know he only said it to piss me off and get under my skin about Collin, but it doesn't hurt any less.

"Too bad." He retorts earnestly as he shoves off his leather jacket, tossing it on the floor in a random corner of the room. I start to walk to the door, not really surprised when he grabbed my arm and snatched me back. I open my mouth to curse him out but am interrupted by his mouth smashing onto mine.

"Get-" I try to maneuver myself away from him, twisting my arms from his grip, only to have him hold them tighter.

I scream against his lips, pushing against his massive chest as he uses his weight to trap me against the door.

"Billy!" I whine resorting to turn my head from his.

He kisses my cheek a few times as I make it impossible for him to reach my lips.

"Get the fuck off me Billy, I'm not playin-fuck!"

His lips make work of kissing and sucking my neck. The spot that he knows is pretty much lethal is attacked. I tremble a little from the sensation, unable to fight as my legs turn to jelly.

My groans and screams of anger quickly turn to moans of pleasure when he uses my moment of weakness to slide his slimy hands between my legs. Since I was only in my pajamas he has perfect access and only had to rub up against my lips and clit one time before I was writhing and gripping his shirt. I try to fight the sounds of pleasure that tear from my throat but can't.

Aggravated at my lack of self-control I try to fight him again, reaching down to yank his hand away from me. Grunting he full on bites my neck and grabs both my hands, holding them beside my head against the door.

"Stop." He says softly, looking me in the eyes as he moves even closer, impossibly close. His middle is pressed against mine and he makes me look him in the eye with the little space between us.

I inhale deeply, my voice shaky as I try to decipher for myself whether I wanted this or not.

"Ya still want to go?" he asks grinding his hips into me. My eyes roll behind my head and I bite my bottom lip hard.

Moving his mouth to my ear he nibbles on the top of it and grouses, "Answer me."

"Mmnh," I whimper in defeat, "No."

I don't look at him, not wanting to see the arrogant look on his face from my submission. He shoves his hands beneath my thin sweats and yanks them down, realizing I'm not wearing underwear for the first time.

"Look at me," His suddenly very sharp voice snaps. I open my eyes and look at him, my eyes hooded and body slumped. His face is burdened with anger and I almost close my eyes again so I don't have to see.

"Where's ya fuckin' unda'wear?"

"I-I don't sleep with them-ah!"

I scream in mostly shock when I feel his fingers collectively slap my lips.

He grunts, his eyes boring into mine. I whine in pain and pleasure when he does it again. My voice shuddering as I try to speak.

He slides his fingers inside, gliding them along my already wet slit.  
>"Ya fuckin' sleep in a bed with some other fuckin' guy with no panties on?" he asks roughly. I bite my lip and hold back a moan. "Don't do that shit again, ya hear me?"<p>

"Unh huh," I nod.

"Don't fuckin' lie t'me."

"I'm won't, Billy".

"Who ya all wet for then huh?" he asks, his tone softening a little but still remaining authoritative.

My jaw drops and I let out quivering breaths, "You Billy, please."

"Please what?" I look him dead in the eyes and reply.

"Fuck me."

He smirks devilishly, still toying between my legs, making me crazy. Using his free hand he reaches up and wraps his fist around my hair until he's got a tight grip and yanks on it to tilt my head back. I hiss and close my eyes, trying to ignore my sore scalp. Smirking he does it again, pulling on it even as my head is all the way back.

"Down." He nods to the floor.

Slowly I lower myself to the floor. Not waiting for more instruction but immediately undoing his pants, letting them fall down. Tracing the length of him with my tongue I make him just as wet as me, jerking him as well until he's rock hard. When I continue to lick and massage him Billy catches my gaze and says.

"Stop playing with it."

His words shoot straight to my middle and I open my mouth. I'm about to slide my lips over his length when he forces it in on his own. I gasp and choke a little, pulling back to take a breath.

I glare up at him, wanting to wipe the smug smile off his face.

"I'm sorry, ga'head baby"

Only he doesn't sound sorry, he sounds more amused than anything as the smile on his face hasn't faltered at all.

Closing my eyes I take him again as far as I can without gagging. My mouth is stretched almost all the way and I have to use my hand to satisfy the last few inches. Jerking him in rhythm with each bob of my head.

When I'm enjoying more than I'm wanting to smack him, my enthusiasm builds and I start to suck harder, twisting my hand as I jerk him harder as well.

He starts moaning my name under his breath, exciting me to no end. So I take my time and build the courage to take him all. Sucking his shaft all the way until his head is tickling the back of my throat. I suppress a gag and use my free hand to massage his balls.

"Ah shhit Reese!" Billy moans panting. His hand immediately grips the back of my head, moving it in circles around his dick, which is still lodged down my throat.

"Fffuck!"

I put my hands on his thighs when he doesn't let go right away, pushing back to make him stop. He gets the idea after a moment and let's my head go. I move my head back until just the tip is resting on my tongue. Swallowing a bit of spit I take a breath and go back to sucking. Making him moan like I wanted.

"Take it deep again baby, hold it." He rushes out grasping the back of my head and pushing me down on him impatiently.

When he's sheathed all the way in my mouth I try to pull away. Unable to keep him there for so long. But he doesn't let me, whispering in the most soothing voice.

"Don't move, don't move. Just let me..." He trails off before he starts to literally fuck my mouth. My hands fly to his thighs and I smack them as I try to move my head back.

I moan and groan around his phallus and try to wiggle my head away.

"Take my dick Reese, all the way sweetheart I'm about t'fuckin' come."

I fight my gag reflex and fail tremendously. I wind up coughing and gagging with him still inside. I pinch his thigh this time but he keeps going, fucking my throat until he shudders and his entire body stiffens.

"Fuck! Oh fuck!"

I finally manage to pull away, just as he starts to come. I cough and wipe the spit dribbling from my mouth and down my chin. And in the same moment he starts to explode. His dick spurts stream after stream of come, all over my chin and lips.

Instinctively I clean my mouth with my tongue, licking and swallowing until my face was clean. Billy stands there watching with a very pleased grin on his face as he huffed out strangled breaths.

"I missed you."

The smile I was starting to feel grow is cut short by his comment. The redemption from the whole fucked up situation I was starting to feel a moment ago is gone now. My mood is just as blown as his dick which makes me feel even worse.

"Unbelievable."

In 3 seconds he manages to ruin everything. Forgiveness wasn't exactly the feeling I harbored for him to begin with but I was getting there. That's all fucked now.

"Jesus Billy."

"Jesus Billy? What the fuck did I do now?" he asks turning to face me.

I pace the room a little, knowing yet again he wouldn't let me out right away.

"You know exactly how to make a girl feel special. It figures the only time you'd even mention missing me is when I'm fucking on my knees...typical."

"Are you fuckin' kiddin' me?" He sighs sounding as fed up as I am.

"No!" I exclaim, "You're such a dick!"

Pulling up his pants he buttons them and looks none too pleased about it.

I shake my head as he starts to walk over to me. A determined look in his eyes.

"Don't Billy." I warn.

"It ain't fuckin' typical, stop assuming you know every fuckin thought I got."

"Oh so what you missed spending time with me? Because it seems like you only care when there's someone else or some sex involved."

He narrows his eyes at me but remains silent for a while. I glare at him, waiting impatiently for his next move. Just as I'm about to walk around him and leave he says.

"I ain't good at this shit Reese, you know that."

"Yea I know that, but there's nothing we can do if you truly do not have feelings for me."

"How many times I gotta tell you I'm serious about you an' me?"

"Until I believe it." I retort.

He inhales deeply and sighs. He shakes his head and I feel the dread that is my expecting rejection. I fully expect him to tell me to fuck off. And I guess that's part if the issue. I don't trust him not to.

He steps closer and I know he's about to kiss me, but I step back.

"No. You tell me." Putting my fist against his chest I give him my sternest look.

He drops his head and grunts. Rubbing his hand across his head he looks away from me.

"I-I don't fuckin' know what ya want me to say."

"I want you to tell me how you feel about me." I focus on him, watching him closely as he fidgets and fights himself.

"I like ya a'right...maybe more than like, _maybe_. And that's when ya ain't pissin' me off, runnin' ya mouth and assumin' the worst."

I want to smile but I fight it, "and?"

He cuts his eyes at me before he takes a step back and shoves his hand in his pockets.

"And...you..."

I wait more patiently than before, hanging on every word as he develops his thoughts.

"Ya fuckin'...make me laugh…n'I forget about all the other bullshit. I just wanted to fuck you at first, you know that. But even then I...when you left I wanted you t'stay. I want ya around."

"You do?" I ask my voice getting caught in my throat.

He looks up at me and nods meekly. The embarrassment he's feeling is palpable, practically dripping off him. And it only makes me want to kiss him and hug him. And this is how Billy pulls me in.

"And all that stuff about my body?"

"I didn't mean that...fuck...you know I think ya beautiful you don't need me t'tell you th-"

He jumps in shock when I throw myself at him. Unable to keep myself from it any longer I kiss his lips, and wrap my arms around his neck. He holds me back hesitantly but eventually is clinging me to him as he kisses me back.

When we need to breathe he leans back and watches me carefully holding my cheek. Both of my cheeks are hurting from smiling but I can't help it. And as he stares at me, that adoring look that only Billy could give; I feel that feeling again. That one I felt the night he left me here. The one that makes me forget about everyone and everything else. The one that makes me want to pour my heart out to this man and hold him in my arms all night…all the time.

"Billy I-"

"Stay here for a while."

He says stroking the backs of his fingers against my face.

"A while?" I ask, "How long is that?"

He shrugs and I smile.

"Fine. I don't have clothes though."

With that mischievous smirk he replies, "You don't need any."

Smirking I look down as I play with the collar of his t-shirt.

"Oh? Why's that?"

He starts to walk us back toward the bed, still smirking as he says.

"You know why."

We fall back on the bed and Billy plants kisses down my neck as his hands roam to the waist of my pants. Just as he starts to slide them down there's a hard, obnoxious knock on the door. Billy stands up quickly leaving me panting. Unlocking the door he throws it open looking pissed.

"The fuck you think ya doin'?"

"Someone told me you were here." It was a woman's voice.  
>"You busy?" She asks trying to peer in the room.<p>

Rolling my eyes I peel off my shirt and throw it on the floor, then slide out of my pants, kick them off and wait impatiently. If she didn't leave in another 15 seconds I'd make sure she did myself.

"Yea."

Alicia fucking Bennitt! She's a fucking dirt bag, literally sleeps with everyone and judges other women for doing exactly the same thing. I can't stand her. We've hated each other since middle school when she kissed my first real boyfriend just because he didn't like her.

"Who ya doin? Andrea? Heard she was hangin' around the bar the other night."

Another one of the neighborhood hoes, except I heard Andrea does it for money now. She was and possibly still is the prettiest girl in Boston. Her curly black hair and thick features made most men here weak at the knees. If she wasn't such a mean bitch like Alicia who knows where she'd be.

"Good f'her."

With that he slams the door shut on her shocked face.

"You have a lot of fans huh?"

"No." He replies gruffly as he yanks off his shirt as he gets on the bed.

"Yea right, you have girls-"I gasp when he grabs my ankle, dragging me so I'm right beneath him, "Girls don't know how to act when it comes to you."

He leans down his brawny right arm, encasing me with his body. A smirk falls on his face and he raises one sarcastic brow at my statement.

"Oh don't even!" I exclaim pinching his side.

"Shits true as rain baby, you lose ya fuckin' mind when I'm around."

I roll my eyes, it isn't completely untrue. He makes me lose my mind alright.

I snort, "_Shits true as rain baby_," mimicking him.

He smiles wider and both brows shoot up in surprise.  
>"Shut the fuck up."<p>

His smile makes me feel amazing, especially knowing that I put it there. Wrapping my arms around his neck I kiss that smile. He lays his body against mine slowly, keeping his weight off me as his lips softly suck and prod mine.

Sliding my hands up his side I stroke his warm skin up to his shoulders then back down to the belt of his pants. When I tug on it he seizes kissing me for a moment, moving back an inch or two to put his hand on my stomach just beneath my shirt.

"You still want it?"

His hand slides up slowly to cover my breast. I kiss him sloppily once and nod.  
>"Yea, I want you."<p>

He stops moving and stares at me. I bite my lip and am about to ask what was wrong but he kisses me before I can.

"Say it again," he says against my lips.

Cupping his cheeks I kiss him back momentarily, closing my eyes as I say, "I want you, Billy."

He kisses down my face, tenderly pecking my cheek then my neck.  
>"Again." He muffles.<p>

I moan when he starts to suck on my neck.  
>"I want you."<p>

Grasping my hands he lifts them above my head and presses them against the mattress, still trailing kisses down my body.

When I feel he's going down, which I've noticed he obviously very much enjoys I grab his arm and urge him back toward me.

"I want to feel _you_."

He looks up at me and. raises his brow.  
>"You don't want me to?" he asks.<p>

"Yea but I want you more right now, don't make me wait." I damn near beg.

He doesn't hesitate this time, he sits up on his knees and immediately starts unbuckling his belt, then makes quick work of getting out of his pants and boxers. I spread my bent legs and watch as his eyes trail up and down my body. I do the same, smirking when I see how hard he is for me.

Crawling closer he lowers himself between my legs again and kisses me softly.

"You wet for me still?" he asks reaching down to grab himself, rubbing the head of his dick against my lips and clit.

"Uhm-hum," I nod.

He moves down and prods my opening repeatedly, teasing me. Every time I think he's going to put it in he doesn't.

"Jesus, Billy quit i-ah!"

My nails dig into his back when he abruptly slides into me. Slowly, but forcefully he gives me every inch until he bottoms. I try to keep my eyes open, especially when he starts to slowly thrust in and out, but my eyes roll behind my head the moment he does.

His movements are strong and deliberate. For a minute I forgot all about his dozens of flunkies just outside the door as I moan his name and exhale loudly in pleasure.

It isn't until he forcefully jabs at that one spot, making me gasp and scream loud enough to fill the entire room. I grip his lower back tightly, holding him against me. Billy slows a bit and kisses my lips.

"You okay?" He asks breathlessly.

"Uh-uh huh, don't stop." I whimper, "Fuck like tha-ah!"

He leverages my legs back a little bit further and rolls his hips into me in big circles.

I feel fucking euphoric, every sensation he's drawing out of me is amazing, yet fleeting up until the point that he does it again. And I never want the feeling to end.

With his head beside mine he whispers for me to say his name.

"Bill_-ll-_y! Fuck!" I throw my hands to the bed and grip the sheets tight when he grinds himself inside of me moving up and down now.

"H-h-oh my fucking guh-I'm gonna fuckin...nnhmm."

He growls through clenched teeth, slowing down a bit, making his strokes long and deep. Taking his time as he explores every inch of me.

His blue eyes are piercing my half lidded ones for a moment and I try my hardest not to come apart at that moment. God he's beautiful. Most wouldn't use those words to describe my Billy, but he is. Truly. Everything, from the scars that littered his body to the swirls of black ink. That intense look he has when we're like this makes me feel like for once something in my life is right. And I remember why I love him.

I gasp loudly, a sharp inhale that could have been mistaken for pain. My eyes roll to the back of my head and I slap down hard on Billy's back, digging my nails in his skin as my teeth sink deep into his shoulder. He stops almost immediately, leaning back to look at me he puts his hand on one of my flustered cheeks.

"I hurt ya?" he asks, then kisses me softly on the lips then my nose.

"I-I'm fine." I pant staring into his eyes again.

He smiles at me and licks over his lips as his hand moves back over my forehead.

"Want me t'go slow?" he asks.

And I'm not sure if it's because of the sex, actually it makes sense that this would be the reason, but I felt extremely emotional. I wanted to hug him close and kiss him and tell him I love him. But the more logical part of my brain knew that would be a mistake. A colossal, huge, very bad mistake.

I can just see his face now, confused, pissed off, and most of all scared. Fuck, I'm terrified and I haven't even said it out loud.

Moving my hands to his neck I rub it and nod.  
>"Roll over." I say nodding to our side.<p>

His smile widens in excitement and he grips my hips tightly before rolling onto his back with me still wrapped around him.

Hovering about him I plant a quick kiss to his lips then sit up, placing my hands on his chest. Keeping eye contact I start to move my hips back and forth very slowly. Building up speed as the sensation grew more and more pleasurable. I'd roll my hips around in whatever odd pattern that made me feel absolutely amazing. Billy of course enjoyed this too, as it's not all the time I get to see his face morphed in ecstasy.

With his hands glued to my breasts or hips he groaned and moaned and wasn't able to bury his face in the crook of my neck when he really liked something I did. I got to see every time his eyes rolled behind his head and all the O faces he made.

"Shhit Reese, c'mere." He grunts.

I lean down above him, our chests pressed up against one another's. He grabs my ass and holds me still as his hips drive up into me slowly, at the end of each movement he'd thrust extra hard.

"Fuck Billy...shit." I whisper staring him in the eyes, biting my bottom lip and trying my hardest to not be so loud.

"Ya so fuckin' beautiful." He kisses my chin and groans, using his leverage on my hips to make me bounce harder on him.

Keeping my mouth shut I moan from deep in my throat until I couldn't hold it anymore. I let out long drawn out exhalations, moving my hips back into his thrusts on my own.

"Fuck yea, ride my dick baby." I sit back up and roll my hips forward and back, my mouth hanging open and my eyes just as wide.

"Billy," I pant as I feel my body start to tremble from the inside out. And as that moment drew nearer, that moment where my mind was completely empty I try to get him to let me go. I'm going to say it, I know I will.

Grasping his hands I push them away and try to lift up off him. Grunting like an animal he sits up and grabs my arms, roughly throwing them behind my back. He holds me there and makes me keep moving.

"Ya runnin' from me?" He asks.

My eyes roll behind my head and I shake my head no.

"Good." He lets go of my arms and moves his hands back to my butt. I bury my face in his neck and cry out loudly when he starts to repeatedly yank me into his body. I hug him tightly, my arms and legs wrapped around his back, my nails digging into it.

"Billly, I'm-ah-oh fuck!" my whole body shakes and I carelessly, without thought, scream at the top of my lungs.

"Aaangh!"

I gasp deeply and let go.

Every nerve in my body that was tensed had released fiercely. It started at my legs, shaking and quivering uncontrollably. He doesn't move any less or more, but moves his hand between us to rub my clit. And very much out of my control I feel liquid leaking out of me. I gasp harshly, staring down between us as I start to come down, I'm in complete shock and horror. Billy's eyes are glued between us as well, watching his now glistening dick piston in and out of me.

"Yes, fuck! Come on my dick!"

As if a burst of energy hit him he holds me against him puts me on my back. Hovering above me he loses all abandon and pounds into me so hard the squirting doesn't stop. He keeps stimulating that spot and I can't control the loud screams coming from my mouth.

Billy's eyes are transfixed between my legs. He likes it, from the look on his face I'd go as far as to say he loves it. He bites his lip hard and gives me one more rough push before he slides out.

I gasp and ask, "What are you doi-"

I get my answer when he lowers his head between my legs.

"No Billy-fuck stop!"

He licks me literally allover, attaching his mouth to my lips and sucking hard as his tongue continues to flick against my clit and labia.

"Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck fuck!"

My legs tremble again and I hold the back if his head against me. He moves his head around licking me in circles before he sucks one last time, stretching my skin before letting to in a quick snap.

I quiver and groan when he does it again, as if to make sure he got every drop.

"You taste so fuckin' amazin', wanna taste it?" He asks tapping the head of his dick against my lips, still very hard.

Before I can say anything he kisses me hard, our teeth scraping as his tongue slides against mine. I kiss him back, letting the taste fill my mouth. In the same breath Billy slides inside me roughly.

I gasp and shake a little.

"Fuck Billy." I pant moving my lips from his.

He moans deeply, his face pressed against the side of mine.

"This is all for me ain't it baby?" He asks.

I kiss his lips softly and nod.

Sitting up on his knees so he's hovering above me he grasps my thighs and begins to drive into me as roughly as he did before. Only now I was so sensitive I was on the verge of coming again when he moved at an almost inhuman pace.

"Come again for me." He pants.

"Billy I ca-I can't," I pant.

He doesn't say anything but makes sure his thrusts are deep enough to touch that spot again.

"Billy!" I moan, "Fuck you, oh shit!

Letting go of one of my thighs he presses his thumb against my clit and rubs it while still fucking me hard. It only takes a matter of minutes before I feel it again.

Tossing my head back I close my eyes as my whole body stiffens and contracts.

"Right there, right there Billy!"

"Mmhm!" He grunts not faltering for a second.

And I let go. It's not as big as before more than just enough considering it was like the 2nd time tonight. I don't realize until I feel the wet sheets beneath my thigh that I've squirted again.

Laying back against me Billy pounds into me until he finds his own release. I'm moaning still as the last effects of my orgasm wear off, panting and gasping for breath. Billy lays almost flat on top of me as he jerks and quivers while he empties himself in the condom.

I hold him to me as we breathe heavy, trying to catch our breath. I can feel his heart start to slow down when I say the words. As I rub the scratch marks I left on his back and he planting small kisses all over my collarbone, I inhale deeply and let it out.

"Billy, I'm in love with you"

He stops breathing, stops moving and in half a second I feel his heart hammering against my chest. He stays still for a little while, it isn't until I call his name that he responds.

"Billy." I whisper.

He sits up so he can look down at me. His eyes are intense and boring into mine.

"Why you say that?"

I open my mouth and close it again looking away from him, "because I am."

"Yea but why?"

"I-I just...do, you want a list of reasons?"

He nods, his eyes searching mine.

I think for a minute and sigh, "Because you actually care about me, and not just me but your friends. And you do it because it's right and because you want to, not to be able to say you did it. And you're so thoughtful and sweet when no one's looking. I love your face when I walk in a room, and the second I see you I lose my breath. Even when you piss me off I try to imagine not being with you and the thought fucking terrifies me now. I need you. And not because you take care of me or because you're nice to me, I just...I don't feel right when you're not around and I really miss you when you leave. That's why I was so pissed about not seeing you earlier."

His heart is still beating fast as he stares down at me.

"I love you, and I need you."

I cup his cheek and inhale deeply, "And it's okay if...if you don't love me back, I understand it may be different for you-"

He cuts me off with a soft kiss. When he pulls away he's got a big grin in his face.

"Say it again."

"I love you, Billy."

He kisses me again, "Again."

"I love you." I start to smile myself, watching how his eyes lit up when I first said it.

After another kiss he sighs and wraps his arms around me.

"I can't say it yet, okay?"

"But you do?" I ask excitedly.

He gives me a deadly serious stare then nods just once.

"For real?" I ask.

"Yea."

I giggle like a dummy and wrap my arms around his neck, hugging him close before I press kisses all over his face. He lets me roll him over so I'm on top of him and kiss him like I do when he makes me immensely happy.

He groans like he doesn't like it, but I know he loves it. When I'm satisfied I look down at him, my arms on either side of his head.

"You know you're absolutely never getting rid of me now."

He holds my hips, rubbing up and down them.

"Good, 'cause I ain't lettin' ya go nowhere no matter how pissed ya get at me."

I smile and brush my thumb against his eyebrow.

He smiles back at me and shakes his head, "Get up, I gotta kick those fuckers out."

I sit up and gently let his flaccid dick slide out.

"Can I help?" I ask excitedly.

He shakes his head no, "You don't got no fuckin' clothes."

Rolling my eyes I get off the bed and go to his dresser where I knew his t-shirts and boxers were. He watches with his arms behind his head as I slide on his clothes.

"You just want all them girls to see ya in my boxers."

I look back at him with a smirk on my face, not replying.

"No. I don't need t'punch some bitch in her face t'night." He retorts sternly as he sits up as well.

"Oh come oon, I'll just go get something to drink while you kick them out. And when everyone's gone I'll help clean up."

He rolls his eyes at me and gives a skeptical shake of his head as he slides on his jeans, letting them hang low on his hips.

"Trouble maker." He mumbles.

I try to make the best of my messy, sex hair. Taming it as best as I could and just throwing it up in a messy bun. Billy reaches behind him and grasps my hand when he opens the bedroom door. I squeeze his hand, feeling my heart clench at the fact that he even grabbed mine.

The moment we were on the other side of the door all eyes were on us. Hard eyes. All the women who were sitting outside the door, women I grew up knowing and some I didn't, but who obviously knew Billy, gawked at me. It was funny I guess. Some of the males in attendance looked at me as well. If they didn't smell the sex on us it was more than obvious just by looking at us what we'd been doing for the last hour or so.

Billy pushed through people, rudely telling them to get out as he did. And there was no hesitation, once Billy said it, they all began to move out. He made his way eventually toward the stereo system that was playing the extremely loud rap song and turned it off, still gripping my hand. Everyone looked directly at us, including Alicia Bennett and her friends. She was actually glaring at me, her mouth dropped when she first saw us walk over together. Then her eyes went to our hands and she looked even more shocked and pissed off.

"Party's over, get the fuck out." Billy says loud enough for everyone to hear.

No one groans or moans they just gradually herd out the door. I stare on in awe, still holding Billy's hand as they left. When majority of the people left I start to make my way to the kitchen for some water.

When I try to walk away Billy grasps my hand and holds me back.

"I'm just getting water." I whisper close to his ear.

He nods and lets me go, watching closely and seeing to it that everyone left.

It wasn't until I actually got in the kitchen that I saw Bodie. I gasp when I see him. By no means at all are we friends, Billy would despise me having anything more than a cordial relationship with any of his friends. Not that he doesn't trust them around me, but more so that he doesn't think they'd be a good influence on me.

But for whatever reason when I saw him I hugged him.

"You're okay?" I ask patting his shoulder.

He nods, "Yea, I'm good," he eyes me up and down raising a brow, "Billy know you out here?" he asks sounding a bit worried.

Nodding I reach behind him to grab a bottle of water that was on the table.  
>"Just getting some water," I reply with a shrug.<p>

Before I can say anything else Billy comes in, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me into his chest. Bodie's eyes go wide as he watches us.

"You too man." Billy says nodding his head to the door.

I swat Billy's arm, "Don't be rude."

"Nah, it's ok Reese," he chuckles half-heartedly, "Yo Billy we need to talk tomorrow." He says as he takes one more sip of the beer in his hand and makes his way out.

Billy nods and the moment we're alone in the small kitchen he moves his hand up to grope my breast.

"Stop" I laugh squirming away only to have him grab me closer.

"I'm gon'a make Joe clean up, I want ya back in my bed."

"Again" I just about moan as his hands continue to travel all over my body.

"Yea, ya think I forgot about what ya did in there?" he asks cupping me between the legs and rubbing.

I bite my lip and close my eyes, leaning into his touch.  
>"No-"<p>

"No, not for a second…shit was beautiful, watchin' my girl's pussy drippin' fa'me."

"Your girl." I state leaning back into his chest.

He nods triumphantly and places a kiss on my neck, "_Mine_."


	18. Love

Love will drive people to do silly things. Crazy, hilarious, stupid, borderline psychotic things. The reason I say this is simply because I've done ridiculous things for what I thought was "love". But nothing, nothing could be more evidence of this fact than waking up to Billy's smoky apartment.

It's been a few weeks since that night that I told him I loved him. And since then if I haven't been at his place I'm at work. He won't let me leave. Whenever I decide I should to go home he goads me into staying. It doesn't take much more than a subtle suggestion on his part that he wants me to stay. But even a subtle suggestion that he wants me to stay is adorable enough to make me do it. And so I don't go anywhere. During the days I do normal stuff, go to work, pick up Jase, and babysit him until my mother gets home. But by the evening when Billy is finished working for the day I always get that call or text that I should stay the night. At first I feared, still, that it was sex related. And while we do have a very healthy sex life more than half the time we don't even have sex. So you could imagine my surprise after waking up after a night of not having sex and bingeing on junk food in his bed and watching stupid actions movies to a smoky house with the horrid smell of something gone wrong in the kitchen. I sprint from the bedroom to the kitchen, coughing from the smoke.

When I reached the living room I could hear Billy cursing from the kitchen where the smoke came from.

"What happened?!" I exclaim fanning my hand in front of my face.

He dumps a frying pan with a big black lump of something in it, in the sink. He fans in front of his face and curses again loudly.

"Fuckin' piece a'shit!"

I turn off the burner on the stove which he had all the way up, blazing.

The moment I realized what was happening I covered my mouth, smiling beneath my hand.

"What did you do?" I ask. He walks around me to open the small window in the kitchen and the smoke starts to dissipate.

"I was…tryin' t'make ya fuckin' breakfast, burnt my fuckin' elbow…" he mumbles putting his hands on his waist, refusing to look me in the eyes as he explained himself. Biting my lip hard I whimper from the base of my throat. He glances at me to see the big smile on my face.

"Don't fuckin' look at me like that."

"I-I'm sorry, I don't know what to say."

"Don't say a word, go get dressed I'm takin' ya t'breakfast."

Smiling widely I walk closer to him and put my hands on his neck, leveraging his head closer to plant a kiss on his cheek. When I start to walk away he wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me back, planting a firm kiss on my lips then nodding out of the kitchen. The moment I step out the kitchen and into the living room the front door is thrown open. I gasp and freeze where I'm standing in Billy's shirt and a pair of my underwear.

Standing there with a grim expression is a man I've never seen but heard of. It only took me a second to realize it was Billy's "boss". He, Joe and the rest of the guys rarely refer to Bones by his name, calling him names like fat fuck or fat ass. And the sloppy bulbous man before me, eyeing me like meat is the only person I could think of that would have the balls to bust in Billy's apartment like that and not be beaten to a bloody pulp on sight.

That however didn't stop Billy from sprinting from the kitchen and tossing me behind him the moment this all happened. I stand there in shock.

"Mmh I guess they weren't lyin' about ya pretty brown piece'a ass, nice tits," Bones says trying to get a look at me around Billy.

I grimace and open my mouth to ask who the fuck he thought he was talking to. Knowing what was to come, Billy reaches behind and pats my thigh firmly, telling me to keep my mouth shut at once.

"What'cha doin' here Bones?" Billy grouses stepping further away from me. I follow behind him, staying close to his back. Something told me that if Billy's being cautious around this man then there's no doubt about me doing the same.

"Ya wouldn't believe how quick shit travels in this town, Nazi."

I glare over Billy's shoulder at him.

Billy doesn't say anything, his entire body is tense and through said body language I'm not sure what the hell he's prepared to do.

"Ya got news?" Billy asks crossing his arms over his chest.

Bones walks in and all the way, throwing the door closed behind him with an over exerted show of force. As if he owned the place he struts across the room, kicking aside the small coffee table in front of the couch to make room for his large ass. He plops down on the couch and the moment he gets comfortable his eyes are on me. I look away, clutching Billy's shirt.

"She's fuckin' gorgeous boy, gotta let me get a taste…c'mere honey," he pats the spot right beside him on the couch with a creepy perverted smile on his face.

"Ignore'em," Billy grouses.

"I'll fuckin' shoot ya and ya bitch kid, don't get cute," Bones snaps suddenly, his face becoming hard and familiarly hard at that. I try to conjure up where I've seen that face mixed with pure annoyance and a quiet rage.

"Listen Reese, I need ya t'go in the bedroom I need t'talk to the Nazi." he asks although I know it's not a question.  
>I stare at him in silence not hiding my disgust, he kisses at me and I cringe a little, "Just call me papi one time." He nods with a stupid smile on his face.<p>

Rolling my eyes I tug Billy's shirt.  
>"Ga'head." He says over his shoulder, his voice it tight with annoyance.<p>

I walk around him and shuffle quickly to the hallway, ignoring Bone's comment about my ass. The moment I'm out of his gaze I feel better, I don't want to throw up and wrap myself in mounds of fabric.

I close the door for them to hear and quietly open it to hear what they're saying.  
>"A spic boy?" I hear Bones ask Billy.<p>

I clench my fist and bite my lip hard. Billy doesn't say anything, and I know for a fact had this man been anyone else they'd be in severe pain right about now.

"What ya want Bones?" Billy asks.

"Ya know what I want, if I don't have my fuckin' money by the end of the-"

"I got another week-"

"Just a friendly reminder Nazi. I'm the only reason you an' ya half-wit fuckin' friends aint up in Walpole right now."

"This aint news t'me Bones, I'll have ya fuckin' money."

Bones chuckles, "I aint gonna lie, I heard about ya girlfriend in there…prancin' around ya apa'tment every fuckin' night."

"And?" Billy retorts.

"Welp, ya know it's polite to share, son."

Son?!

I gasp, covering my mouth immediately as the word marinated. That's his fucking father?!

"I aint never been polite, I'll send Andrea over to'ya t'night."

Bones chuckles darkly, "Is this love, Nazi?"

I hear the couch whine under his weight, assuming he's rolling from his seat. I hear Billy sniff as he does when he's severely annoyed. A few steps sound and Bones says.

"Get rid of'a."

Billy doesn't reply and I pray he isn't nodding so I can't know the answer. After another beat the heavy footsteps move in the opposite direction. The front door opens and slams shut again.

I move from the door and sit on the bed. The moment Billy gets back here he knows I've been listening. I'm nibbling on my nails watching him carefully. When our eyes meet he clenches his jaw and inhales deeply before exhaling harshly.

"Billy. Bones is your father?"

He huffs and trudges to his dresser, yanking out clothes from each drawer roughly. He gives a stiff nod, confirming what I was sure of. It explains why that look of his was so damn familiar. And I thought my father was fucked up.

"You…he sleeps with your girlfriends?"

Billy throws on jeans and retorts, not looking at me, "I don't got girlfriend_s_."

"You know what I meant." I say fidgeting my hands in my lap.

He glances at me and sniffs, "Get dressed."

Breakfast didn't seem all that appealing to me anymore.

"I'm not hungry, talk to me."

"Yea a'right. He gets whoever the fuck he wants, now get dressed."

I furrow my brow at him and stare in utter shock.  
>"Does he now? So when do I get a turn."<p>

His blazing eyes fix on me after he's thrown on a black t-shirt.

"Don't say that shit again, you heard me tell him no," He snaps.

"You're right, but…Billy are you a fucking pimp do you-"

"I already told ya not t'ask me about work. Now get dressed."

"Why so you can dump me at the diner?" I snort.

He looks at me and looks absolutely aggravated, not entirely with me but with everything this morning. First his burnt breakfast, then his twisted father hitting on me and now accusations.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."

He nods and grabs his shoes. I stand up and get dressed as quickly as possible. As we walk out his room I remember what that disgusting man said to me. I grasp Billy's hand to get his attention as he walks ahead of me.

"Don't ask me to call you papi again," I say when he turns to face me.

His brows go up and he stares at me in silence for a long time. He then nods and clears his throat, "Yea, ok."  
>Tilting my chin up, he presses a few kisses to my lips. With his forehead against mine he says.<p>

"I'm sorry," I don't need an explanation for the apology, it's for his father.

"It's not your fault." I reply petting his hollow cheek, I kiss him again and smile, trying to brighten his mood. Walking ahead of him I keep holding his hand, asking with a more cheerful disposition.

"You gon'a let me drive your car?"

He snorts, "In ya fuckin' dreams kid."

After we eat he takes me home. I ask if he wants me to come back tonight, he tells me no. He has shit to do.  
>And so after a quick kiss I get out of the car and go inside. Even after an easy breakfast his mood is tarnished. I made him smile and laugh a few times but it isn't enough, his father really did a number.<p>

So I don't push.

No one is home when I get there. I'm surprised up until I realize it's 1:15 in the afternoon on a Tuesday. After sitting there all lonely and bored for a few minutes I dial Tia's number. I'm hoping she isn't with Joe, despite the fact that I'm just as greedy about my time with Billy. She answers after about the 3rd ring.

"Are ya home?" She asks.

"Yea, I was going to tell you to come over."

"Good, I'm on my way anyway, I just got off work and my feet are dying and I have to pee."

"Okay, I'll leave the door open for you."

She gets there not so much later. Once she pees, kicks off her shoes and gets some food in her we lay around the living room watching TV.

"How's work?" I ask.

"Fine, I'm so close to quitting though. Joe keeps telling me he'll take care of me."

"Don't do that, that's stupid Tia."

"Doesn't Billy say the same thing to you?" she asks.

"Yea, but I told him I'm not fucking nuts and to stop asking."

She laughs, "Oh you have balls woman, but it's so cute. Billy thinks he's all tough, but that's just until you come around."

I smile and shake my head, "Yea…but it's for a good reason…I suppose." The moment the statement is out my mouth I realize how ridiculous it was to even say. For good reason? My boyfriend who's a prominent drug dealer and possible pimp only shows a certain brand of affection toward me because he can't look too weak. Why? Because in a town like this weakness means death.

"You ever think of leaving?" I ask seriously.

Tia inhales deeply, "I used to…no way I could leave now I guess."

"Why?" I ask.

"Joe…I know how dumb it sounds, but I love him."

And a few months ago I would not be able to empathize with that. Right now I can.

"Well, don't you think he should leave to?" I ask, "I mean Billy too. What's keeping them here? We could all just leave, find like a town house far away from Boston and…" God what the fuck am I even suggesting?

"Do you hear yourself?" She asks with a laugh, "You're asking if Billy Darley would leave this place? Leave and do what exactly? There aren't many jobs on the market for someone with his set of skills.

"I know…but Tia, if we really cared for them…wouldn't we want the best? I know I do. If he stays here things only wind up two ways. For Joe too."

"I know that Reese, but this is who they are. People like them don't leave and get a happy ending. The sooner you accept that the better off you'll be."

And she's right. God dammit, she's right. I want to give them the benefit of doubt. But no matter how many times I tell him I love him, or how many times he nods back, I don't see him giving up this life for me.

"How will I be better off? I…" The realization hits me, "I'll be like my mother."

"There's only one way that won't happen and I think you know how that plays out."

The answer is grim all on its own. All I want to do it cry. Literally cry because the answer is simple. It should end.

We sit there solemnly, Tia thinking over the same thing I am. After a while she says, "Yea, this is why I stay away from deep thinking."

I wanted to be mad at Tia for saying those things. I wanted to kick her out in all seriousness just to be alone with my thoughts. But she was absolutely right.

"Only thing we can do is be smart and know when it's time to break out."

"This is so fucked," I laugh shaking my head harshly before putting my palms over my eyes.

Tia chuckles a little and shakes her head as well.

"And it's all your fault, like always," I laugh harder.

"Oh fuck off!" She laughs whacking my chest with the back of her hand.

I gasp in pain, a soreness I hadn't felt before irritating them, "Ow, fuckin' hurt." I moan, still grinning as I massage my breast.

"Serves ya right, I never forced you to poke that bouncy house that time. You did it all by yourself."

I laugh harder when I remember us at this little girl's birthday when we were like 8. Tia was convinced that I was too chicken to do it, and so I did. When the house sunk to the ground and all the kids inside screamed and cried to get out we'd never laughed so hard. Only when we got found out I got my ass kicked well for it and stopped talking to Tia for 2 hours at school following week.

Funny how some things never really change.

As far as parallels go, I've already popped the house, we're just waiting for it to sink to the ground now.


	19. Sick

**A/N:Sorry this took so long, I don't know why I was putting off posting this chapter. The next one is done as well and will be posted sooner than this was. Enjoy!**

The next time I saw Billy we were at the diner getting dinner after I got off work one night. He seemed tense about something and I figured, though I didn't bring it up it had something to do with the money he owed Bones. Since hearing that morning about the money he owed him I never even considered bringing it up to Billy. He was stressed enough, me knowing more about that part of his life would only cause added stress.

And while I was left to consider whether or not this relationship was worth carrying on I was reminded of something the moment I saw him sitting outside of his car waiting for me outside my job. I love him. I'm so madly in love with him that when I saw him I couldn't help but wrap my arms around him when we kissed hello and tell him that I loved him.

With his arms around my waist he gave me a funny look and asked why I said it, to which I simply shrugged before letting him go and walking around to the passenger side of the car. From then on I tried my best to distract him from the stress I could see he was feeling. But he was damn near inconsolable.

As I picked over my chicken tenders and fries, having no appetite for it, tired from my day and trying to get Billy out of his head I start to drift off to sleep.

"C'mon, I'll take ya home." Billy says gruffly interrupting my daze.

At the same moment one of the waitresses walked by with mozzarella sticks. The disgusting smell of the fried cheese wafts into my nose and I cover it immediately.

"That fucking stinks…Jesus."

Billy snorts and stands up, throwing some cash on the table for the food we'd both barely eaten. I don't move as the smell of the food does something untoward to my stomach. I fight the urge to throw up with all the strength I had.

"What's wrong?" Billy asks standing right over me.

I close my eyes and shake my head, "I feel sick."

"Ya not gonna throw up are ya?"

I roll my eyes at him for saying the absolute worst thing. Closing my eyes I drop my head on the table and take several deep breaths.

"Fuck, fuck." I groan as my stomach churns.

"Yea, c'mon I'm takin' ya home."

Closing my eyes tightly I wait a few more seconds for the churning to stop. Once it does I sit up and lean my head back against the seat.

"Ya'aright?" Billy asks putting the back of his hand on my cheek. I take a deep breath and stare at him.

"Not really, do I feel hot?"

He moves his hand to my forehead, "I dunno, maybe. C'mon let's get ya home."

He grasps my hand and helps me from the booth. In his car I notice he takes extra care to drive slow, not making his usual sharp turns and pedal to the metal speed habits. When we get to my building he gets out of the car when I do.

"What are you doing?" I ask walking around to the sidewalk.

"Walkin' ya up, ya look like ya about to pass out."

He might have been right I was far from okay.

"It's fine, I can get there by myself."

He rolls his eyes at me and follows behind me as we walk up to my building.  
>"Really Billy, I'm fine."<p>

"Can it Reese." He retorts.

I sigh and let him walk me up to my floor. At the door he waits for me to unlock it before reaching over to peck my lips. I kiss him back and we both lean away.

"Go see a doctor."

I nod, "I will."

He nods and kisses my lips again, "See ya t'morrow."

When he tries to walk away I pull him back and kiss him slower. He presses me against the door and dominates my mouth with his, hovering over me, his arm caging me in over my head.

"I love you." I say when our lips separate for a second, "I wish I could come home with you."

"Nah, ya should stay here, I go-"

"Got work." I say cutting him off.

He smirks, holding my face up with both hands to kiss me again.  
>"See ya in a few days a'right."<p>

"Okay." I kiss him a few more times before we let each other go.

He walks to the steps and waits for me to go inside and lock the door before I hear his boots clunk back down. It was pretty late in the evening so my mother and Jase were both in bed. But I checked both their rooms either way. Seeing that her beside lamp was on I knock on the door lightly in case she was asleep.

"What?" She answers.

I let myself in, leaning against the wall beside the door as I asked how her day was. She regaled me with tails of her incompetent boss and how she could run that damn place better him.

"Ma, I think I may need to see the doctor," I sigh laying on the end of her bed as I did sometimes.

"Why? What's wrong? Come here," She pats the spot beside her and I crawl up to lay my head on her lap. Pressing the back of her hand to my forehead she sighs, "You're a little hot, how you feel?"

"Like crap, I almost threw up with B-I mean at work earlier. You think it could be a virus?"

She doesn't say anything but inhales deeply and sighs, "Fuck _mija_."

I sit up to look at her, "What?"

"You were nauseous all day?"

"No, just this evening."

"What about your breasts, they been sore?"

I feel them a little and realize they had been very sore these last few days.

"Yea a little."

"Jesus, what the fuck was the point of birth control if you didn't use it Reese!?" She suddenly yells sitting up a little and glaring down at me.

With furrowed brows I sit up as well and shake my head.  
>"What are you talking about?"<p>

"Your breasts are sore, you're nauseous, when's the last time you got your period."

"Last month, I was supposed to start today but-fuck."

We both collapse on her bed with a loud sigh. For several long minutes she doesn't say anything and neither do I. That is until it hits me that I could be carrying a baby. Not just any child, a Darley. I don't even know if I want kids, I'm actually positive that I don't. Not in this day and age and certainly not in this damn town. And the proverbial house sinks further, another reason this place should be nothing but a memory in my rearview. I could see it now, just mentioning the idea of a kid to him and him in return not so kindly rescinding his invitation of being his girlfriend. That part I think I could handle more than the fact of raising a child on my own. Becoming my mother.

"I'll make an appointment for you on Monday, you're off work right?"

I nod, still stunned silent.

"You can come in with me and I'll do it myself."

Pros to being the daughter of a nurse, we get free health coverage. Including, if ever the need for an accurate pregnancy test on the spot. I roll over and bury my face in my mother's stomach like I did as a child. She puts her hands on my back when I groan.

"I can't have a baby, ma."

"If you can lay down to make one you can." She retorts now smoothing her fingers through my hair.

My mother lets me stay there with her through the night, holding me in her arms until we fell asleep.


	20. Her

Author's POV

Billy left his apartment, his mind on Reese the whole time he made his runs. She was literally always on his mind no matter what he was doing or who he was with. All of his thoughts would somehow travel back to her. She was so engrained in him now that not speaking to her some days was a strain. And while he hated the idea that she had taken control of his life (whether she knew it or not) he wouldn't have it any other way. She loved him and he knew without a doubt it was true simply from the way she looked at him. Not to mention she said it as often as possible.

He never thought words could feel that good, and yet there he was giddy as ever because of them. Especially since he felt the same way, it wasn't just some stupid girl he didn't care about screaming she loved him while they fucked. No. Reese was the only girl he ever cared about and once he realized this, it wasn't something he took lightly. And all the clichés about love and how wonderful it felt to be loved had never felt so right for Billy. He'll never forget how amazing he felt the moment when he was climbing out of bed and Reese grabbed his arm, wrapping hers around his neck. He held himself above her, staring down at her as she looked him in the eye and said, "I love you."

Billy of course didn't say it back but left her knowing he felt the exact same. He had absolutely no idea when it happened; but he knew he was in love with her the moment he saw Collin standing behind her with his chest against her back. He was of course questioning those feelings before that moment. But it was solidified when he realized he'd kill someone over a woman. He'd never felt that intensely about anyone. Not enough to outright shoot some idiot for touching what was his.

Forcing himself not to think of her was a task, but he learned to manage it.

The money he owed Bones was due and waiting to be picked up from the office. This was bribe money plus Bones' "cost of doing business", an even 40 grand. 20 to the crooked captain that would erase and evidence on his whole operation; and 20 to Bones. Billy worked his and his gang's asses off to make it.

It only took him 15 minutes to get to the office and pick up the money. He had Bodie count it out using the cash counter in front of him before he put all the money back in the duffle bag and load it his car . He couldn't help but feel a little arrogant and cocky as he strolled into his father's office. Bones had boasted about how Billy would never be able to make the money on time, and how excited he'd be to blow his and the rest of his friends heads off.

From just outside the door Billy could hear two voices including his fathers. Without knocking he walks in, ignoring the presence of the man on the other side of Bones' desk. Placing the duffle bag on the desk, as he'd been instructed not to do countless times.

"Fuckin' moron, how many times I gotta tell ya t'look where the fuck ya drop shit!"

Spit flies from the disgusting man's mouth and the threat that follows falls upon deaf ears. Because once again she is on his mind.

"There's ya money," Billy spits nodding to the bag, he turns to leave but is stopped by Bones' harsh voice. It annoyed him how much they sounded alike.

"Ah ah…get back in here. Count it out boy."

Billy sighs and turns back around. The police captain, his green eyes focused on the bag, points to the same cash counter Billy had Bodie use back at the office. Once all the money is counted for the umpteenth time Billy splits it exactly down the middle, handing both men their share before catching the captain's attention.

"I'm not gonna hear shit after this right?"

"Unh huh," the man nods, all too pleased with himself. Billy doesn't bother saying thank you. He struts out feeling a small percentage of the heavy weight on his shoulders dissipate. And now he needed a stiff drink…several stiff drinks. Billy pulled up to Four Roses hastily. The moment he opened the door he barked his order to the bartender, demanding a 5 shots of Jack Daniels. Not wanting to abuse his limit Billy left with a very small buzz. On his way out he wandered to his car, for the moment forgetting about everything else, but remembering how much he missed Reese.

Gripping his car keys he trudges to his car, looking down at his phone thinking about calling her the entire way. That is until he hears a voice. It sounds familiar and unfamiliar at the same time.

"Billy Darley," The woman's voice said.

Billy turns to face her, surprised when he saw Reese's face. The woman was 2 times Reese's age but had the girls face almost down to the t. Billy froze, it was weird how much they looked alike. Standing about half a foot shorter than Reese, the woman stared up at Billy with a stoic expression on her face.

"Yea?" he grunts staring at her in confused annoyance.

She doesn't say anything for a very long time, just staring him up and down with her hand gripping her purse tightly to her side.

"Can I help you?" Billy snaps.

Clearing her throat she says, "You've been dating my daughter."

Billy hated that term, dating. It was annoying and sounded clingy. Watching the lady intently he leans back against his car and folds his arms across his chest.

"Le'me guess, this is the part where ya tell me t'stay away from Reese," he says with a smirk on his face.

"Not as stupid as I thought, but yea. If you care about her at all then you let her go."

"No." Billy wasn't about to negotiate losing Reese to anyone, not his father or her mother. She was his.

"You don't care about her?"

Billy glares at her, his expression is all the response he planned to give.

"Don't give me that look…like I'm supposed to be scared of you," She almost sounds amused at the thought of him trying to intimidate her.

"She'll always be at risk because of you, and so will my grandchild, and I will not let that happen."

Billy's whole entire world was turned on its head. Nothing made sense. He was trying to remember how many other siblings Reese had. And unless that skinny little runt went and got his first ghetto girl pregnant then there was only one other answer. His face showed everything, the shock, the dismay and confusion that was the fact that he could very well be a father. Not only that but Reese knew and did not tell him. And with his confusion the sense of betrayal he felt by the woman he loved was palpable.

This was precisely why he avoided shitty things like relationships and anything more than one night stands. Lying bitches and pregnancy scares. The first instinct in Billy's mind was to run. He told himself to run and ignore this little issue until it worked itself out, meaning until Reese and her intrusive fucking mother got the hint that he wanted nothing to do with any child.

Of course, the instinct had not yet actually made an impression on his heart. His heart which his smart ass, gorgeous woman had in her grips was telling him to go to her. To hold her close and tell her he was terrified but wouldn't/couldn't leave her. Of course after scolding her for being stupid and not telling him first he'd hold her all night and maybe take out whatever anger he had left on her ass as he pounded into her from behind.

A fucking kid? The thought never even crossed his mind. Billy was a big fan of women's rights. His favorite things about it included quick and easy access to all forms of contraception including the abortion. Up until Reese he had no reason to question the morality of abortions, but now that the thought was smack dab in his face he was weary. Billy was sure that if ever he was faced with this turn of events it would be with some sleaze he didn't give two shits about who had no problem with a day trip to the clinic. Somehow the thought of his woman doing the same made him sick, almost as sick as the idea of her being pregnant with his baby.

"Ya fuckin' lyin'" The sneer on Billy's face was deadly. He takes two steps forward and is hovering over the woman by more than a foot. Glaring at her, waiting for her to break and confess it was all one big joke.

She didn't even bat an eye. She tilts her head to the side, waiting for him to get over his shock and behave reasonably. He was a child, she'd be damned if she let a moron like him intimidate her.

"And now you tell me on what planet would me lying about the fact that my daughter is pregnant by a fuckin' piece of shit like you makes sense."

Billy doesn't move, he doesn't speak and when he realizes his expression wouldn't make the woman falter he gives up. He had too much on his mind to waste his time on intimidating some fucking old lady. Just when he thought himself out of one situation and less burdened another one was bought to light. He takes a step back and leans against his car, his eyes focused on the dirt, unmoving.

"Why…" his voice is barely above a whisper. Realizing he sounded weak he cleared his throat and said, "Why didn't she tell me?"

"Because I told her not to," she lies. The truth was Reese was terrified of telling him and was waiting to find out if she was actually pregnant before telling him. Her mother on the other hand wanted him out of the picture, betting that he would take off like she expected. So even if Reese wasn't pregnant or was and decided to have _the _procedure, Billy would be out and she'd realize he was never any good for her and move on with her life.

After another long pause she says, "This was just a courtesy call. We don't expect anything of you."

Billy was still silent, glaring at the ground trying to sort through his emotions.

"Aint ya decision."

"Excuse me?" she snaps.

"What Reese and me do is none of ya business, so butt the fuck out."

"You think you can take care of a family? Provide for them? You're still a child, how do you expect to take care of a baby and my daughter?"

He doesn't say anything for a while, "Ya let me worry about that." He retorts.

"No. They're not going to sit around and wait for you to get your shit together, I'll take them away. My grandchild will not grow up here."

"Ya don't get t'say where _my_ kid goes, they're _mine_, _my_ responsibility, _not_ yours." Despite the fact that Billy didn't even want kids his possessive nature would be damned if someone took away what was rightfully his.

Reese's mother is absolutely surprised at his response. She expected for him to let them go, take the easy way and get Reese and the baby off his back.

"Why? Why do you want that responsibility huh? I'm giving you a pass, you can go about fuckin' whatever skanks you want, shootin' up innocent people and hookin' them on that shit you make a living off of. You want to give that up?"

Billy didn't even have to think, which surprised the hell out of himself when he said yes without a moment's hesitation. His life, which his girlfriend's mother had just put into one fucked up sentence didn't sound appealing anymore. Imagining Reese being anywhere but in his arms at night and a child that looked like him calling some other man daddy broke him down. He couldn't give that up, not for all the dirty money in Boston and certainly not for any old piece of ass that couldn't make him feel half as good as Reese could with just a smile in his direction.

What the fuck was happening to him?

As all these things ran through his mind the words slipped from his mouth in Billy's most vulnerable moment to date. Reese's mother watched on in shock and awe as the hulking man stared at the gravel and mumbled.

"I love her."

They remain quiet, when Billy realizes what he's said he closes his eyes and grits his teeth, hard.

With wide eyes the woman clears her throat, she knew just from the look in his eyes that he meant it. He was in love with her daughter.

"I…I believe you."

Billy can't even look her in the eye.

"But that isn't enough. If you really love her you'll get your shit together and make a good life for your family like a real man."

Rubbing his aching shaved head he grunts, "I'll try."

"Not good enough, I can't do shit with try and neither can Reese and your child."  
>Billy glares at her again.<p>

"I told you I'm not scared of you so cut it out with the looks. You need to make a choice Billy, either you grow up or do the right thing and let them go."


	21. No Choice

When I get home I lay down in my bed, still fully clothed and emotionally exhausted. Using the deafening silence alone to actually sort out how I feel about everything. I'm liberal, very liberal and I always told myself before now that if I ever got pregnant before I was ready I'd have no problem getting an abortion. But laying here, stroking my still flat stomach with what could be a baby that Billy and I created, the idea seems not only ludicrous but incredibly sad. I couldn't.

If it had been anyone else, maybe a one night stand or just someone I regretted sleeping with I could do it. But even if Billy doesn't stick around, to know that I love him and we made this child is too much to bear and go through with snuffing out. And there soon after I make the decision my mind begins to race and wonder about what gender the baby would be, whose eyes they'd have and praying for it to have his eyes or his smile. Then I wonder if things like that will become an ugly reminder of him. Because at this point I have no doubt in my mind that he's not going to stay with me. Like all those other disillusioned single mothers would I grow old resenting those eyes and that charming smile our child could possibly inherit? These are the thoughts that lull me to sleep. It's only temporary though. My phone buzzes once and I chose to ignore it, but when it continues buzzing I have no choice but to sit up and answer.

When I see his face on the screen I gulp and my heart beats faster.

"H-hello, hey, hi baby," I already know I sound like I'm over compensating.

"Come outside, I need t'talk t'ya," his tone is short and trite.

"You're here now?" I ask, my voice up by several octaves.

"Hurry up." He hangs up.

I swallow a lump in my throat and clear it. He knows. He knows…but how? He can't know, I haven't said anything to Tia. He doesn't know. He doesn't. He doesn't know and you're fine. I chant this all the way down stairs, scared out of my mind as to why he'd been so short with me. Not to mention the impromptu visit.

And as expected he's parked right in front. The car is off and he's waiting inside, staring at me until I reached the door and let myself in. He continued to stare at me, a blank look in his eyes as I get settled in the car with him. When I lean over to kiss him he backs away. His eyes still on mine and I know for sure he's pissed.

"What's the matter?" I ask reaching out to put my hand on his cheek. He turns his head away again, dodging my touch and glaring harder at me.

"Stop it," he grunts clenching his jaw tightly.

"Why can't I touch you?" I ask meekly, staying on my side of the car with my hands in my lap and my eyes studying them.

"Ya got something ya wanna tell m- Look at me."

I shake my head no, to both his question and request.

"Reese." He says my name the way a parent does their kid, no leniency, expecting nothing but obedience and submission. But I'm more scared that I'll break down and cry, admitting everything than I am of his stern voice.

"Now." He snaps.

I flinch from his tone, I'd only really heard him use that voice with his flunkies. I didn't like it one bit then and dreaded the idea of him speaking to me that way. Slowly, under his watchful gaze I lift my head so we're face to face.

His voice is sharp and precise, his eyes are boring into mine with no relent in sight and I literally could've peed myself. Instinctively I lean away from him so my back is against the car door.

"Ya got somethin' t'tell me?"

My heart pounds harder and it's the only other thing I can hear. I rub my sweaty palms together and take a deep, deep breath.

"Uh, I just…well, no. I'm-I have a doctor's appointment t-tomorrow so…" I trail off.

His intense stare doesn't falter.

"I'm only gonna ask ya one more time, Reese."

"What?!" I snap in aggravation.

His eyelids form into slits and I try hard not to hop out the window and run to my room, cowering under my bed.

"Is there somethin' ya need t'fuckin' tell me?"

A shiver grips my spine and I freeze.  
>"N-no I mean, what is it? You obviously know what it is, why don't you tell me?"<p>

"Because you're gonna tell me right now." He retorts smartly, he blinks and I swear it's the first time he's done so since I got in here.

We stare at each other in silence for a long time before I shrug, "I don't know what you want me to say."

"Fine, get the fuck out if ya not gonna tell me, then call me when ya stop bein' a pussy."

I cock my head back, he's never ever talked to me like that.  
>"Excuse you?" I spit raising a brow as he turns his body to face the wheel.<p>

"Ya not fuckin' deaf, I said get out my fuckin' cah if you don't have shit t'say."

"Tell me what it is Billy, just tell me! Stop playing games!" at the same time I'm yelling he's saying over and over in a bored uninterested voice.

"Get the fuck out, get the fuck out, get the fuck out."

I get angrier by the minute and before I can stop myself I scream.  
>"Fuck you! I may be pregnant!"<p>

The car is dead silent. Billy's staring at me with I don't know what emotion because I refuse to look at him. I turn to face forward and try to keep my angry tears at bay. I fail and a tear or two roll down my face. I wipe them away with the back of my hands and wait for him to say something.

"The fuck you mean may be?"

I don't look at him but drop my head as more tears rush from my eyes. I sniffle and wipe them away roughly before turning my head away from him toward the window.

"I don't know for sure, I find out tomorrow at the appointment."

"You lyin' t'me?"

"No, I-I didn't want to tell you until I kn-knew for sure. How did you find out?"

"Ya mother fuckin' told me ya were."

My eyes go wide and I feel my stomach sink even further. I want to throw up right now. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"What? How does she…she knows?"

Billy doesn't say anything but I sit there actually coming to terms with the fact that he knows I may be pregnant and my mother knows who he is. I drop my head back against the headrest and take long labored breaths. I can't decide if I'm happy to not have to keep secrets any more or universally screwed. Fuck.

"I shoulda been the first person ya fuckin' told Reese," he grunts at me.

I stare out the window, not speaking, listening to him but unable to form any type of response.

"Why? To give you a head start on leaving?"

"You think I'd fuckin' do that?" he asks, his voice still dangerously low.

"Don't even act like you haven't thought about it Billy," I sigh shaking my head.

His silence yet again affirms my beliefs.

"Look, you can do what you want regardless of what happens tomorrow."

I grab the handle and let myself out quickly before more tears came. I hear him call out to me but keep moving until I get inside my building. When I reach the first floor I hear him burst through the door.

"Reese." He growls.

I keep walking and stop only when he grabs my hand to make me.

"I aint goin' nowhere."

"Not right now you're not," I reply turning my head away from his, "I'm not asking you to do anything you don't want to do Billy."

"You don't want me to stay?" he asks.

I finally look at him, glaring in his direction, "Of course I do! But I'm being realistic, I can't sit here and hope and pray that you won't leave whenever shit gets too heavy. You have that option, I don't."

He furrows his brows, "What makes ya think I have that fuckin' option?" he asks roughly, moving up a step so we're both at the same height.  
>"Ya think I ca'just walk away from ya so easy?"<p>

I shrug, "Before this no, but this isn't just me you'd be walking away from if that test is positive tomorrow."

"And I aint goin' nowhere. If…if ya are…" his eyes trail to my stomach and he looks truly terrified, as terrified as I am, "Then ya both mine, my responsibility, not ya mother and not anybody fuckin' else"

My bones remain frozen and I can't say or do anything but stare at him. Who is this man? We stare at each other for a while before I smile a little and more tears rush from my eyes. I bite my lip and look down at my shoes.

"You mean that?"

He puts his hand against my cheek and a comfort not even my mother was able to provide captures me.

"'Course I do, I'm not goin' anywhere." He pets my face despite my tears and leans forward to place a soft kiss to my lips.

I wrap my arms around him and lean into him, kissing him deeper.

"I love you so much Billy," I whisper against his mouth.

Sucking on my lips again he pulls me into his chest and grips right under my butt before hoisting me up. I wrap my legs around his waist and let him walk us up the steps to the second floor. Up against a wall he continues to kiss me fervently.

"Whose inside?" he asks

I shake my head, "No one, Jase's at school…ma's at work."

Grumbling in satisfaction he lifts me again and carries me up the next flight of steps, inside my apartment where he kicked the door shut and locked it. In my bedroom he carefully drops me on the bed, hovering over me, his eyes trailing all over my face. It's then that I pay attention to the smell of JD on his breath. I place my hands on each side of his head and ask.

"You drunk?"

"A little." He retorts with an adorable smile.

"You promise you meant all that, it's not just the booze talking?" I ask.

He shakes his head no impossibly fast, "S'exactly what I told ya mom when she tried to scare me away earlier today."

"She did what?" I snap as my eyebrows crease.

"She did what a mom should do, it's a'right baby." He kisses me softly continues to say, "Ya lucky."

"How's that? She's can be such a bitch."

"No. She's not. She found out ya been fuckin' a drug dealer an' might be pregnant by 'im. She just wanted t'protect ya, I respect that."

"But-"

"No buts, and don't call ya ma a bitch no more."

I can tell this means more to him than just me calling her a bitch. It's all about his respect for her and women like her, including his mother. After a defiant moment I nod.

"Okay. But we should talk about some-" he buries his face in my neck, scattering kisses there on down, "things to tahh-alk about Billy-stop," I whimper when he bites my skin and sucks on it.

"Not right now Reese, we ca'talk after, arright?"

I can't help but giggle and ask, "After what?"

He doesn't reply but sits up on his knees and undoes his belt and jeans. Biting my lip I sit up as well and lift my shirt off, watching as Billy stood up to take off his pants. When I start sliding out of my pajama shorts he lifts his shirt over his head. He leans back on the bed, walking on his knees until he's right in front of me. Sitting back on his haunches he nods his head at me.

"C'mere."

I crawl forward and move into his lap. He wraps his arms around me and kisses me deeply, gripping me tightly in an embrace, urging me to do the same to him. His skin feels so good against mine I don't even care if we don't have sex. I just hold on and try to keep myself from crying again. But I want to feel him even closer. Reaching between us I feel his hardening dick and start to rub him teasingly, playing with his head and tugging every few seconds.

He moans against my mouth and moves away, trailing his kisses down my neck and to my chest as he lifts me up a bit higher to reach my breast. He flicks his tongue against my nipple and goes straight to sucking on it, making me shake in his arms.

Leaning my head back I sigh and it turns to a moan the longer I do. He grunts and starts to grind his dick against my lips. Before he can slide in I push him away and shake my head.

"What?" he grouses, his eyes dazed and annoyed.

"Condom." I reply turning around on my knees so I can grab one from my night stand. I'd rather be safe given the chance that I could very well not be pregnant. Wouldn't that be something, if I wasn't and got pregnant thinking that it was okay to fuck raw because I thought I was?

Once I have it and before I can turn to give it to him Billy grabs my hips and slams his pelvis against my ass. "Stay there," he sighs snatching the condom from my hand and putting it on in record time. He pushes down on my back and I arch for him the way he likes. He slides the head of his dick against my folds and between them, tickling me when he moved it from side to side and in circles.

"Fuuuck," I whimper rolling my hips forward and back for a little more friction.

"Tell me what you want baby." He moves his thumb between my legs and rubs my clit around and around.

"Unh" I moan rolling my hips around in sync with his thumb.

"What?" he asks swatting at my ass with his free hand. I jolt forward then move back again wanting more. He grunts and does it again, harder.

"Ah! Fuck me!"

"No." he says suddenly.

I look over my shoulder and open my mouth to speak, "Billy."

"Turn around," he says with a smile on his face. When I lay down he moves down again between my legs, wrapping them around his waist.  
>"That was for not telling me," he says not hesitating and sliding home.<p>

His eyes flutter shut and mine go wide. Laying so we're chest to chest he keeps his face above mine. I move my legs back farther and push up into his thrusts.

"Shit," I cry out.

He continues his slow pace, looking me in the eyes the entire time.

"Faster," I pant putting my hands on his waist and urging him to move faster.

Relenting with one hard thrust he grasps both my hands and holds them above my head with both of his. With his forehead against mine he thrusts all the way in once and holds himself there, grinding up and down inside me. My jaw drops and I moan out loud.

"Fuck, yes Billy."

"I aint goin' nowhere Reese, ya here me?"

He goes back to long strokes, digging deeper inside whenever he bottomed. I could already feel my release growing as I got wetter and wetter by the minute.

"Yea I-I, h-oh god, oh fuck."

"Yea what?" he grunts kissing me quickly.

"I know, I know." I repeat looking him in the eyes.

He's satisfied and lets me know it by thrusting just a bit harder and faster. He lets go of my hands and the bed starts to rock back and forth beneath our weight as he grasps the underside of my knees. He forces my legs back and hooks them over his forearms, allowing him to go deeper.

My eyes roll behind my head and I close my eyes before he can see them go cross.

"Please don't stop."

"I'll never leave ya baby." He moans, his face contorting in pleasure as he spoke and rubbed his lips against mine, "Ahh fuck. Reese, look at me."

I open my eyes and force them to stay open when our eyes meet again. Not to mention his words are almost too much to bare. I wanted to cry again.

"Me neither," I say then kiss him, wrapping my arms around his neck I don't break our gaze as I whisper, "I love you."

I know those words do something to him every single time I say it. The look on his face gives it all away. How big his smile got and how incredibly light his eyes were as well. So carefree and happy. He starts to move faster burying his face in my neck now and moving his hands to cup my cheeks.

"Ahh! Mmnh-nnh!" I moan even louder, digging my nails into his back as I feel myself about to explode.  
>"Yes, yes, yes!" I cry dropping my head on his shoulder, placing kisses up the side of his neck, "Harder!"<p>

He gives me exactly what I need and a second later I come, my legs are quivering and I scream so loud I think the neighbors might have heard. Billy lifts back up so he can see me and attacks my lips with a sloppy kiss, groaning as he moved harder and faster. His entire body tenses and he lets go, his face pressed against mine as he pants trying to catch his breath. He remains on top of me caught up in the bliss that follows sex. I hold him in my arms, stroking his back and kissing him every so often until he got up enough strength to sit up and look at me again.

I smile when he moves hair off my face and rubs my lips with his fingers. He seems nervous but smirks and keeps his eyes on me when he opens his mouth to speak. He doesn't say anything but closes his mouth again and shuts his eyes.

"What's the matter?" I whisper pecking his unresponsive lips softly. And then he says it.  
>"I love ya."<p>

"What?" I reply immediately.

"I said I love you," he chuckles kissing me again, "And if you're havin' _my_ baby then I'll love it too. Ok?"

I can't hold it in any longer, tears pour down my face which I resolve by covering it immediately.

"Ah come on, don't cry," he laughs trying to pry my hands away but I shake my head no and continue crying.

My shoulders shake as I sob uncontrollably.  
>"I-I'm sorry," I stutter shaking my head again, "I'm sorry, you just, you're not kidding are you? Or-or just saying it because you think it's what I want to hear?" I ask somewhat rhetorically, removing my hands to look at his face.<p>

Billy shakes his head, "I was pissed at first an' I don't even want kids but…I just kept thinkin' 'bout a little girl like ya an'…" he trails off.  
>"'Sides, how often I say shit because I think it's what you wanna hear?"<p>

"What are you saying Billy?" I ask.

He sits up and moves back on his haunches, his eyes focused elsewhere in my room.

"If…if ya pregnant then I don't want ya t'get rid of it."

My eyes go wide and I cock my head back, "Huh?"

"I…fuck," he grunts, "I just keep thinkin' about a kid that looks like ya an' gettin' rid of it..."  
>I stare at him in complete awe, for him to be saying the same exact thing I've been thinking is not only scary but fucking amazing. The only thing left to do is make sure he knows exactly what this all entails.<p>

"Billy, you understand what that means don't you? We'd be responsible for a life."

"I know that a'right." He brushes his hand over his head and keeps his eyes away from mine still.

"Like actually be there all the time, changing diapers, late nights, no sleep, getting a real job."

"I been thinkin' about this shit all night Reese,"

"And you've come to the decision that you love me enough to stay and have a baby with me?"

He puts up a hand, "If ya not pregnant don't think I won't be happy about that for a second, but if ya are then…then it's up to you."

I can't help but smile, "And if I don't want to get rid of it?"

I notice his smile despite his down turned face, how it grew at the idea.  
>"Then we're havin' a kid."<p>

I don' move or speak just sit there grinning at him like an idiot. I launch myself in his arms and hug him tight and close for several minutes. He holds me back, placing a kiss on my shoulder.  
>"You love me?" I murmur against his neck.<p>

"Yea," He gruffs, "Ya didn't give me much of a fuckin' choice."

I smile harder and squeeze my eyes tightly as I do, "say it please, just one more time and I won't ask again."

He leans back and puts both hands on either side of my head as our gazes lock. His blue eyes don't falter an inch, licks over his pretty lips and says slowly, "I love you."


End file.
